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Blushy Butterfly

Posted 03-23-2019 at 10:50 PM by Butterfly
Updated 04-22-2019 at 01:23 PM by Butterfly

For those that knew me when I first joined getDare, you might remember that I used to be super blushy. It wouldn't take much for me to hide my face with my blanket or hands, or the move that my roomates coined as "turtling" (putting my head inside my shirt).


Just talking on the phone with Mr. Devious would make my voice go high and squeaky. Knowing that somebody was going to hear my moans would make me literally die from hyperventilating. Talking dirty would have to be done from under a blanket. I couldn't even say words like butt plug, enema or cock out loud.

I was a blushy butterfly.

However, with Mr. Devious' help and influence, I have really grown. I have become a lot more confident over the last five years. I don't get nearly as blushy or nearly as easily. There are still some things that send me hiding or make me blush. For example, knowing that somebody is listening to one of my recordings, or watching porn in front of Mr. Devious.

I have always listed humiliation as a limit, but I have to admit that I kind of like the feeling of being made to blush. To me, humiliation is something that would make me feel ashamed. That is a slippery slope for me and I don't want to go there. I am not saying I would never get to a place where I want to try, but for now, it will remain a limit. However, there is a line right before before humiliation that is a sweet spot for me.

Being put in situations that are just embarrassing enough that make me blush or make me want to hide, that is the sweet spot. When it is done in the right way, but the right person (somebody who I trust and feel safe with), this can be a huge turn on.

However, a bit component of this type of play is that it has to be something that I am slightly forced into. It can't be something that I voluntarily do or come up with on my own. Of course if I were to volunteer and conquer that embarrassing task on my own, that is a victory, however, it wouldn't be a sexual thing for me. It wouldn't be something that turns me on. I need somebody to take control and push me just outside of my comfort zone.


One thing that I have always wanted to explore is gags. However, I am claustrophobic so it is something I have never really explored. Plus, Mr. Devious really likes hearing my noises, so he has never really had a need/want to push gags either.

But as a stepping stone to gags, I purchased a cheek retractor. It causes drool like a gag and can also impede your speech like a gag. Both of those things make me very very blushy. It also has one added quality ... it makes you look silly. This is REALLY bordering on the humiliation line for me, but the thought of being made to wear that and having somebody see it (through a photo or in person) or even just being made to talk while wearing it .... it makes me want to dig a hole and climb into it (but in the best way).

Another thing I have been really thinking about is the thought of having to do something super intimate in front of somebody. Even something as simple as peeing. I have never peed on the toilet in front of Mr. Devious even. I haven't shared this with many people but Mr. Devious used to tease me about making me pee while he listened on the phone ... this thought always made me so uncomfortable and blushy and I knew I would just die, but I also secretly wished he would force me into doing it.

Or I can imagine being tied to the bed, and being forced to watch porn while Mr. Devious lays next to me. Knowing that I want nothing more than to hide my face but I have absolutely no way to do so.


These types of things get my heart racing, make me squirmy and a tiny bit nervous ... butterflies form in my tummy and my face starts to get hot. The feeling of needing to turn away or hide my face, and maybe not being allowed to (forced to look them in the eyes, or maybe they hold my hands away from my face) ... it makes my clit tingle!

I am blushing just writing this blog. These are things that I think about, but don't usually share with others. Usually I don't play the "hint hint" game, because I know it really doesn't get me far, but these are things that are really hard to say. And I guess admitting it also takes away some of the "forced to do it" blushy feeling.

Anyways .... that is all ...


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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    CagedHiruzen's Avatar
    Awww I didn't know you when you first joined but I have read your blogs and have seen you mention you being really blushy and all. This is a cute blog and well written as always :P
    Posted 03-23-2019 at 11:01 PM by CagedHiruzen CagedHiruzen is offline
  2. Old Comment
    Consensus's Avatar
    I was about to say "awwww" but someone already has! Still, awwww! That's beautiful and I totally get it. As someone that isn't great displaying emotions, I love that squishy feeling that comes as the internal part of a blush. I don't outwardly change, so am super jealous that you do!

    That cheek retractor sounds brilliant for it! Enjoy!

    Connie
    Posted 03-23-2019 at 11:40 PM by Consensus Consensus is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Peachybaby's Avatar
    Awwwwe x 3 I hope your doms read this blog and hopefully try to make this actually happen for you☺️ (At your own pace of course!) however an excellent blog post like always ❤️
    Posted 03-24-2019 at 12:35 AM by Peachybaby Peachybaby is offline
  4. Old Comment
    MastersVoice's Avatar
    Awwwww - Heard the noises from the forums and thought I'd join in. What a long way you have come. I can't even imagine you not being able to say certain things and blushing soooo much! How did Mr. D. manage to transform you into the potty mouth I know as Butterfly?
    Posted 03-24-2019 at 06:06 AM by MastersVoice MastersVoice is offline
  5. Old Comment
    Jaro's Avatar
    But you can still make *cute* noises when you're gagged...

    I love how you are always open to exploring and finding new stuff and I love the pictures you added to this blog. Yeah, doing something intimate in front of somebody would be hard but also oddly hot. But indeed it is only hot if you are 'forced' into it, even if it's just a little push!
    Posted 03-24-2019 at 07:23 AM by Jaro Jaro is offline
  6. Old Comment
    IceMaiden's Avatar
    You are too cute!!!!
    Posted 03-24-2019 at 08:00 AM by IceMaiden IceMaiden is offline
  7. Old Comment
    Stopclick's Avatar
    I really like how introspective you are with your kink. For me, humiliation is one of these things that at times I almost find inseparable from submission itself. But i find it's also a subject that can be really tricky to put words to, so excellent job with this post!
    Posted 03-24-2019 at 11:36 AM by Stopclick Stopclick is offline
  8. Old Comment
    Heart's Avatar
    I enjoy blushy butterfly; keep finding ways to make those cheeks pink lovely!
    Posted 03-24-2019 at 11:46 AM by Heart Heart is offline
 

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