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Take time for yourself

Posted 09-13-2018 at 04:16 AM by pranadevil

This might seem counter productive on a site where control is abundant what with master/slave relationships all over the place, but while it's all good for the short term (even a few months) if you have zero free time and are with your partner all the time without any alone time, it will harm the relationship.

So, take time for yourself, doesn't matter what it is. Read a book, play a game, browse this place, or reddit, or any other number of websites, or go for a walk... even better if you can find a hobby you can do for "you".

And by this I mean both partners, and I don't mean ignore each other, but respect the fact that you both need time apart and to rest and refresh. Don't be insulted if your partner suggests they do something themselves tomorrow, be glad they have other interests because it allows you to go and do your other interests.

Yes, do things you love together, if you both love board games then certainly, sit down for a game of 7 Wonders or Catan, or Dominion or whatever, go nuts have fun. But if only one of you does, then let them go play board games one night while you catch up on TV, or hang out with other friends, or play pool, or go to the gym... but make that time, it's healthy!

Then, when you meet up again after you can talk and discuss how the time was, and what happened, and it's new stuff to talk about, and you will definitely enjoy everything more.

Yes, the fantasy of having a slave, or being one, with no choices, no freedom, no ability to do anything but serve 24/7 is a fun one for sure, and the fantasy of keeping a slave chained up indefinitely is great, but the reality is things will turn sour without actually thinking about things, and considering everything long term. Have short periods of a few days, even a week, of full service or whatever, hey, that's all good, but take time out to just enjoy life and have some time apart so you can appreciate the time together even more.

Yes I'm feeling really wholesome today for some reason. No clue why, but fuck it, I'm in an amazing mood and I'm pretty certain it's my thought process for this and my last blog post, and it's cheered up others I've been speaking to, so hopefully I'll help a few of you guys too. Have a great day!
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    Butterfly's Avatar
    This is so important. I preach this to people all the time, yet I always seem to forget to do it for myself.

    I regularly take time away from Mr. Devious to do my own thing, and him his own thing. It is nice to have our space and do things alone. It gives us something to talk about when we come back together.

    And it is so important in D/s relationships as well. Sometimes it is hard to allow for real life when you get wrapped up in the fantasy of an online relationships especially.

    Thank you for the reminder.
    Posted 09-13-2018 at 01:24 PM by Butterfly Butterfly is offline
  2. Old Comment
    Joan Sky's Avatar
    Great message. Thanks for sharing Glad you are feeling amazing!
    Posted 09-13-2018 at 01:27 PM by Joan Sky Joan Sky is offline
  3. Old Comment
    LitDarkness's Avatar
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Joan Sky View Comment
    Great message. Thanks for sharing Glad you are feeling amazing!
    I'm just gong to repeat this. She said everything I wanted to say.
    Posted 09-13-2018 at 01:28 PM by LitDarkness LitDarkness is offline
  4. Old Comment
    pranadevil's Avatar
    Thanks people! I had a real bad moment a few weeks back, with an almost full blown breakdown, and it took a while to get back to feeling good properly, yesterday I felt good, today I've just had a great day, and felt sharing what made me feel good was good things for others.
    Posted 09-13-2018 at 02:31 PM by pranadevil pranadevil is offline
  5. Old Comment
    Joan Sky's Avatar
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by pranadevil View Comment
    Thanks people! I had a real bad moment a few weeks back, with an almost full blown breakdown, and it took a while to get back to feeling good properly, yesterday I felt good, today I've just had a great day, and felt sharing what made me feel good was good things for others.
    I know how you feel. I felt like that three months ago.

    Thank you for taking the time to share with everyone. It helped me feel better reading it. And that you are writing it on the first day you felt great since then, shows what a good heart you have to share your joy with others and hope to spread it as well Thanks again.
    Posted 09-13-2018 at 03:20 PM by Joan Sky Joan Sky is offline
    Updated 09-13-2018 at 03:23 PM by Joan Sky
 

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