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Opening up

Posted 01-15-2018 at 01:13 PM by CSasha

Opening up is hard for me. As I currently seek more family stem therapy session and continueing a shadow therapy book, I noticed, by a the definition of a friend I found - "someone whom you have given the space to point out even the ugly side of yourself (besides supporting you)" - I have no person I have such a deep relationship with. Even with my depression, and when my husband got so sick it troubled me a lot, I had a hard time to even tell a colleague. I seem to have no problems to chit-chat and bond with strangers on the surface, but I totally struggle with getting personal and intimate.

I don't know where it exactly it comes from, at which age I have build up with turtle shell (currently one of my favorite animals, not as a pet but as a spiritual familiar), but I did. And now it's a tough job to change. But it will be worth all efforts.
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    alias's Avatar
    If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always just a PM away
    Posted 01-15-2018 at 01:39 PM by alias alias is offline
  2. Old Comment
    CSasha's Avatar
    Many thanks. I'll consider it in the future. Though I guess, when/if I open up, it will be to closer people first. I take it as an encouragement that the many people around me are ready for giving me comfort. Many thanks.
    Posted 01-15-2018 at 02:00 PM by CSasha CSasha is offline
  3. Old Comment
    subGanymede's Avatar
    I get that, opening up is a real pain in the ass.
    Still, very much appreciate all your efforts to share your perspective on life
    Posted 01-15-2018 at 02:55 PM by subGanymede subGanymede is offline
  4. Old Comment
    I'm probably not the ideal person to be giving advise on this subject but for what it's worth here you go. If there is someone who you feel close enough to that you would like to be able to open up more to them, you could start by asking them how they are. Ask them about the things going on in their life that you know about, their relationship, their family, their cat. Then when they start to open up some, use that as a board to jump off and tell them a bit about your life and how that's going, either by telling them about a similar situation of yours or an opposing situation. This had some success for me in getting closer to a few people at work. I wish you all the best.
    Posted 01-16-2018 at 03:46 AM by elf_ears elf_ears is offline
  5. Old Comment
    little pet's Avatar
    This is very personal, but I'm going to write it anyways, because not too long ago, I found myself in the same place.
    I was shut like a clam, and all my problems, grief and insecurities were put away where no one could see them.

    I was so used to sorting everything out on my own, that I was unable to show weakness or pain, afraid that someone might see through that shell I had so carefully created. Afraid that i would get hurt.

    It was actually through the D/s dynamic that I've been able to open up a little. If only to my owner. It wasn't easy and I have cried a lot during the process. It took an effort to be honest and open about what I was really feeling. And it was very scary.

    But It's also very much worth it. I have been opening up more and more in real life as well. And I found myself surprised by the reactions of others. For instance: they'd never even known about certain things I told them, but now they are out in the open, they can help me out and even give me comfort.

    If you can find someone that you trust, it's worth it. You don't have to throw everything out there all at once. Start with small steps, and see how they help you.
    Posted 01-18-2018 at 01:50 AM by little pet little pet is offline
 

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