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How to Get a Playmate

Posted 06-13-2015 at 06:24 PM by techiegirl
Updated 12-07-2016 at 12:32 AM by techiegirl

Are you tired of being shot down by girls online with the excuses that they are already owned, not interested, or a 'lesbian'?

Sick of seeing girls post pictures of their bodies and not instantly private message you when you tell them it makes you hard?

Well, I've got good news for you! It is completely possible to find a good playmate, just follow these five easy steps and you'll have women begging to play with you, dominant and submissive.

1. Find a girl, you might already have one in mind, eh slugger? Make sure this girl is breathing. That is the only requirement.

2. Don't try and engage her in a normal conversation. You aren't looking for friendship, just a quick lay! Instead, send her an affectionate whisper in public chat, private chat her, post a message on her profile, or send her a private message.

The message should be vague, but include a compliment, for example:
"Hey im looking 4 a prettty young thing 2 own and abuise u interrsted bby?"
"I love ur tits. Wanna dom me?"
"Ur pics make u such a tase."
Actual messages that I have received that made me swoon.

Don't worry about grammar or spelling, in fact, the worse the spelling and the more numbers you use, the more you will be making girls' panties drop!

3. Wait for about ten or fifteen minutes, if she responds, skip to step 4. If she doesn't then clearly you need to up your game. Some girls need to know that a man is 'serious' before they play around.

Send her another message, but make it a little more serious. For example:
"R u ignorrin me?"
"Hey limitted offer bby."
"U wanna fuk?"
Actual messages I have received that made me change my mind about the sender

4. Wait another ten minutes, if she still doesn't respond or responds with something along the lines of, "No, thank you. Not interested. No. Stop messaging me." Then it's time to show this woman what she's missing.

You're going to explain how much better off you are without her and how she is the one being a creep! Accuse her of lying about her sex, even if several other members know she is a woman or begin calling her derogatory names. A few examples:
"Ur probbly not even a chick."
"Ur not even a girl."
"Stupid slut, u don't know what ur missing."
"Wateva. Ur jst a fake gurl and a ttl whore."
"U jst need the rihgt man and ull liek dick."
Actual messages I have received that actually made my panties wet

5. Now that you have made sure that woman knows you're better than her, just lather, rinse, and repeat. You'll find a true girl in no time!

Happy hunting.
Posted in How To's
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    techiegirl's Avatar
    Note: This is directed at annoying straight men. I know that women and gay men can also be annoying and I apologize for not making a How to for these categories.
    Posted 06-13-2015 at 06:26 PM by techiegirl techiegirl is offline
  2. Old Comment
    NorthlandDom's Avatar
    And here I was just grabbing women off the street, when this has so much less risk! Didn't know I needed this how-to until now! So helpful, 5 1/2 of 5 stars
    Posted 06-13-2015 at 06:56 PM by NorthlandDom NorthlandDom is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Shadowice's Avatar
    omg Techie you betrayed me posting some of this messages I sent you! *hangs head in shame* Now that I know you read them why are you still ignoring me? Just teasing I know girls get a lot of unwanted attention from guys that copy and paste the same message to any girl online hoping to get a bite. The best part about that is it gives girls plenty of material to blog about and troll them! I love a good blog about trolls. Btw when will you reply back to me Techie! It wasn't 10 minutes between between asking I am upping my game to 3 minutes!!!! Just kidding I have never sent you a message since you always state you are looking for mainly girls to play with and I am a guy :P Don't like to try and change someones mind that I can do it better then the girls when they favor the girls more.
    Posted 06-13-2015 at 08:37 PM by Shadowice Shadowice is offline
  4. Old Comment
    Ah shite. I tried my best to follow your steps, but step two was too difficult and I accidentally spoke to her like a human being. Rookie error.

    Sometimes I try to imagine what it must be like to be female on one of these sites, then I realise that I really don't want tot be. I don't think that lonely guys understand that they have it way, way easier on these site than the females who get inundated with messages, questioned, harassed and abused.

    Also, if you could do a version of this for bi males, I'd be grateful. I think I'm too gay to follow these steps properly.
    Posted 06-14-2015 at 03:47 AM by An_Jon An_Jon is offline
  5. Old Comment
    perkygirlie's Avatar
    I <3 u bb. Marry me plz?
    Posted 06-17-2015 at 06:09 PM by perkygirlie perkygirlie is offline
 

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