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Kink/BDSM Pet Peeves

Posted 07-24-2018 at 11:45 AM by lola.fox
Updated 07-24-2018 at 12:05 PM by lola.fox

This blog was inspired by a writing prompt and is not targeting a specific person or singular experience. If you’d like to receive the site where I receive my prompts from, please let me know and I’ll pass it along!

Kink/BDSM Pet Peeves


- Being referred to as Miss, Mistress, Pet, Little Girl, Girl or the like by anyone who has not been granted permission to call me a specific title. Whether it’s to show authority of your Dominant status or show respect as a submissive - it’s irrelevant to me. These titles mean something to me (and to others) and I find it presumptuous for people to assume they’re entitled to refer to me by anything other than my name/username without discussion unless it’s stated in my profile that I’m into that sort of thing.

- Being called a nickname/petname by strangers. I’ve had far too many people message me on kik deciding to give me a random nickname when they’ve barely spoken more than a sentence to me and then get offended when I react negatively. I don’t like to feign intimacy - we’re strangers. Have some common decency and refer to me by by name just as you would if you were speaking to me for the first time in person. Don’t be surprised when I firmly correct you - and know that the conversation will be discontinued permanently if you ignore my clarifications.

- Being expected to bend to every whim or make you feel important. I’m not interested in answering every invasive personal question that’s popped into your brain just because I’m verifiably female or submissive. I won’t stroke your ego and won’t apologize for it. It’s not my job as a submissive to make you feel superior. I am not your submissive.

- Finding my photos being posted by anyone other than myself. I don’t care if I’ve posted them in various places - that’s my prerogative. It doesn’t give you permission to repost on my behalf. Even my boyfriend requests my permission to use my photos on his social media whether they’re kinky OR vanilla photos. I also don’t appreciate my photos being saved. That sincerely makes me want to remove my photos from the public eye and to cease posting in general.

- Being told I’m not ‘kinking’ properly. Everyone practices BDSM differently. Your opinion is not relevant to me and my personal relationship. You don’t know what goes on behind closed doors nor do I plan to write a tell all informing you. I prefer to keep some semblance of privacy regarding play and my relationship. I don’t believe in the concept of ‘real’ submissives and ‘true’ dominants. I believe in doing what I feel is right for me and James and that’s a very fluid process. I get a lot of say in my bdsm relationship and that seems to be misconstrued as a negative thing by many people here. If we’re not inviting you into our relationship, you don’t get a say in it.

- Receiving tasks that don’t take the female anatomy/individual into account. When I rarely participate in a TORD thread I’m put off by receiving tasks that presume I can cum from flicking my clit 27 times. Or that I can shove an 8 inch wide dildo into my vagina with my right hand, while doing a backbend and caning myself with my left hand.

- Excessive speech rules and restrictions in the getDare chat. It really interrupts the flow of the chat and make people less receptive to including you in their conversations.


[DISCLAIMER: There is nothing wrong with any of the above topics if you are okay with including them in your play, this is just personal opinion and it is in no way a reflection on how you should live your life.]
Posted in Rants
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  1. Old Comment
    Butterfly's Avatar
    Love this and I agree with everything single one of them!
    Posted 07-24-2018 at 12:06 PM by Butterfly Butterfly is offline
 

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