Blog 2: Just so frustrating

Before I met my wonderful mistress/mommy(TheBitchofBitches) I would always masturbate quite a lot. Orgasm denial had always been one of my favourite kinks but before I met her I never had a mistress long enough to indulge in this specific kink the way I wanted to.

Today is our one month anniversary as domme and sub and I haven't had an orgasm since 2 days after we met. When talking about how we were going to explore this kink I asked her not to make it too easy. I think she got a bit carried away with this request.

Since I first discovered masturbation I don't think I have gone a week without it. One month may not seem like a lot to most people on here but to me that's a crazy amount of time. It feels like it was months since I last orgasmed. I can only dream of how explosive my next one could be.

We have a mommy kid relationship so the way I can earn this orgasm is through a reward chart. When ever I'm good or do something that pleases mommy I get a star. 50 stars equal one orgasm. In the month I have been denied I have managed to earn 42 stars. As I have been getting close to my goal I noticed these stars have been getting scarce. I hope to reach my goal by Christmas. That would be a great gift.

Mommy hasn't made this month easy by a long shot. She has taken stars away for minor incidents. I need to be on my best behaviour all the time. She also restricted me from touching without her permission. This is just the worst when you are extremely horny yet all you can do is sit there looking at it hoping it will magically stroke itself. It never does though She did give me other things to spend stars on which I actually don't like because they only distract me from my main goal. 5 stars gives me 10 minutes touching time and 20 stars gives me a ruined orgasm amongst other things. I have contemplated the ruined orgasm many times but thank god I was strong enough to not give in.

Recently she has started to freely allow me to touch myself for certain periods here and there. This only serves to make me more frustrated because I can never seem to stop. An orgasm is the only escape route in that position and with that not being allowed I find myself sometimes masturbating for ages thinking I should just cum and get it over with. I always calm down eventually though. The reason I usually stop touching is because I couldn't bare the thought of telling mommy I came without permission. Especially after all this time. Sometimes she forgets to tell me to stop and recently I haven't been reminding her because when I do she just tells me to stop straight away.

So far indulging in this kink has had its ups and downs. Sometimes I want to just quite and other times I get a rather proud feeling that I have came this far.

I wish mommy would tease me more and keep me more frustrated than she has been doing but at the same time this could backfire so i don't really know what I want.

She recently said that she might make it a ruined orgasm if she feels like it which is completely unfair. She can be a big meanie sometimes. After all my hard work I hope that doesn't happen but if it does I will have no choice but to go along with her evil plan.

So overall I have loved and hated everything so far but would do it all again and more if it was asked of me.


Ps I love you the mostest TheBitchofBitches(She really does live up to that name sometimes. I don't mind though )