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Intro to Breathplay

Posted 03-29-2023 at 05:22 PM by Butterfly

Breathplay has been a theme that I have been drawn to in porn for quiet a while. I get so wet when I am watching somebody gasp for air through a gas mask, or with a bag on their head. My clit tingles when a bound woman is dunked underwater.

As much as the thought of it has turned me on, and led me to many edges and orgasms, breathplay is a kink that has always resided outside of my risk profile.

So many things could go wrong, despite any safeguards that you put in place. Obviously death is the worst risk. However, there are less fatal risks as well: blood clots, damage to ligaments, bruising, brain trauma due to lack of oxygen or blood. Those are risks that I just haven't been willing to take on, as a top or as a bottom.

But ... it's freaking hot! Control is my biggest kink and turn on. Literally having my life, my ability to breathe in the hands of somebody else .... whooo that is a power trip!

Most of my kink play is online. That means that truly I am the one in control. With this in mind, my Dom and I discussed little ways that we could incorporate controlling my breath into our play. We discussed the risks and decided that there were a few ways we could play where the risk was rather small. If he ordered me to hold my breath during play for example, I could just breathe when needed (or if worse came to worse and I passed out, my body would make me breathe). This was a great thought but I had a hard time holding my breath while edging and moaning. So we purchased some nose plugs. I would put a nose plug on while my Dom controlled my vibrator. This made it so much easier to hold my breath. He would count down from 3, and then I would need to take a deep breath and hold it. He would make me hold it for 5-20 seconds usually. Sometimes there would be a minute or two between when I had to hold my breath, and other times it was one after another.

This worked really well for us, it turned me on so so so so much! and the risk profile was comfortable for both of us.

When we were in person together recently, we added one extra step ... his hand. I would keep the nose plug on and he would cover my mouth with his hand whenever he wanted. I held a squeaky toy in my hand so that if I felt like it was too much, I could squeak it and he would remove his hand. This time he didn't count down at all before he covered my mouth. This really elevated the play, but still kept the risk low enough that we were comfortable. Of course there was a lot of trust placed in his hands (pun intended).

This is one of my favorite types of play that we have done together and it is a massive turn on. However, I don't think I am comfortable with it going much further than it already has. I am very happy with where we are at right now. We can continue to explore and have fun by adding this to other types of play.


Disclaimer: There are risks with all types of play. Make sure to do your own research and education before engaging in any type of play. While there are ways to mitigate those risks, mistakes can always happen. Be aware of the risks and play accordingly.
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    Azyliux's Avatar
    I get a similar feeling of excitement as a Dom when watching and imagining this type of play. But likewise it has always been outside of my personal risk profile as a Dom with the exception of some very mild (token really) hand choking around my sub's neck during in-person scenes. It is certainly something I considered too dangerous to do in any kind of online format (it's specifically included in my getDare limits).

    I very much appreciate you sharing your personal approach to this in an online setting. While I still might not do this myself, it is certainly something I will keep in my mental toolbox to pull out if the right situation arises. I really appreciate these kinds of post, so many thanks!
    Posted 03-29-2023 at 05:33 PM by Azyliux Azyliux is offline
  2. Old Comment
    Lemuricon's Avatar
    One other way to do breathplay is by not restricting as much but controlling the when. i.e. many short interruptions, especially when you can't see them coming they can quickly give the feeling of loss of control. Even just 1-2 seconds in the middle of a breath can hit hard.
    Posted 03-30-2023 at 01:20 PM by Lemuricon Lemuricon is offline
  3. Old Comment
    zephyrnem's Avatar
    I am wanting to try water/breath play. I love hearing from people who have gone through any breath play. Afraid I may never get the chance..or that…when I do…the person isn’t patient and slow…or is too scared even with safeguards. Glad you are having fun!
    Posted 03-31-2023 at 11:26 AM by zephyrnem zephyrnem is online now
  4. Old Comment
    Butterfly's Avatar
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Azyliux View Comment
    I get a similar feeling of excitement as a Dom when watching and imagining this type of play. But likewise it has always been outside of my personal risk profile as a Dom with the exception of some very mild (token really) hand choking around my sub's neck during in-person scenes. It is certainly something I considered too dangerous to do in any kind of online format (it's specifically included in my getDare limits).

    I very much appreciate you sharing your personal approach to this in an online setting. While I still might not do this myself, it is certainly something I will keep in my mental toolbox to pull out if the right situation arises. I really appreciate these kinds of post, so many thanks!
    I am claustrophobic so I would never be able to have a hand around my neck. However, this to me feels safe than that because there are so many muscles and veins in the neck that can be damaged with choking, so it just fit better for my risk profile. I am happy to share my experiences, just as I love to hear from others.

    Also of note, I still keep breathplay in my limits. I wouldn't do this with just anybody.
    Posted 03-31-2023 at 07:42 PM by Butterfly Butterfly is offline
  5. Old Comment
    Butterfly's Avatar
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Lemuricon View Comment
    One other way to do breathplay is by not restricting as much but controlling the when. i.e. many short interruptions, especially when you can't see them coming they can quickly give the feeling of loss of control. Even just 1-2 seconds in the middle of a breath can hit hard.
    Yes, absolutely. I actually love the idea of just hanging out and randomly being told that I am not allowed to breath for a short period of time. It is such a huge sign of control!
    Posted 03-31-2023 at 07:43 PM by Butterfly Butterfly is offline
  6. Old Comment
    Butterfly's Avatar
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by zephyrnem View Comment
    I am wanting to try water/breath play. I love hearing from people who have gone through any breath play. Afraid I may never get the chance..or that…when I do…the person isn’t patient and slow…or is too scared even with safeguards. Glad you are having fun!
    Water scares me but is a huge turn on. I don't think I will ever get to that point.

    Is somebody isn't willing to be patient and go slow, they aren't a good fit!
    Posted 03-31-2023 at 07:44 PM by Butterfly Butterfly is offline
  7. Old Comment
    DeepInnerFreak's Avatar
    Another awesome example of your Dom going at a slow steady pace and building up to things for you. It's so lovely to see. My experience with breath play was to the point you reached (although we kinda just jumped into it after discussing). We were both comfortable going for the me pinching her nose and covering her mouth with her hand as we had sex. As pointed out so much trust has to be there to try this. Their life is literally in your hand(s) as you say. It's so hot though. Not sure I would ever go further with it as this did the trick and I've heard some awful stories of this play going wrong. Thank you for sharing
    Posted 04-02-2023 at 04:30 PM by DeepInnerFreak DeepInnerFreak is offline
  8. Old Comment
    Butterfly's Avatar
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by DeepInnerFreak View Comment
    Another awesome example of your Dom going at a slow steady pace and building up to things for you. It's so lovely to see. My experience with breath play was to the point you reached (although we kinda just jumped into it after discussing). We were both comfortable going for the me pinching her nose and covering her mouth with her hand as we had sex. As pointed out so much trust has to be there to try this. Their life is literally in your hand(s) as you say. It's so hot though. Not sure I would ever go further with it as this did the trick and I've heard some awful stories of this play going wrong. Thank you for sharing
    I think I feel pretty similar to you. I don't think I would take this play much further, but for now this is so freaking hot and I am so excited to continue to explore this.
    Posted 04-02-2023 at 04:46 PM by Butterfly Butterfly is offline
 

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