What do you look for in a kink partner? How does that differ from a vanilla partner?
Posted 01-30-2022 at 01:41 AM by RainbowSky
A post as part of Butterfly's blogging thread
I look for someone I can get along with and talk about general things in life rather than just kink. They have to understand my feelings around sex and masturbation as an asexual. They don't have to necessarily agree with them, but at least understand why its hard for me. They need to have similar kink interests and they need to be quite firm with me. I can be cheeky and try to push boundaries and get away with things - I need someone to be able to go no, you're doing this. Someone who challenges me to try new things and pushes me.
I've never had a vanilla partner so I'm not sure what I am looking for in a person in that sort of relationship. Possibly compromise because of my feelings around sex. Personality is key with vanilla partners - kind, caring, positive. It's still important in kink partners but slightly less so as I'm expecting them to be firm and strict which is different to a vanilla.
I look for someone I can get along with and talk about general things in life rather than just kink. They have to understand my feelings around sex and masturbation as an asexual. They don't have to necessarily agree with them, but at least understand why its hard for me. They need to have similar kink interests and they need to be quite firm with me. I can be cheeky and try to push boundaries and get away with things - I need someone to be able to go no, you're doing this. Someone who challenges me to try new things and pushes me.
I've never had a vanilla partner so I'm not sure what I am looking for in a person in that sort of relationship. Possibly compromise because of my feelings around sex. Personality is key with vanilla partners - kind, caring, positive. It's still important in kink partners but slightly less so as I'm expecting them to be firm and strict which is different to a vanilla.
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