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A New Year, A Beautiful Challenge - 1 year of denial

Posted 01-01-2021 at 04:43 PM by AnalAddict

The last minutes of 2020 had me submerged in pleasure, swept away by one orgasm after another. The first day of 2021 brings a new promise—a year of denial.

When I joined getDare in October, kink was mostly about anal fun and the pleasure of pain—spanking, clamps, the idea of giving someone the power to hurt me and love it. I rarely went more than two days without an orgasm. On lazy days, I used to have more than one over the course of a day. Pleasure was uninhibited. When I submitted to Sir, I started with three days denial. Then 28. I found calm and happiness and a deep submission in giving that ultimate pleasure to him, his to give and to deny.

A few weeks ago, Sir was making me squirm, using his skill to entice excited dread with just a few words. He suggested I wouldn’t get an orgasm in the new year. The idea tore through me, making me writhe. It also made me pause and think. Beyond the excited dread, underneath it, laid a deep need to please and serve him, to try. To find out if that incredible calm I experienced would turn into desperation at some point. If there was a moment when the craving for pleasure would overcome the strong need to submit to Sir. The fact that he truly believed I’d be strong enough and that upon reflection, I did too, had me tell him ‘Yes, Sir, if it pleases you’ with intent and a (near) full understanding of what I was promising.

Every time I thought about a year without orgasms, I got hit with the same mix of emotions—excited dread and calm and the determination to give my all. Even more so when I told my getDare friends and it became more real. Yesterday though, the mix shifted a little. 2021 was near and that long denial became tangible and nerve-wracking. There was the possibility of an orgasm before the year ended, but I tried not to hope too much. My orgasms belong to Sir—I’d only get to cum if it pleased him, no matter what was about to happen after.

Instead I found myself sinking into a beautiful state of submission that afternoon as Sir ordered me blindfolded, gagged, filled with my 9 inch dildo and my XL plug that stretched my ass in the exquisite way only that plug achieves, vibe on my clit, and chopsticks clamping my nipples. Half an hour, hands behind my back, awash with the deep calm of knowing my body and mind owned completely, while every nerve ending was throbbing with pleasure that had my muscles tense and my throat produce moans I was unable to hold back. Even the 20 rubber band snaps to my nipples right after the timer went off and I removed the chopsticks didn’t fully break through the haze, though I needed to pause a few times to breathe through the sting. Fucking my pussy or ass or face or several of my holes at once to edges drove me deeper into submission and further to desperation. By the time Sir ordered me to fuck my ass for 5 minutes to as many edges as I could take, I somehow edged 9 times. Which meant I got to deepthroat my dildo 9 times too, holding it in my throat as long as I could, so far gone, so desperate my gag reflex was almost non-existent as I tried to get the dildo as deep inside of me as I could.

After a few hours break, I came back to Sir at night, with only a few hours before midnight left. The realisation of what was about to start—a year without cumming—sank in more with every question he asked me, and even more when I laid on the bed, blindfolded, holding on to the fisting dildo, the one he told me might be fucking my ass to my last orgasm for a long time. This time, the calm I’d always felt at the challenge was overpowered by nerves. No matter how much I trust Sir, no matter how badly I wanted this, I was facing a long year and felt overcome. He had me sit down at my desk, filled and clamped and with chopsticks on my tongue. Had me write ‘I won’t cum in 2021, because I am a good girl’ thirty times, because he knows exactly how my mind works. The reminder of why I was doing this sank in more with every line I wrote. With it, the calm returned.

Sir ordered me to the bed. Ordered the fisting dildo inside of me. Had me thrust it in me, hard and deep, over and over. I was beyond desperate and I begged again and again, safe in the knowledge that Sir would give me what I needed. I no longer knew what that was, if I needed to cum or stay in this desperation, had no more thoughts, I only registered the pleasure, and the orders he gave. I set a timer for fifteen minutes as instructed, ass stretched by the fisting dildo, pussy filled with my 6 inch dildo, and my mouth now gagged with the 9 inch dildo. Sir told me to fuck at least one of my holes at all times until the timer ran out, and that I was allowed to cum. As the last minutes of 2020 ran out, I came. I gathered memories to last me a year, fucking my ass first until my arm and ass were sore, coming three times. Fucking my pussy with an orgasm that no longer crashed into me, instead filled with immense pleasure that spiked, had me moan into the dildo filling my mouth or throat. Fucked my pussy and my throat until I doubled over with a warm wave of bliss. My pussy again until the timer rang and I just fell back on the mattress, barely breathing and blissed out. Drifted, unable to remove any of the toys that still filled me, until the other alarm I had set rang a few minutes later and I realised 2021 had started.

In that moment, I barely had the words to thank Sir…for the gift I had gotten right before. For these past months—months of a submission that made me happy and content and allowed me to grow, because of his care and trust and the way he gets me. For allowing me to be his.

This report and the ones about my one-year denial that will follow are but a small way to express the gratitude I sometimes can’t quite express.

Thank you, Sir. Thank you, so very much.
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    Bdsub's Avatar
    Good luck, you can do this!
    Posted 01-01-2021 at 05:20 PM by Bdsub Bdsub is offline
  2. Old Comment
    bluedieblub's Avatar
    *Squirms badly* Thank you for the report Addi. I'm going to miss these orgasm reports from you for an entire year. A long year of denial. Happy new year and I wish you the best of luck with your new resolution!
    Posted 01-02-2021 at 01:03 AM by bluedieblub bluedieblub is offline
 

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