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PM Dare Diary – Day 9

Posted 04-03-2018 at 10:53 PM by Yasna
Updated 04-03-2018 at 11:00 PM by Yasna

Today my report is going to be short: I didn't feel well yesterday. I had burnt the candle at both ends over the extended Easter weekend, sleeping no more than three to four hours a night. I felt physically tired and emotionally drained. Even my pussy had given up on its non-stop buzzing and only sent occasional "I'm here", "I'm waiting", and "Don't you forget about me!" messages. As the remainder of the week will be stressful I took a rest day, limiting myself to the dares that required an immediate response.

I had gotten a WATER dare in the morning and a FOOD dare in the afternoon, and both I found extremely difficult to handle yesterday. I comfort eat and I comfort drink soda. And I was in urgent need for comfort. The soda bottles were mocking me … They were calling my name: "Have me! Have me! A little bit won't hurt!" I was close to pouring them down the drain, just to make them (=my internal devil) shut up. But they are still there, untouched. And I already got another WATER dare this morning … And skipping dinner: oh boy! I had (and still have) leftovers from our family Easter lunch in the fridge – so no FOOD dares today or they are going to spoil! And my mom had baked vegan cupcakes. They were so tempting! But I shouldn't keep crying. It was only a pleasure deferred; I'll have them for breakfast, yeah!

I also did a BOTTOMLESS day, doing grocery shopping without wearing panties, mostly because I had already started it and didn't want to allow it to go to "waste". It felt nice, but I wasn't involved as much as I could have been. A PEE dare was requested too and I followed through with it, pouring pee over my face before my shower in the evening. The humiliation and the idea that I "had" to do this although I didn't want to do it at all aroused me. During the subsequent shower I gave my nether regions a little bit more attention than it was justified by pure hygienic considerations. But that was as kinky as I got yesterday. I was in bed shortly after 9pm, read a little (non-erotic), and soon drifted off to sleep …

I got an interesting PM this morning. At the moment I identify in my profile as "switch, currently in sub mode". I was asked: "You have a sub mode, is there a switch where you could engage it?" I've been aware of my submissive tendencies since the beginning of puberty, but only recently I discovered that I sometimes enjoy dominance too. Both submissive and dominant desires can lie dormant for some time. When I'm dominant I'm acting in a playful way. I can be playful as a submissive too. But sometimes (like now) my submissive tendencies get serious. Bloody serious. Sometimes my dare givers encourage me to retaliate. When I'm in playful mood I have fun doing so. Right now I really can't. It would feel like an overbearance. There might be a "switch" that activates my serious "sub mode", but I don't have full control over it.

Dares done: BOTTOMLESS, WATER, FOOD, PEE

Dares open: SPANK ASS RW 25, SPANK PUSSY RW 25, RUBBER CLIT 20, GAG PENIS (3x), COLLAR (3x), PLUG, HEELS, BLIND, NAKED (2x), EDGE 30, HUMP 10, FUCK, DEEPTHROAT, SLAVE DAY
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