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Person
06-19-2010, 04:02 PM
First off, hello. This is one of my first stories, so I don't know if it will be good. So I need your help with feedback, suggestions, ext. The two characters in it are Danny and Marrissa. They are both about 16. And the main character is Danny. Oh, one more thing, they are on summer break. So, that's taken care of.. let the story begin!
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Chapter I

Ugh. Another Friday night of nothing. Just being bored. I'd been on the internet for about an hour, and was about to close the browser when I received an IM Message from Marrissa. She was one of my best friends, and I will admit that I like her, but making one thing clear: I am not dating her.


Marrissa -From: xxmarrissaxx - hey danny what's up?
Dylan - dylanator16 - hey. nothing, i'm bored out of my mind..
From: xxmarrissaxx - that's lame. hey i have an idea!
dylanator16 - what?
From: xxmarrissaxx - you could come to my house and we could play a little truth or dare! since it's summer break and our parents are on a vacation!
dylanator16 - sure! i'll be right over!

Me and Marrissa have played truth or dare quite a few times, and by that I mean a lot, so it isn't that new, but still fun! We have seen eachother naked and did things like that before. It was only 7:00 PM, (19:00) and it was already getting dark! I'd better hurry, I thought. She lived only a couple blocks away, so I decided I'd just ride my bike over. A couple minutes later I was at her house.

Right when I got to her house, she opened the door up and said "Come on, hurry," in a not strict tone but anxious. She had a really nice house. Inside, the lights were dimmed and a couple of candles were lit. There was some music playing, too. She even had a small indoor pool. "Have some snacks or something," said Marrissa.

"Nah, no thanks, I'm good," said Danny. At first, for about 15 minutes, we just talked about normal stuff. "So, is anyone else gonna be here? asked Danny about 20 minutes later.

Marrissa smiled at me with a naughty smile. "Nope. Just me and you. So, Danny, here's the one million dollar question for you.. truth or dare?"
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Okay well that's all for Chapter one. Feedback, suggestions, or questions would be appreciated. You can either post it, or send me a PM with suggestions. So, is it good, and should I continue? Oh, and if you were wondering, the bet part will be later, maybe in the next chapter.

Person
06-19-2010, 08:31 PM
"Um.. I'll... take a dare," said Danny.

"Good," said Marrissa. "I dare you to strip to your boxers." Not too bad, I thought. I stripped to my boxers, not nervous at all.

"Truth or dare, Marrissa?" She took a dare. "Okay.. then go get a banana and give it a blowjob for about 2 minutes."

"Easy," said Marrissa. "Truth or dare, Danny?" Danny took a dare. "I dare you to take all dares the rest of the game, then!"

"Alright.. truth or dare, Marrissa?"

"Dare. How about we just give eachother dares the whole game?" suggested Marrissa.

"Sure, that sounds good. I dare you to get naked!" After griping a little bit, she finally did.

"Now guess what? You get to get naked too, Danny!" I stripped all my clothes off of me, revealing a boner. Marrissa saw it and teased me for a little bit.

"Okay, then get into the shower with it on cold," I said. After she got out, she was shivering from the cold, still not allowed to put on her clothes.

"Payback time, Danny!" She left the room, and came back with an office clamp. "This is going on that boner of yours, and it will stay until I take it off!" I shuddered a bit, just thinking about the pain. She walked towards me with an evil smile on her face, and clipped it on my cock.

"OWWW!" I screamed in pain.

"Want it off soon?" asked Marrissa.

"YES!!!" I yelled.

"Okay, then come kneel in front of me and beg for it to come off." I went over to her and started begging for her to take it off. After about a minute of begging, she took it off.

"Now give me a blowjob!" I said to Marrissa. She came over to me and started sucking, her groaning until I cummed.

"I'm about done playing truth or dare, for now, Danny," said Marrissa. "Want to just hang out now?"

"Sure, I guess so." So we went and sat down on the couch, and turned on the TV. When she was flipping through channels, we found a basketball game on, an NBA game. It was the L.A. Lakers vs the Boston Celtics. The score was tied, 96 to 96 with about 30 seconds left.

"Celtics are going to win," I said confidently.

"You're crazy! The Lakers are going to win!" said Marrissa. "How about we make a bet on who wins?"

"What kind of bet?" I asked. "Like money or what?"

"Nope," said Marrissa with a naughty smile on her face. "Whoever loses the bet is the other person's slave for the weekend!" We decided on the terms of the bet. The slave was allowed 2 limits. If they fail to complete a task, they must take a punishment that they must do. The master could take pictures, for evidence, and to use as blackmail against them if they are very uncooperative.

"I hope you are ready to be my slave, because I'm going to win!" But as I said that, I was actually very nervous about it. Because, he did not know it, but Marrissa had lots of ideas ready for him.

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That's it for Chapter 2.. comments and feedback would be appreciated.

Person
06-19-2010, 11:07 PM
The Celtics dribbled the ball down the court, and shot it, with about 15 seconds remaining, and they missed it! The Lakers got the ball, and shot a three pointer to win the game at the last second... and... THEY MADE IT! I can't believe it! I'm going to be a slave for a weekend to Marrissa!

"Well, looks like we have a winner!" yelled Marrissa in delight. I groaned, and shook my head in agony. "Let's go over my rules for you, now!" said Marrissa. "You must call me mistress. You will do whatever I say, or you will be punished. And, lastly, you will be my slave until the weekend ends."

"So, since you are my slave now, get over here, now."

"Yes Marri- I mean - Yes Mistress."

"Already, you have broken a rule! This will not be tolerated! Stay here!" yelled Marrissa. She left the room, and soon came back with a bag. She took out a leather whip and whipped me hard on the ass.

"OWW!" I screamed.

"I'm going to keep whipping you, until you don't flinch!" And she did. Now my butt hurt very badly.

"I'm sorry, Mistress," I whimpered.

"And you should be! Now follow me!" I followed her, and she led me into a guest room, that had a dog cage in the middle of it. She threw me into the cage, and locked the door with a padlock. She took out a pair of handcuffs and cuffed me to the cage. She then threw the key somewhere in the room and said, "Hope you can find it!" She left the room, shutting and locking the door on her way out. So now I am in a dog cage naked, locked, and even if I got out of the cage, the door is locked. I am SCREWED! Somehow, I got to sleep in that cage that night. The next morning, she was standing outside my cage. She opened up the door, and uncuffed my hands.

"Put this outfit on now, and get to cleaning," Marrissa said, holding a maid outfit. About an hour later, she told me that I must go to the neighbors house, still with the maid's costume on, and ask if their house needed cleaned. I thought about arguing, but knew it would just get me punished. So I went over to their house. They were both 60 years old, the people living there. They thought I was a real maid and they made me clean the whole house! And then, when I got back to Marrissa's house, I was locked out! So I was left standing there outside, helpless, while people were staring at me!

juicy
06-20-2010, 01:35 AM
lol, maid costume ;)
Great work, keep it up

rdcottman
06-20-2010, 01:26 PM
keep it up, good story so far

will9022
06-20-2010, 04:51 PM
nice story, but is his name Dylan or Danny?

Demon Thief
06-20-2010, 10:01 PM
Great story so far. :D

FetishSolver
06-22-2010, 02:06 PM
She had a Leather whip? And did that TO HER FRIEND?!?!?!?

Thats not very realistic.

But good story none the less.

Nick
06-23-2010, 06:51 PM
This is moving really fast so far if you ask me, try slowing it down. And watch out too, you changed some of your tenses when writing.

seth18
06-24-2010, 10:28 PM
I like this story. It's going a little fast though and there are a few spelling/grammar errors.

One thing that seems unreal to me is the whip & dog cage. How is it in these stories the master/mistress of an unexpected game or bet has whips and good sized cages, etc., etc.?

Oh and let's not forget the maid costume. ;)

EDIT: I just noticed one more thing, He was thrown into a cage, which was the locked, then handcuffed while on opposite sides of a cage?