Slaves Starting Sessions/Scenes/Other

[LilAngel]

So, having a look at the main s/m area, you can see a lot of people reply with words like 'Mistress', 'Master' or 'Your -insert derogatory term here-'.

In real life, I know a lot of people involved in the BDSM/Fetish community would prefer if these terms would be kept out until the scene/ session already starts. Of course, if you want to get involved in BDSM as a lifestyle, it would be a similar thing. (Before a dominant accepts your submission)

As a lifestyle, some couples chooses to not use any honorific at all, or some chooses to only use it when 'playing'. Or some people just have really weird names. The most common rule however, is that the dominant's given name can never be used, even in public.

Also, I know that some submissives thinks it is less submissive if you are not addressing the person 'appropriately', however, I think that most dominants would be fine (in the beginning) with words like "Ms/Mrs/Mr' with the appropriate surname honorific, or 'Sir/ Madam/ Lady'.


Your opinions?

[Master_Emanon]

I would think it depends, I have known hundreds of people in the lifestyle I see there is a distinct difference between submissives, and slaves, many submissives have “innocent” names such as Master or Sirs little kitten, of little girl and things like that, but I find more often then not that slaves tend to have the derogatory names such as slut, cum slut, bitch and things of that nature.

Many of the submissives that I know, (including my two collared slaves) have no problem with their pet names being called in public, but not around family and such. But many of the woman I know, also including my slaves, gets off and enjoys humiliation, and most who enjoy humiliation kink also usually enjoys degradation as well, so when these two things are linked it may turn them on a bit to be called Masters slut, and I also have known many who get tattoos of it and do not try and hide it.

Though usually you will only hear these names called in one of two places, usually in the home or at BDSM events, very rarely would you hear BDSM type of talk in “vanilla” discussions and places. I do agree on the Doms/Master given name never to be used by his submissive or slave in any public or private place, etiquette and a level of respect must be maintained at all times.

And yes you are also correct with the last paragraph, many subs and slaves will normally address Masters and Mistress as Sir and Madam, as a sign of respect but wont refer to them as Master until they have complete or are at least beginning to trust them, as well as if the Master or Dom (Mistress or Domme) have showed them their dominant capabilities, a sub or slave is less likely to respect a Master or Mistress fully if they do not feel they possess the dominate quality.

[Komodo Jones]

I kind of have to disagree with you a littlebit Lil' Angel, although then again I only have one slave, and she always refers to me as master, and I usually refer to her as slave and other derrogatory terms even if we don't have a scene. And since she has completely submitted she once said "I don't really care what you call me, call me whatever you want to." However, my slave is a bit of a different case because when I was putting her through her week trial period before I actually accepted her, about the third day she wanted to address me as Master but I wouldn't let her until she was officially mine. So I don't think she's fine with the terms Mr., or Sir, just Master. I hope I responded to this question right but that's just my slave. As a whole in the BDSM community, I'm not entirely sure.