Ignoring

[Bandit|Queen]

I have heared a number of times Doms say that ignoring their submissive is an excellent punishment. I'm not gana say my views on this one because I'd really like to know what others think.

I've not had it done to me as a punishment and was wondering if others have and what effect it had etc.

[Davros]

I think it's more *boring* than *punishment*. Obviously, I've never had this done, so I'm guessing. But still.

If a slave is ignored, they could do practically anything.

And if they're ignored for a long time, they could get bored and drop being a slave.

[Dare861]

I think it largely depends on both the sub, the Dom, and the relationship.

For a lot of people here, Davros is probably right. Ignoring is basically cutting off the reason why the slave (note the word slave) would even talk to said Dom. In a 'dare slave/Master' relationship, that could lead to boredom which could lead to an early end of the relationship.

I'm sure this isn't what you were refering to.

I can only speak for myself when I say this, but I think that, used correctly, ignoring could be a very useful punishment. I'm personally extremely devoted to my Mistress. If somethings arises where we can't talk, I do get upset. If she were to say, "I'm ignoring you because <blah>," it would probably be a lot worse than any pain punishment or whatnot.

However, like anything, it shouldn't be used in excess, or even then it could still lead to the end of the relationship.

- DareDude

[jaxman]

A Dom ignoring a submissive is an excellent punishment for an extreme failure. i find it difficult to explain the impact this can have on a submissive - i would recommend caution in using this as a punishment, except in the most extenuating circumstance. This consequence should be discussed with the submissive so that they have an opportunity to correct their behavior prior to such a significant punishment being applied.

i wish i was more articulate, maybe some of the more experienced / eloquent members can express this more clearly.

[jaxman]

Quoted from The Fiends Eye:
"For the most extreme cases of disobedience, you can use a temporary removal from your service- a set period of time where the slave is you slave in the future only. This can range from simply setting a timeframe when the slave won't act as a slave to you, to a complete block on contact for that time."

Wonderful article on Punishment and Discipline
http://www.getdare.com/bbs/showthread.php?t=7873

[spanx6]

I would get bored if someone ignored me. I would find another master.

[≈ Wedgies ≈]

Exactly, what Davros said, if you ignore your slave possibly for too long then it would stop being your slave. Simple as that.

[oreo_is_back]

It's a good punishment, if you have patience. Unfortunately I do not have patience for a Master to ignore me. Infact I demand attention. But when it happens, when it did happen rather, it cut extremely deeper then anticipated. =( He would not talk to me for like a week or something, made me think of what i did, and beg for his attention. Hmpf!

[Bandit|Queen]

Ok now for my 2 pennies worth :)

I do not agree with this form of punishment at all. Maybe because me M/s relationship is not online based anymore, but if my Master ignored me I would walk. No matter what I had done, I would be crushed and don't think that I could do anything as his submissive to deserve that. The only thing would be cheating but that would not be a M/s issue that is more a relationship one.

I think it is far worse to take away things they like. For example if Master stopped calling me by my pet names. I think this would all but drive me to tears as it is something that I really love and something that makes me feel special. Take that away and I would panic and learn fast!

Ignoring is something you use with a dog not a person. It doesn't work in my opinion. As others have said you get bored and eventually walk away. Corner time is a great way to punish me or to know my Master is disappointed. I just think ignoring is cold and does not address the issues.

[Fiendish]

Ignoring is a bad word, I think. The way I see it, taking away a slave's duties and removable items(mine like her rope very much... it hurt when I had to take it away) is more the appropriate term. Now, this is obviously not perminant, though I have found it very effective in the past.

It also depends on the person. If they're in it just for a kinky time and play, then this may not be very effective. If they're in it for more than just the kink, it may be very effective.

There is no absolute in this world... that's why it's so much fun :)

[Zeromus]

Ok now for my 2 pennies worth :)

I do not agree with this form of punishment at all. Maybe because me M/s relationship is not online based anymore, but if my Master ignored me I would walk. No matter what I had done, I would be crushed and don't think that I could do anything as his submissive to deserve that. The only thing would be cheating but that would not be a M/s issue that is more a relationship one.

I think it is far worse to take away things they like. For example if Master stopped calling me by my pet names. I think this would all but drive me to tears as it is something that I really love and something that makes me feel special. Take that away and I would panic and learn fast!

Ignoring is something you use with a dog not a person. It doesn't work in my opinion. As others have said you get bored and eventually walk away. Corner time is a great way to punish me or to know my Master is disappointed. I just think ignoring is cold and does not address the issues.

I pity any animals associated with you.

[Knots101]

I could see ignoring over one day and saying "I have not the time for your trouble tonight" and leaving to talk to other people or whatever will really set in the slaves mind that he/she is in big trouble. and one night is most defintially a long enough time for them to think if not then the problem is very serious and can not be handled with a punishment untill the slave is delt with by confronting them.

[Bandit|Queen]

I pity any animals associated with you.

lol I'm doing a degree in animal management :D It's what you do, if a dog is constantly trying to get on your lap when you don't want it to your turn you back on it and ignore it. They panic because there attention seeking behavior isn't working. You shouting at the dog is a game to them, so just turning you back is the best thing to do. It's what other animals in a pack would do. I don't mean not feed it or take it for walks etc. It's something you only do for a few mins.

Ignoring is a bad word, I think. The way I see it, taking away a slave's duties and removable items(mine like her rope very much... it hurt when I had to take it away) is more the appropriate term. Now, this is obviously not perminant, though I have found it very effective in the past.


Well actually no it is a good word to use because that is what I meant. Taking away privileges etc is not ignoring them it's something else. I have herd plenty of Doms online say that ignoring a sub for up to a week in some cases is one of the best ways to punish. I mean no contact at all. That is just ignoring not taking away ownership marks or something.

You may not use ignoring to punish but it seems plenty do. So in this case ignoring is the right term I think :)

[Tom]

I feel a true submissive should respect their master/mistress' decision to ignore them, this can be extremely difficult, and im sure it can build alot of anxiety up in the slave. I suppose it would test their true loyalty, im sure most submissives would walk away from this, but a submissive can not always recieve pleasure from their owner in a day to day life. Should it really be such hard frustrating work for the owner?

[Bandit|Queen]

I feel a true submissive should respect their master/mistress' decision to ignore them, this can be extremely difficult, and im sure it can build alot of anxiety up in the slave. I suppose it would test their true loyalty, im sure most submissives would walk away from this, but a submissive can not always recieve pleasure from their owner in a day to day life. Should it really be such hard frustrating work for the owner?

So if you were having problems with your wife or gf you would just ignore them? Can't see it solving any problems at all personally. To me ignoring is a way to just avoid problems instead of address them. Maybe I'm not a "true" submissive then :D

[Tom]

I wasn't talking about avoiding problems, I meant simply on a punishment level. I'd have thought being ignored for a length of time by a dominant person would build up a lot of anxiety from a submissive, it would perhaps create feelings of resentment, and once the dominant person addressed there slave again they would feel ever more fulfilled by the presence of their master.

In different contexts ignoring someone can have different effects. Ignoring a problem is not at all the same thing.