Old 08-13-2009, 09:41 PM   #1
MasFresco
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Default Ye Olde TorD

I've read many stories on getdare and finally musted up the courage to write my own. I hope you enjoy.

There was one a royal prince. This prince was as one in the fairytales, with long blonde hair that flowed magnificently in the wind. His physique was impeccable, with a barrel chest and arms that made women swoon, and a good 6 feet in height. His name was Arclius.

But this story isn’t about him. No, it is about his squire Michael. A comparatively unimpressive man, but if not standing next to the prince, was a good 5’9” and with a slightly defined chest and arms. He had since a child wanted to be a knight, but was born a slave to the royal family. He tolerated the prince and his massive ego, and even considered him a strange kind of friend. The prince saw if fit one day to free him and to adopt him as his squire.

But anyway, on to the story.

One day Arclius and Michael were on their way back from a false alarm in one of the nearby villages. A long and boring trip back and forth, so prince decided to strike up a conversation to pass the time.

“Michael, what sort of return celebration do you thing there will be when we return?”

“I don’t know sir, but I’m sure I will be grand.” Rolling his eyes as he said this.

“I’m sure the women will be lining up for me to bed them…” Now off in his own little world.

Not long after a frantic screams of a woman and the sounds of struggling could be heard.

“A fair maiden in peril? Come Michael, we’re off!”

They followed the sound to the source, and to their surprise they found a band of ogres all huddled over something. They weren’t surprised to see them, but they were surprised to see so many working together, as ogres were usually solitary creatures.

In the middle of the huddle there was the source of the screams. A beauty in an almost royal purple garb. She had a head full of red fiery hair, and a body that any man would kill for.

Arclius took up his sword and charged, with Michael right behind him, into the clearing yelling “Foul beasts! Release her immediately!”

One of the ogres turned around and pointed at the prince. It then said something to its comrades and they all burst into a hearty laughter.

Arclius did not like being laughed at. He then made a charge at the ogre, swinging his sword wildly.
The ogre blocked his attack easily and then gave him a backhand slap, knocking him out cold.
The sword had fallen near Michael’s feet. He picked it up and held it as taught.
The ogres laughed harder at this, and one of then advanced without his weapon. A dire mistake.
As the ogre took a swing at him and Michael dodged under the creature’s massive fist. He then took a swing with all his might and cut the creature's arm clean off. The surprised ogre, while holding his now stump of an arm, told his comrades to drop the girl and flee. They complied and disappeared into the trees.

The girl, currently unconscious, was lying now in the middle of the clearing. Michael went to her side to check if she was harmed. There were a few cuts and bruises, but nothing serious. He took the opportunity to marvel at her beauty. She was one of the maiden the songs were sung about.

Then she awoke with a start and started thrashing about. He then said “The ogres have been scared off, you are in no danger now.” This seemed to relieve her. He asked “May I know your name maiden?” She blushed and said in a voice of much beauty “My name is Salandria. May I know the name of my savior?”
“My name is Michael, and that useless lout is Arclius.”
She looked at the still senseless prince and giggled.
“Well Michael, in order to thank you properly, I invite you and your friend to my family’s home for a supper and a bed for the night.”
“I would be honored Salandria.” Michael said.
-------------------------------------------
As stated my first story. I'm open to critism, so be mean and nasty. Tell me what you didn't like and how to improve on it.
I won't take anything personally.

Last edited by MasFresco; 08-14-2009 at 01:56 PM.
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Old 08-13-2009, 10:51 PM   #2
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GREAT START! This is an amazing start, I cannot see any grammar errors, YET, and I'm dieing to read more! Of course it has notthing to do with TorD, YET, I'm sure it will in the next installment and is still an amazing start!
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Old 08-13-2009, 11:04 PM   #3
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It's certainly not the classic truth or dare story, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Very original for this site. I don't believe I've seen anything like this yet, and I look forward to reading the next installments.
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Old 08-14-2009, 10:08 AM   #4
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It was nice, but I think you should check spelling and grammer before posting.

Otherwise I liked it
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Old 08-14-2009, 11:07 AM   #5
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Thank you for your supportive comments. The Truth or Dare is soon to come. In the next installment or so. I didn't want to put the game in right away as I thought it would be boring.
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Last edited by MasFresco; 08-14-2009 at 11:33 AM.
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Old 08-14-2009, 02:22 PM   #6
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Wow. This is an excellent start. I hope that you continue to write it. Bravo for creating something new and fresh and creative, that doesn't have the same-old classic plot where everyone has sex in the first part or so. (Which I'm guilty of myself...hmm...)

Thank you for an incredible beginning to a fantastic(al) story!
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