Old 05-31-2012, 05:12 PM   #1
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Default What makes a good slave?

Master and I are a repeating cycle of fighting, denying, me promising and then making up. I really do want to be a good slave for him, I want this to last for some time. I've given up a lot for him, I guess I figured worldy possessions and habits would make up for me not completely giving my pride an mind to him. I'm starting to learn how to let it go, a mindless puppet more or less. I guess it's just my dumb pride, he's given me one more chance and I'm really thankful. So I want to be the best I can be.

Any tips? What in your mind are traits every slave should have. How they should act, ect.
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Old 05-31-2012, 06:45 PM   #2
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Well, they should know its not all about sex, and its not about pleasing slave. Other then that it tends to vary... Some like mindless puppets others do not, It really varies on slave and Owner, Really besides slave suppose to please Owner their really no right one answer.

Trust between Owner and slave is earned over time and anything else just varies on the two.
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Old 05-31-2012, 06:56 PM   #3
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This is just a snippet from my ad. Hopefully it will help.

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A submissive should understand that and do his/her job of being as respectful to anyone as much as possible rather they are his/her Master or not by calling them sir or Master. Listening is also very important part of being a submissive. When Master gives his/her slave strict instruction, he/she should never give the Master any excuse to why that task could not be done, assuming is follows the limits. If the submissive should have a reason, then she should inform the Master ahead of time before the task is due. While all of the above things are important aspects of being a submissive, a submissive should love and respect his/her Master, as that is what really brings the Sub and Dom together.
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Old 05-31-2012, 10:12 PM   #4
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I know it's gonna suck to here this but just say yes even of you do not want to do it. Then after you do the task talk to him about it. It's honestly not that hard. If you trust him you will be fine as in living and breathing in the next hour. However if you don't trust him don't bother anymore because he isn't the right person for you then.
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Old 06-01-2012, 12:50 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by Lauren10 View Post
I know it's gonna suck to here this but just say yes even of you do not want to do it. Then after you do the task talk to him about it. It's honestly not that hard. If you trust him you will be fine as in living and breathing in the next hour. However if you don't trust him don't bother anymore because he isn't the right person for you then.
Ok, for one, DON'T do that. Never just say "yes" to demands your Master gives. That will lead to stressing on your part and will only make things worse.

To be a good sub:
1. Know your likes/limits/dislikes/loves. Know how things might effect you. (ex. I enjoy being called dirty names, but I absolutely light up when my Master calls me his princess.)

2. Be a pure sub. Do not do something just because you are told to. Submissives are submissive not because we are a lower class of person. It is because something inside of us enjoys fully knowing we have pleased our Doms. So as I said before, never just say yes because your Dom gave you a task. Think about the task first.

3. Don't be a "forced" sub. You should be submissive because you enjoy it and you want to do it. Any friction in that area will cause problems in the relationship.

Now this is NOT how to be the perfect sub. There are no set of rules to make the one perfect sub. Every Master perfers something different. Know your Master, be not only his sub, but also his friend. Communication is key in D/s. It is not all about "you do this, while i watch". It is a relationship.
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Old 06-01-2012, 03:37 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by minimarshmellow View Post
Ok, for one, DON'T do that. Never just say "yes" to demands your Master gives. That will lead to stressing on your part and will only make things worse.

To be a good sub:
1. Know your likes/limits/dislikes/loves. Know how things might effect you. (ex. I enjoy being called dirty names, but I absolutely light up when my Master calls me his princess.)

2. Be a pure sub. Do not do something just because you are told to. Submissives are submissive not because we are a lower class of person. It is because something inside of us enjoys fully knowing we have pleased our Doms. So as I said before, never just say yes because your Dom gave you a task. Think about the task first.

3. Don't be a "forced" sub. You should be submissive because you enjoy it and you want to do it. Any friction in that area will cause problems in the relationship.

Now this is NOT how to be the perfect sub. There are no set of rules to make the one perfect sub. Every Master perfers something different. Know your Master, be not only his sub, but also his friend. Communication is key in D/s. It is not all about "you do this, while i watch". It is a relationship.
She said Slave not SUB read the post... That's what you do if you are a sub however what I said was in regards for a slave which is clearly labeled in the title of the post.
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Old 06-01-2012, 04:20 PM   #7
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She said Slave not SUB read the post... That's what you do if you are a sub however what I said was in regards for a slave which is clearly labeled in the title of the post.
This is true; however, to be a good slave, you must first be a good sub. Even in the case of slave, you never say yes to everything. If your Master said to cut off your arm and eat it, would you?

I think not. My point being, saying yes to everything leads to danger. If you learn to be a good sub first, it makes you a better slave.
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Old 06-01-2012, 04:55 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by minimarshmellow View Post
This is true; however, to be a good slave, you must first be a good sub. Even in the case of slave, you never say yes to everything. If your Master said to cut off your arm and eat it, would you?

I think not. My point being, saying yes to everything leads to danger. If you learn to be a good sub first, it makes you a better slave.
Ok... but you are still trying to put down my argument without actually comprehending it, which is annoying. I stated at the end " If you trust him you will be fine as in living and breathing in the next hour. However if you don't trust him don't bother anymore because he isn't the right person for you then."
Also I would LOVE to here a true story on how your near impossible senario happened.
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Old 06-01-2012, 06:08 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by Lauren10 View Post
Ok... but you are still trying to put down my argument without actually comprehending it, which is annoying. I stated at the end " If you trust him you will be fine as in living and breathing in the next hour. However if you don't trust him don't bother anymore because he isn't the right person for you then."
Also I would LOVE to here a true story on how your near impossible senario happened.
No, I do fully comprehend your argument. You say basically, if you trust him just do what he says. Your argument is invalid. It is impossible to have a good true D/s relationship without trust. That example is a bit extreame, but it is a great example why you should never just say yes to everything. Majority of Doms like for their sub/slave/pet to think about task that they do and not just blindly say yes to everything.
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Old 06-01-2012, 08:49 PM   #10
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I agree with mini. One of the things about an online relationship with a dom is that they aren't there to see be able to really see how things are affecting you, so sometimes they may give you a task that they think you should be able to do but in reality there are other things going on that prevent that from happening. I trust my Dom but there are still times when I tell him that I'm not going to do something. You should be able to communicate with your master when something doesn't feel safe or possible for you to do. It's never safe to blindly follow someone, no matter the level of trust there is in the relationship.

That's my opinion anyway.
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Old 06-01-2012, 09:46 PM   #11
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My former Master and I were on really good levels with this, as should any D/s relationship be.

He explained this to me numerous times, and it always, always made sense. A Master and a slave are the two sides of a coin. Both are necessary to complete the other, and neither is greater or lesser in value.

Never, EVER, think you have to say "yes" to absolutely everything. That is a huge no no. There were many times with my Master that he would ask me to do something I wouldn't be comfortable with. He would try to encourage me, and there are times that I would do exactly as he says. But if there was ever a moment when I felt firmly of my beliefs, I would stick to my "no", and leave it at that.

Most Masters/Mistresses don't want a push over slave anyways. A doormat is never a good thing to be no matter what sort of life you live. They quite often would much rather have someone who can and will challenge them from time to time. Things are never entertaining if it's just "yes yes yes, whatever you wish", for both people involved.
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Old 06-02-2012, 03:37 PM   #12
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As always what follows are my personal feelings and opinions about the matter and may not agree with those of anyone else.

For me a good slave needs certain qualities.

First she must have a real desire to be controlled.

She must want to learn from her Master how to be a better slave and how to please him specifically.

She must be prepared to submit to his methods and discipline when necessary.

Finally she must be happy and fulfilled in serving her Master.

All of these things are the responsibility of any slave. if you cannot find these qualities and abilities withing you then you will have trouble as a slave. if you think you lack any of them then you may need to work to acquire them.

Of course this is not an exhaustive list but it covers the basics.



As I and others have stated before, I do not equate slave and sub, they are not the same.

You are all, of course free to disagree with anything or everything I have said.
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Old 06-02-2012, 08:17 PM   #13
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Interesting. I'll share my views too.

Michie, Clowe and me have been practicing consensual relationship between ourselves.

It is not wrong that a being a slave must obey and everything but that all goes in the agreement between us.

Being mindless within the stated agreement is fine. But you gotta think thrice when it gets out of the agreement. Part of our agreement place me in the safe zone where I won't be socially and/or publicly defamed, physically abuse and/or mentally stressed out.* To put it simply, I am free to continue my daily lifestyle without worries despite our relationship.

*Note: Physically abuse and/or mentally stressed out is ambiguous and it had gotten out of hand a couple of times. It crosses the fine line between slaving and abuse, resulting in mental issues such as, uncontrollable anxiety and fear if not handled well.

Using my experience as an example... I was literally getting physical abuse from Michie (you know, punched, kicked, slapping and hair pulling like how domestic violence are) after I pissed Michie off in real life issues. It was all an abrupt happening and I lost control mentally. I was running a lapse of neurotic defence mechanism. You know, rambling nonsense, changing topic out of nowhere, smiling whilst crying, bla bla.

In short, your Master and you have to be aware of this. Things can go really wrong if not done well. *



Traits.. Every individuals has their own traits and they act according to what's happening and of courses, fetishes and what pleases them. But I guess "acting" is the core of being a more fulfilling slave.

For example, when a master waves to me to go to him/her, I ran to him/her like how a puppy will run when it is being called out for. And when punished, I dragged my feet sulkily and feeling upset about my wrongdoings.

Apart from it, I display my emotions truthfully at all times in their presence. When I'm happy, I'll keep a smile, dance, skip, et cetera. When I'm sad, I am listless, not attending to him much. When I'm horny, I play with myself uncontrollably or giving soft moans to her just to hint her when I can't really touch myself outdoors. There's a lot more than just these but it gotta take a lot of practice and embarrassment. Since we are all living in this betchy society, people are definitely gonna laugh at your weird actions outdoors. But hey, it's my life and I'm not bothering you so ignore them if you can.

Lastly, getting a little educated on psychology helps in such relationships.

That's all I got in my mind thus far. I hope I answer you well!
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Old 06-03-2012, 09:28 AM   #14
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What makes a good Slave? (Or a good Dominant, for that matter)

Communication.

As self-evident or outright weird as that may sound - after all, it's such a simple statement - bare with me, because the simplicity here is deceptive.

Communication needs to be meaningful and mutual if it is to affect a relationship in any way. After all, misunderstandings will occur - no ifs or buts about that. There is no possible way for two people to understand each other perfectly if they do not communicate and communicate -well-.

Try to be concise, clear, to the point and open. Try not to talk in riddles or to get your point across by inferring it. And yes, you are free to expect other people to do the same.

From good communication comes trust, and trust is a valuable commodity. It will make it easier to submit, to dominate, to allow people near or past your usual boundaries; note that i do not use the word limits for a reason here.

With boundaries, i mean more those places where one is vulnerable to some degree or another - when you can trust someone not to abuse your vulnerabilities, it makes it easier for someone to be close to you and to feel closer to someone. We all have things we accept from certain people while we'd beat the seven colors of excrement out of everybody else for simply trying to say the exact same things. This is natural.

Noone, barring noone is perfectly invulnerable. To make oneself invulnerable is a dangerous thing - after all, if we can't feel we can't be touched and if we can't be touched, then what's the point of the whole excersize to begin with?

Opening up to others can be a difficult thing to do. Allowing people into our boundaries, letting people past our defences - they're scary things.

Trusting someone means having an easier time to let them in.

But without communication, there's no trust.

So - in my opinion - communication does not only make for better slaves (and Dominants) - but put simply, good communication makes for a better relationship.
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Old 06-05-2012, 04:29 AM   #15
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I will say 2 words to sum up my thoughts, simply because I'm not in the mood for writing out something long.

Honesty.
Communication.

2 Aspects that should be the foundation to any good sub and dom.
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