Old 06-08-2010, 04:26 AM   #16
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I read your story. However I prefer not to comment.
I love the irony. Thanks for reading though

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i love the narration. keep up the good work.
Thankyou ^^

I'll probably post the next part on Thursday or Friday
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Old 06-08-2010, 05:32 AM   #17
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Yay this is awesome.
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Old 06-08-2010, 08:19 AM   #18
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Yay this is awesome.
*is glad the Star approves*

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Old 06-10-2010, 05:17 AM   #19
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HONESTY PREVAILS, ADVENTURE BEGINS

Upon his return, Tom’s face changed with the wind from a daringly happy portrait to a shocked, horrified horror movie. Staring at the spot in which his clothes once lay, he started to panic as he frantically looked around, dashing to the edge of the woodland in the hope of catching the culprit. No such luck. His face started to glow red and his mind started to race (and won the 100m gold medal it was that fast).

Meanwhile, a cheeky devil in the nearby bush was smirking to herself, carefully watching this little lost soul dive around for anything to save him. Nothing. She had a nosy into the bag for a moment before realising her actions and the consequence. Tom was a nice guy. They’d never even spoken before. Yet here she was clutching his clothes in the middle of a park in broad daylight. Him being caught would be horrific and he’d never live the shame down. She suddenly felt cruel and decided to put him out of his misery.

She slowly stood up. If she’d had an arts and crafts bag, she’d have delicately created a little white flag to signal surrender. But, alas, she didn’t. The bag held in one hand, she took to her feet and faced Tom. For a brief moment, he failed to spot her. However, his eyes soon fixed upon this devious girl.

His response was that of some nervous laughter, a touch of anger and the odd tear rolling from his eye. I’d recount the spoken part of this story but it was muffled and full of swear words, so I better not. All you need to know is that Tom was pissed off, but more relieved at this happening. And, sure enough, Gaby felt much happier, calmer in fact. For a moment, she paused. She knew this was what Kate had probably planned and, so far, it’d gone quite well. So far so good.

“Gaby,” he stuttered, quickly whipping his boxers around his waist.

“Hey Tom,” she giggled.

This was their real first conversation of importance and so the atmosphere was quite awkward. Also, do remember they were in the middle of a park in daylight and one of them was stood in his undies. Not exactly the best first date. Well, it might be. Depends how you look at it really. The way Kate looked at it was, well, erected. I mean, erm, yeah. Sorry.

Tom glanced down and realised the display of excitement within his lower regions. Diverting his eyes back to Gaby’s, he swiftly moved a hand to cover his ever-growing ... man-bump.

“Nice –”

“Oi,” he interrupted, half-laughing.

“Look, this wasn’t my idea at all, Tom, I promise. My friend Kate set this up.”
She decided the truth was the best policy.

“Kate who?” Tom demanded.

“Well, put it this way. She said you’d understand better if I told you she was called Mistress K.”

Tom’s eyes widened and his face, once again, dropped.

“getDare?” Tom whispered, looking down for a second.

“That’s the one. This morning, I had no idea such a site existed. Believe me. Then Kate told me all about this dare and how could I resist a sneak peek? And anyway—”

“I’ll kill her!”

“I rather think it for the best if she remains alive and well, to be honest. But seriously. You’re stood there in your undies when you could’ve gotten dressed. Shock, or are you quite comfortable?”

She had a point.

Tom wasted no time in grabbing the clothes from the plastic bag and replacing them back on his body. Gaby released a small, innocent giggle as he bent down to slide the pants around his knees. Oh, how she was tempted to give him a cheeky spank. But she didn’t want to push it, so she stopped herself. A minute later, and Tom was dressed. Apart from the blushing face he held, you’d never think anything dirty had happened. It looked like any ordinary meeting of friends. And this gave Gaby an idea.

“Like doing things in secret, eh, Tom?”

“Honestly? Gives me a buzz,” he replied, casually ruffling his hair back into shape. “Why?”

For a second, Gabriella said nothing. Her eyes gazed into Tom’s and the silence was bliss. However, the next four words pivoted the story in a very new direction.

“Fancy coming to mine?”
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Old 06-10-2010, 11:12 AM   #20
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This story is BEAUTIFUL! I also love your narration style, adding in a outsiders perspective on the events of Gaby and Tom.

Just one thing I'd like to say - Don't stop writing!
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Old 06-10-2010, 02:06 PM   #21
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I read your story. However I prefer not to comment.
that doesnt make much sense. whats the point of commenting only about the fact that you dont like to comment?
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Old 06-10-2010, 02:10 PM   #22
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that doesnt make much sense. whats the point of commenting only about the fact that you dont like to comment?
Irony is beautiful.

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Originally Posted by balderdash View Post
This story is BEAUTIFUL! I also love your narration style, adding in a outsiders perspective on the events of Gaby and Tom.

Just one thing I'd like to say - Don't stop writing!
Thanks. Glad you're enjoying it!
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Old 06-11-2010, 01:55 PM   #23
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STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN

Twenty-four minutes and five seconds later (I counted), Tom’s left foot stepped over the threshold of Gaby’s house and through her front door. With her mum at work and her brother at his friends for a couple of days, she happily allowed him public entry and guided him to the kitchen. Gaby offered him a seat and a drink. As she poured two glasses of water, she read the note her mum had left her. A free house until 6pm. Handy. But what would she do until then? (Stopping the tap would’ve been a start as she over-filled the first cup.)

Tom remained silent, still a little stunned and unknowing of what exactly he should do. He knew one thing though; he wouldn’t be complaining.

“So,” started Gaby, breaking the silence.

“Nice house,” he said, awkwardly diverting his mouth to take a sip of the fresh cool water.

“Thanks. Best bit’s upstairs,” she giggled, realising what she’d just suggested moments after.

“I’m like that – always speaking before thinking,” he comforted her slightly.

She laughed.

“To tell you the truth,” Gaby began, “I don’t, like, have any plans. I thought I’d get to spy on you and then come home. Just a bit of fun. Dunno.”

“Well, seeing as we’re here now and what’s done is done, how about we both chill for a bit and I’ll introduce you to getDare a bit more?”

“Sounds like a plan,” she said, placing her cup on the side. “This way!”

Teasing as she did so, she slowly walked upstairs with a slightly excited Tom close behind. However, he kept his distance so as to catch a brief glimpse (I apologise if I overuse that pun, but it’s so hard not to use) of her unmentionables. Sure enough, the skirt waved a little and allowed his eyes to catch sight of the little red thong but, before he could process this image into a kinky thought, he was at the top of the stairs and back to eye-level with Gaby.

Turning to her left, she directed Tom into the pinkest room in the house. The dwelling place of an angel.
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Old 06-12-2010, 01:58 AM   #24
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EMBRACE AND ACCEPT

She threw herself on her bed and plugged her laptop power cable in, flicking the switch to turn it on. He stumbled in, gawping at the amount of cuddly teddies and pink items around the room. Over a good ten minutes or so as she flicked into her Internet connection, they started to bond more and they clicked almost instantly (like two correct jigsaw pieces, or like two incorrect jigsaw pieces after applying a good amount of glue).

They decided Gaby should sign up to getDare, so Tom helped as she did so. Her username, in the end, “MissGaby”. Cheeky. As she entered her username to confirm, she gave a slight knowing look to Tom who raised an eyebrow slightly. Immediately, she clicked into Tom’s profile.

“Four hundred and fifty posts?”

“I get bored.”

She giggled and sifted through them, eyeing up anything that might tickle her fancy. Truths, truths, game postings, website suggestions, truths, the SM forum. Ah, now. Interesting. Obviously, due to being under getDare’s age restriction, he couldn’t post in the SM forum. But he was perfectly allowed to post in the SM Lounge/Ideas section, and he had done. Several times. Tom grabbed for the laptop but Gaby flung it away and turned to face him.

“Nuh-uh!”

She giggled her cheeky giggle with a cheeky grin between her blushing cheeks.

Five minutes of dead silence. Then, as Tom looked around carefully studying Gabriella’s abode, the laptop lid in front of him began to close downward, Gaby’s face appearing above the rim. His eyes turned to fix upon her and her ever-enhancing grin.

“I see,” she began. “You’re a submissive, eh?”

“Well, erm,” he mumbled.

“No need to be shy. Just a question. And besides, I’m totally new to all this so I’m hardly able to, like, do anything.”

“Then, well, yeah. I’ve always sorta liked it and this site’s opened up the chance for me to be a ...”

“A slave,” she finished for him.

Tom nodded, his eyes narrowly avoiding hers.

“Tell me more,” she said, shuffling up to Tom and placing her arm around him. “Don’t be shy.”

He told her. The whole story. From the day he was dared to show his 13-year-old penis to a group of girls, right through til the present moment being sat upon Gaby’s bed. She embraced every word, understanding his desires and learning as she went along. She wasn’t stupid – she had an idea of what SM was and how it worked, but she wanted to know from Tom’s point of view specifically.

Prior to this conversation, Gabriella had no idea that the attractive guy across the refectory at college was into such kinky acts. Nobody else in college knew either, except her now. So, the obvious happened.
“How would you feel if I offered to explore SM with you?”

No faffing. She gave the question.
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Old 06-12-2010, 01:22 PM   #25
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You have such a talent for writting like The Doctor, I can acually hear Matt Smith's voice in my head
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Old 06-12-2010, 02:03 PM   #26
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You have such a talent for writting like The Doctor, I can acually hear Matt Smith's voice in my head
I'm not trying to write like the Doctor but I'll definitely take that to be a compliment I think the narrator is a little similar in that he's a little wacky and always butting in though.
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Old 06-13-2010, 02:16 PM   #27
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Brilliant story, the pace and characterisation are perfect!
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Old 06-13-2010, 02:26 PM   #28
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Brilliant story, the pace and characterisation are perfect!
Thankyou. Glad you like it ^^
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