Old 03-17-2014, 11:42 AM   #1
Vexus
Member
 
Vexus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: In my rightful place above the rest of you miserable peons.
Posts: 41
Blog Entries: 7
Information The Great Chat Debate

Introduction With Requisite Jovial Banter
For all of you that don't know me, I feel very sorry for you and I hope to organize a charity dedicated towards educating you on exactly how sad your life is without me.

For all of you that do know me, I would hope that my reputation for being fairly (fairly) level-headed and possessing genius (yes, I know it's downplayed) intellect precedes me.
That said, I request that you set aside any bias, earned or unearned while reading this thread.

TL;DR: I'm amazing. You know it. If you don't know it, you will.

Original Argument

Chat room frequenters nowadays have all experienced being told that they need to get on topic while in the BDSM room. Now I'll be honest, originally I was very skeptic of the logic behind it and voiced privately questions such as:

"What's the point of the room if it's dead more than half the time without the off topic conversation?"

or

"Can people not multi-task and mix kinky, BDSM stuff with casual stuff?"


or

"Why do we have a room where the mid- to end-game of the purpose of the room is concluded in private chat?"

or

"Who cares?"


Well, I'm sorry for those that thought that my questions made sense (which they always do.) I have to do a 180 and disagree with everything I just said.

TL;DR: Epiphany!

Bias Disclaimer

Ultimately, power is power and here the mods have it. This isn't to put the mods in a negative light. The rules are the rules and while they may make some, they are truly there to enforce pre-existing rules.

A similar example would be district judges in your county (for those that live in the states.) Whether the judge agrees or disagrees with the results of your case, ultimately they must abide by the State and Federal statutes. If the legislation should be changed, then you usually have to go to the top a.k.a the State or Federal Supreme Court.

Much in the same way, the mods don't really have the authority to spontaneously change rules that you as well as they disagree with it.


TL;DR: Mods have their hands tied, lay off 'em.

Counter Argument

Previous words stated, it occurred to me that there really isn't any reason not to go to the appropriate chat rooms. In fact, what we are witnessing now is simply the Follow-The-Pack mentality. gDers look at the window and see 0 in the Lounge, 0 in Truth or Dare, 1 (yea... that guy) in The Scene and then 30 in BDSM. Obviously, if you're in a chat room, you're looking to chat with someone and unfortunately for that guy in the Scene, you're going to be lonely for a while.

Now, I've noticed rising disgruntlement between both mods, elite members and casual joes concerning the chat rooms and I've come up with a few solutions although I'm sure there's bound to be better ones. (Ones that I've obviously thought of but just haven't put here, of course.)

Solution #3
A dedicated group of gDers consistently linger in the Lounge regardless of how boring it may seem. Eventually people would gravitate there when the generally boring, single-digit IQ members spam the BDSM room with "pls be my mistress evn tho my age is wrong n im obvi underage andi dun no nothing 'bout being a sub."

Don't believe me? If you stay there while all the good company leaves, you'll experience a true test of patience.

Solution #2
If you don't use the lounge for any other reason, use it so that you're not constantly being reminded by mods to edit your conversation. The Lounge is the Lounge. This means generally Everything can be discussed here, including BDSM. (I'll regret saying this when the Lounge gets spammed with BDSM adverts and I get pms from the mods saying "Thanks, see what you did?")
This means that really as long as the conversation is appropriate (the meaning of which on a site like this is extremely broad), a mod shouldn't have any reason to confront you and you can go on talking about how you think purple panties are better than green ones while discussing the current week's football game.


TL;DR: Anything can be discussed in the Lounge, virtually no restrictions, why not?

Solution #1

This is for the mods and those above them that can accomplish it. When you click TorD Chat, have it automatically redirect people to the Lounge (With a reasonably visible notification that they are in the Lounge and certain behaviors would be more appropriate elsewhere). From there, people can change themselves to the room that suits their needs.

This way, the Lounge should consistently have a higher member count than the other rooms keeping those that just want to chat here, and those that just want to fap there.

Conclusion

The unfortunate reality is the issue that we've seen fit to focus on now is a result of 2 things. 1.) Our community is diverse and mixed in casual and bdsm 2.) The chat community is not large enough to necessitate the 4 rooms we have now, nor are the conditions of those rooms specific or clear enough to prevent confusion.

Once we get more people, we may find that we develope more distinct cliques that will be dedicated to each room until we have a point where the membership in each is more or less the same.

Thanks for reading and feel free to share your thoughts and ignore my atrocious grammar and spelling. If you point out a spelling or grammar mistake, I'll correct it in exchange for a nude picture of yourself with Vexus written across your chest. So think carefully... Is it worth it?

Hope to see you all soon in the Lounge!


The Great, All Powerful, and Deliciously Sexy
Vexus
If this isn't in the correct place, I apologize and appreciate whichever mod moves it.
__________________
~Angels are bright still, though the brightest fell.~



Dom 93%|Sadist 89%|Experimental 86%|Switch 57%|Masochist 57%|BDSM 46%|Exhibitionist/Voyeur 43%|Sub 39%|Degradation 18%|Vanilla

Last edited by Vexus; 03-17-2014 at 11:47 AM.
Vexus is offline   Reply With Quote
The following 3 users say Thank You to Vexus for this post:
Old 03-17-2014, 01:45 PM   #2
Red
Sona Forever
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,146
Default

I'm just going to add two little things:

1. The only things that aren't allowed in the lounge are asking for dares and advertising for masters/mistresses/slave/whatever, those spam messages belong in the BDSM Exchange room. But if they occur in the Lounge, then we can easily kick them and they tend to learn very quickly to keep it in the BDSM Exchange room.

2. Until rather recently, people were automatically dropped into the Lounge upon joining chat but we had depp change it in order to see if that would help people to use the correct room. The complaint use to be "I didn't know which room I was in" when we would ask someone to keep their ads in the BDSM room, so we made it so they had to choose the room and only they could be blamed for using the rooms in the wrong fashion.
Red is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2014, 01:51 PM   #3
OneMoreTime
getDare Sweetheart
 
OneMoreTime's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 291
Default

Ill also add a bit. might as well also shamelessly mention the suggestions post that i made not too long ago here. http://www.getdare.com/bbs/showthread.php?t=171695 which kinda points to the same thing as you are saying.

people chat for 1 of 3(4) reasons.
1a) to ... chat. about ... stuff. duh?
1b) to chat more specifically about BDSM related stuff
2) to screw around and play games with eachother
3) to spam ads, wait a little while, and then coming back to spam ads again.

We have the rooms to accommodate this, i just think they could use a bit of a name change and the descriptions updated to better reflect what the rooms are for. but more importantly, a change to keep adspam and conversation seperate.

and just imagine if there was a room dedicated to "ad spam?" a room that autofilled out a form similar to what the slave/master area forum thread does. every time someone posts it could make it look like:
[age][sex] looking for [sex][25-50 characters to give details of what you are looking for]
and leave ALL actual CONVERSATION to either the lounge, or another other room designed for conversation.

It also wouldnt be terrible to hide the number of people in the adspam room so people dont see that there are 20 people afk in there, and join expecting it to be better for chatting than the 5 people in the lounge who are ACTUALLY talking.
OneMoreTime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2014, 03:52 PM   #4
shadoweater
Senior Member
 
shadoweater's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: USA West Coast
Posts: 144
Default

Should we really even have four separate chatrooms, given the fact that there's usually only 30 or so people signed into chat at a time?
__________________
34/m/USA west coast

(as of 2024, in case I forget to update)
shadoweater is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-28-2014, 03:58 AM   #5
Kitten
The One & Only
 
Kitten's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Gehenna
Posts: 1,215
Blog Entries: 2
Default

I think most of the friction is because although the rooms or their descriptions never officially changed, the rules for them did. Not to mention that the rules are not consistently enforced. The BDSM room used to be a relatively spam-free environment where the BDSM crowd gathered and often talked on-topic but off-topic as well, while the T or D & casual players gathered in other rooms. I remember being taught a bit on BDSM chatroom etiquette in fact, so very long ago!

Now, everybody and their momma wants to go to the BDSM room since the term BDSM has broadened and now includes pretty much any sort of deviant sexual behaviour or thinking. Which amazing! And fun! In some ways. But a little frustrating as well.

I think having a spam-only room with a ready-made template like mentioned above (i.e. [age] - [gender] - [D/s position] is looking for [age] - [gender] - [D/s position] for [little personal message]) would be really helpful, especially since you can then also regulate how many messages users can send per minute. That way, everybody can get a chance to put their ad out there without being drowned out by chatter, or flooders/spammers. And without annoying anybody that prefers to chat & socialise instead of hunting to "get" something.

Four rooms is two too many.
Or well, that's just my $0.02

Kitten is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2015, 01:41 PM   #6
Shaden
Member
 
Shaden's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Ireland
Posts: 33
Default

I think a full redesign of the chat would be a good idea. Narrow down the chat rooms and make it a little bit more obvious as to where people belong, and rather than have fancy names like "The scene" or "the lounge". Just have names like "general chat" "advertising" and "master & slave". that makes it a little more obvious for people. As nellybell said to me, "people in the chat don't take hints, they need it spelt out for them", and after experience, I have to agree. And maybe if these chats had obvious rules, like before joining they are shown the rules and have to accept it much the same as a terms and service, just, shorter, and that these rules are enforced. Not just by staff, maybe put anti-spam systems in place or something along those lines. All in all i think a redesign of the chat would be the best way to go.
Shaden is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Advertisements
Kink Talk

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:41 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc. - Also check out Kink Talk!reptilelaborer