Fiction: $10 slave

meeep123 · 08-12-2010, 04:40 PM

prolog

k im 17 and have a 14 year old sister my parents went to visit our grandma for a week but my sister is having a friend spend the week. But i guess they had a plan for me...

Day 1 9:00am i woke up and started to walk down stairs but i get pulled to my sisters room and am striped down in a flash i get tied to the bed im about to scream but fell a mouth around my dick. i hear my sister say "that will keep you quite" then the mouth is taken off it was my sisters friend. they both had on only bras and thongs, then my sister said "we only have a week so heres the deal if you want more you have to agree to the deal to be our slave for a week for $10." i think about what fun it would be but i ask what the ruls are then they hand me a piece of paper.
rules
1. you will be our slave we can do to you what we want and you cant decline
2. it will be fun and very sexual but you must forget that im your sister im just your master.
3. 4 days in for 1 day youll be the master we will do all that you say
.
My sister ask "do you except?". i think and say yes then they undo the straps i walk into my room grab 10 dollers out of my wallet and walk back in still naked and hand it to my sister. She says good now for the fun...

tell me what you think and if i should continue?

Nick · 08-12-2010, 05:09 PM

Could be interesting but there are quite a few spelling errors and the storyline is moving very fast so far. Try slowing down the storytelling a bit as well as typing the story into a word program for spell check or have a proof reader help you out.

meeep123 · 08-12-2010, 06:51 PM

Ok thanks for the tips
Day1 9:05am
They had me lie down and they tied me up again. They first started rubbing my cock until it got to about 4or5 in then the doorbell rang, her friend ran to get it still in her underwear then my sister started to suck on me her tongue went around my dick I was about to release into my sister until the door opened and her friend and a guy walked in. my sister stopped and said “hay mark and welcome back Susie.”. then my sister pulled out a big black belt then she pulled out a pair of underwear that had a penis and balls on them as she put it on mark took off his pants, they said we are going to pick if it is real or fake. Then they blind folded me and they had me open my mouth then I felt something go into my mouth I sucked it. It tasted pleasant it had a taste I couldn’t identify after about 5min of me sucking and tasting then they pulled it out I said “fake” no response. Then another thing went in it tasted salty and there was liquid on the tip that was salty I knew it was real but when tried to pull my head back something grabbed it and started moving my head back and forth then cum erupted in my mouth then someone said swallow. I swallowed it all then I saw mark standing in front of me with cum and saliva on his dick. Then they asked if I liked my sisters pussy taste on the fake dildo then asked if I like penis and cum…

Memories for Life · 08-13-2010, 02:41 AM

I "expect" to these long continuous sentences which never pause for you to take a breath before continuing along with what the next person is saying its difficult to read and I "accept" it will continue to be written this way no matter who writes what comments!

cornylad · 08-13-2010, 08:49 AM

really gd story, nice start, continue please

many thanks

interesting · 08-13-2010, 10:07 AM

Sigh.

Incest. Mature theme. R-18.

Sorry to be a party-pooper.

Also it would be appreciated if you could write punctuation into your sentences it would greatly help the reading and people would probably enjoy it more I dont mind the content of the text because those stories can still be erotic but the theme is definetely too mature to be posted in only truth or dare stories it needs to be in the mature section so it should be moved there so apologies again but I have to point it out you could also do paragraphs and even using quotation for the dialogue but thats just my opinion all in all if you can keep writing it keep going and improve yourself and the presentation and the story and this might be interesting thank you

zeke · 08-13-2010, 11:17 AM

please keep the story going i love it its amazing!

Memories for Life · 08-13-2010, 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by interesting

Sigh.

Incest. Mature theme. R-18.

Sorry to be a party-pooper.

Also it would be appreciated if you could write punctuation into your sentences it would greatly help the reading and people would probably enjoy it more I dont mind the content of the text because those stories can still be erotic but the theme is definetely too mature to be posted in only truth or dare stories it needs to be in the mature section so it should be moved there so apologies again but I have to point it out you could also do paragraphs and even using quotation for the dialogue but thats just my opinion all in all if you can keep writing it keep going and improve yourself and the presentation and the story and this might be interesting thank you

Nice reply, Interesting! or Interesting reply, Nice!

Dicedarefan666 · 08-13-2010, 04:09 PM

I'm sorry, but honestly, is this your best work? This isn't a story, this is a very poorly constructed fantasy of a 13 year old who doesn't know how English works.

zeke · 08-18-2010, 11:37 AM

keep going please!

08-12-2010, 04:40 PM	#1
meeep123 Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: U.S Posts: 79	$10 slave prologk im 17 and have a 14 year old sister my parents went to visit our grandma for a week but my sister is having a friend spend the week. But i guess they had a plan for me... Day 1 9:00am i woke up and started to walk down stairs but i get pulled to my sisters room and am striped down in a flash i get tied to the bed im about to scream but fell a mouth around my dick. i hear my sister say "that will keep you quite" then the mouth is taken off it was my sisters friend. they both had on only bras and thongs, then my sister said "we only have a week so heres the deal if you want more you have to agree to the deal to be our slave for a week for $10." i think about what fun it would be but i ask what the ruls are then they hand me a piece of paper. rules 1. you will be our slave we can do to you what we want and you cant decline 2. it will be fun and very sexual but you must forget that im your sister im just your master. 3. 4 days in for 1 day youll be the master we will do all that you say . My sister ask "do you except?". i think and say yes then they undo the straps i walk into my room grab 10 dollers out of my wallet and walk back in still naked and hand it to my sister. She says good now for the fun... tell me what you think and if i should continue? __________________ Like:Wedgie,crossdress,spanking, cum risky and when it last a while Limits:family,friends,poo

08-12-2010, 05:09 PM	#2
Nick Distinguished Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Ohio Posts: 834	Could be interesting but there are quite a few spelling errors and the storyline is moving very fast so far. Try slowing down the storytelling a bit as well as typing the story into a word program for spell check or have a proof reader help you out. __________________ 27/ Male/ US/ Switch Likes: Underwear, Jockstrap, Embarrassing, Webcam or Pics, Naked, Semi-public, slight risk, strip games, dice dares, wedgies, clothing/cum control, anal, light humiliation Dislikes: Piss, Body Writing, messy Limits:Really public, family, friends, scat, gross, pain. *Impossible:* Crossdressing. I own NO girls clothes. kik: nick.undies Skype: nick.undies SnapChat: SnapNickR

08-12-2010, 06:51 PM	#3
meeep123 Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: U.S Posts: 79	Ok thanks for the tips Day1 9:05am They had me lie down and they tied me up again. They first started rubbing my cock until it got to about 4or5 in then the doorbell rang, her friend ran to get it still in her underwear then my sister started to suck on me her tongue went around my dick I was about to release into my sister until the door opened and her friend and a guy walked in. my sister stopped and said “hay mark and welcome back Susie.”. then my sister pulled out a big black belt then she pulled out a pair of underwear that had a penis and balls on them as she put it on mark took off his pants, they said we are going to pick if it is real or fake. Then they blind folded me and they had me open my mouth then I felt something go into my mouth I sucked it. It tasted pleasant it had a taste I couldn’t identify after about 5min of me sucking and tasting then they pulled it out I said “fake” no response. Then another thing went in it tasted salty and there was liquid on the tip that was salty I knew it was real but when tried to pull my head back something grabbed it and started moving my head back and forth then cum erupted in my mouth then someone said swallow. I swallowed it all then I saw mark standing in front of me with cum and saliva on his dick. Then they asked if I liked my sisters pussy taste on the fake dildo then asked if I like penis and cum… __________________ Like:Wedgie,crossdress,spanking, cum risky and when it last a while Limits:family,friends,poo

08-13-2010, 08:49 AM	#5
cornylad Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 178	keep going really gd story, nice start, continue please many thanks

08-13-2010, 10:07 AM	#6
interesting getDare Succubus Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Somewhere between here and there, in Quebec, Canada... Posts: 1,662 Blog Entries: 27	Sigh. Incest. Mature theme. R-18. Sorry to be a party-pooper. Also it would be appreciated if you could write punctuation into your sentences it would greatly help the reading and people would probably enjoy it more I dont mind the content of the text because those stories can still be erotic but the theme is definetely too mature to be posted in only truth or dare stories it needs to be in the mature section so it should be moved there so apologies again but I have to point it out you could also do paragraphs and even using quotation for the dialogue but thats just my opinion all in all if you can keep writing it keep going and improve yourself and the presentation and the story and this might be interesting thank you __________________ You can visit my erotic stories website at: interestinglifestories.weebly.com This link can get you to all of my stories on this site as well: *Blog for my GD stories*

08-13-2010, 02:41 AM	#4
Memories for Life getDare Devil Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Jacksonville, FL Posts: 1,012	I "expect" to these long continuous sentences which never pause for you to take a breath before continuing along with what the next person is saying its difficult to read and I "accept" it will continue to be written this way no matter who writes what comments!

08-13-2010, 11:17 AM	#7
zeke Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 52	please keep going please keep the story going i love it its amazing!

08-13-2010, 04:09 PM	#9
Dicedarefan666 getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 403	I'm sorry, but honestly, is this your best work? This isn't a story, this is a very poorly constructed fantasy of a 13 year old who doesn't know how English works. __________________ Likes: Light to moderate pain - Giving dares - Asking questions Dislikes: Hard pain - Jacking off - Semi-public - Wedgies Hates: Extreme pain - Urine - Full Public - Involving other people Limits (Will never do these) Permanent damage - Involving Family - Scat - Involving Animals - Crossdressing - Eating Gross stuff

08-18-2010, 11:37 AM	#10
zeke Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 52	keep going please! keep going please!