DEBATE CORNER Edition 1: Consensual Blackmail, State of Kinktalk and Pineapple Pizza

[TheoDares]

For far too long has Getdare been littered with weak minded individuals, horny old age pensioners begging for exposure, when what they should be begging for is English Tuition. Too long has this forum been plagued by underage users pretending to be 18 with their "No LIMITS!!!" dares that they don't do. With that being said, it's time for some intelligent debate. It's time for the smart people on the forum to rise! With that, it's time for Debate Corner.

Debate Corner will be a weekly thread on Getdare, coming out every Friday or Saturday depending on your timezone. It will feature three opinions that I hold and then also my argument FOR holding that opinion. The aim of this thread is to encourage some smart conversation, and to encourage some amazing debate that enriches us all! This is an opinion thread and therefore emotions can get high. While passion is great, and I'll certainly be giving some, it's about the smart people in Getdare having fun and debating, not about fighting and argument. So, do you have more brain cells than sex toys? If so, this is the thread for you.

Opinion 1
Consensual Blackmail does not exist.

Just recently, I left a ‘Consensual Blackmail’ relationship that stopped being consensual quite a while into it. This led me to question the very concept of a Consensual Blackmail relationship and also to question whether it actually exists. Let’s first look at what Blackmail is. It’s the act of making unjustified threats in order to make a gain. In the BDSM world, the unjustified threats, is a leak of information or pictures. The gain is a submissive partner, usually of a sexual nature to pleasure the dominant. Now, by the very definition of the word ‘Blackmail’, the practice of Consensual Blackmail is not an actual thing - I say this because of the words “unjustified threats.” In a Consensual Blackmail relationship, the threats are not justified - but that’s not even the main point to be made here.

People generally say there are safewords with Consensual Blackmail. This implies that it is not a permanent thing and that the submissive can withdraw from the agreement at any time. This is not blackmail. It creates the feeling of Blackmail. It creates the illusion of being Blackmailed, but it’s not actually Blackmail. To be properly Blackmailed, you have to give up the right to withdraw your consent, and at that point - it becomes Non-Consensual, which is exactly what happened in my relationship as a Blackmail Slave. Now, you may be thinking that once the information is in the hands of the dominant, the dominant could just leak - and yes, you are right.... But is the leak then consensual? Can we consensually leak the information?

The very idea of becoming a Blackmail Slave is to do the tasks that your dominant wants so that you will not be leaked. Someone who becomes this kind of slave should do so with the intent of not being leaked. If you actually want to be leaked, then blackmail isn’t for you - it’s exposure that you are looking for. I’m aware that several on Getdare and Kinktalk appear to get those two fetishes horribly mixed up. The idea that someone doesn’t want to be leaked, if they then get leaked for not following the dominants orders, as they should in this type of relationship, then is it still actually consensual?

Opinion 2
The Kinktalk Forums Are In An Awful State

While I’m not sure of the official terminology employed by server administrator, Depp, I see Kinktalk as our sister site. When I look at the Kinktalk site, all I see is an actual dumping ground for Getdare’s banned and more hornier users, a place that people use merely for the ‘Album’ feature, and not a site that people take pride in with good moderation. Whether it’s the poor written threads, or the constant spam and flood. Part of this is in fault to the Getdare nudity rules, which I’m sure will be a topic of discussion for another day, as part of this Debate Corner. As Getdare does not allow for nudity, Kinktalk is seen as the place people “have” to go for it, as opposed to want to go for it.

I think if I’m right in thinking Kinktalk is a related site to Getdare, then Kinktalk needs to develop its own Unique Selling Point. What can I do on the Kinktalk site, that I can not do on the Getdare site? There already is some things on there. For example, publish nude photos without having to wait for inactive moderators to moderate them. For example, make and join social groups for all manner of things; an idea that I wish was brought to Getdare. An entire subsection of the forum devoted to being able to show off and be exposed live on the threads for everybody to see.

The one thing that is for sure is Kinktalk is a site that people have stopped caring about. It doesn’t have to be this way though. In the last 24 hours, as of this writing, a total of 6597 different IP Addresses visited the site. Why is it that a site with that many people visiting, 500+ have registered accounts is treated and looks like a dumping site? It’s because, in part - it is very similar to Getdare. Kinktalk doesn’t exactly have it’s own identity, it’s just the place where we can post nudes because Getdare won’t let us. This has created a huge state on the forums.

Opinion 3
Pineapple does not ever go on Pizza

Mental Health is ripe in the world, with third-world countries now starting to take a much bigger, much more increased look. Illnesses such as Bipolar, Depression and Anxiety are being treated a lot more serious now and the platforms for debate and discussion in regards to them has now grown. However, some Mental Illnesses are being ignored and simply just glossed over, including Pineagrossness. For those who don’t know, these sick freaks contaminate Pizza, a lovely, delectable and delightful meal from the Gods, with slices of Pineapple.

I must confess to being a rather simple man, usually favouring the Margarita Pizza, but I can also be extremely adventurous. I’ve played around with a few meats on my Pizza’s from Sausage to Bacon to Ham to Chicken to Chicken Tikka to Turkey and so on. One thing I’ve never experimented with is the abomination that is putting Pineapple on Pizza. Firstly, Pineapple is gross as it is.

I want to ask you something - what do Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, Jack the Ripper, Jeffrey Dahmer, OJ Simpson, Barack Obama’s Government and Sam Panopoulos have in common? All were guilty of horrible crimes against humanity. Whether it was the Holocaust or equipping the Islamic State with the weapons needed for a rampage, they were horrible crimes that we still feel the effect of today. Some of you may not know who Sam Panopoulos is, so allow me to explain. This sick freak, in 1962 came up with the idea of the “Hawaiian Pizza” - a lovely Pizza, with delicious ham… ruined, soiled by Pineapple.

I have created many mean and challenging dares, but I’ve never made anyone eat this type of abomination of God’s will. Would you put slices of Orange on Pizza? Would you place Banana on your cheesy, tomatoey base? The answer is no, so why would you put any other type of fruit on Pizza? People like Sam are Monsters, Monsters that do not deserve to live, and I know that’s a strong opinion to have - but God Dammit, those Pizza’s are gross.

<><><><><>

What do YOU think? Can you have a real consensual Blackmail relationship? Is Kinktalk a dying platform? Who was worse - Hitler or Panopoulos? Comment and let me know your thoughts!

Theodares

[bamadude01]

Originally Posted by TheoDares

For far too long has Getdare been littered with weak minded individuals, horny old age pensioners begging for exposure, when what they should be begging for is English Tuition. Too long has this forum been plagued by underage users pretending to be 18 with their "No LIMITS!!!" dares that they don't do. With that being said, it's time for some intelligent debate. It's time for the smart people on the forum to rise! With that, it's time for Debate Corner.

Debate Corner will be a weekly thread on Getdare, coming out every Friday or Saturday depending on your timezone. It will feature three opinions that I hold and then also my argument FOR holding that opinion. The aim of this thread is to encourage some smart conversation, and to encourage some amazing debate that enriches us all! This is an opinion thread and therefore emotions can get high. While passion is great, and I'll certainly be giving some, it's about the smart people in Getdare having fun and debating, not about fighting and argument. So, do you have more brain cells than sex toys? If so, this is the thread for you.

Opinion 1
Consensual Blackmail does not exist.

Just recently, I left a ‘Consensual Blackmail’ relationship that stopped being consensual quite a while into it. This led me to question the very concept of a Consensual Blackmail relationship and also to question whether it actually exists. Let’s first look at what Blackmail is. It’s the act of making unjustified threats in order to make a gain. In the BDSM world, the unjustified threats, is a leak of information or pictures. The gain is a submissive partner, usually of a sexual nature to pleasure the dominant. Now, by the very definition of the word ‘Blackmail’, the practice of Consensual Blackmail is not an actual thing - I say this because of the words “unjustified threats.” In a Consensual Blackmail relationship, the threats are not justified - but that’s not even the main point to be made here.

People generally say there are safewords with Consensual Blackmail. This implies that it is not a permanent thing and that the submissive can withdraw from the agreement at any time. This is not blackmail. It creates the feeling of Blackmail. It creates the illusion of being Blackmailed, but it’s not actually Blackmail. To be properly Blackmailed, you have to give up the right to withdraw your consent, and at that point - it becomes Non-Consensual, which is exactly what happened in my relationship as a Blackmail Slave. Now, you may be thinking that once the information is in the hands of the dominant, the dominant could just leak - and yes, you are right.... But is the leak then consensual? Can we consensually leak the information?

The very idea of becoming a Blackmail Slave is to do the tasks that your dominant wants so that you will not be leaked. Someone who becomes this kind of slave should do so with the intent of not being leaked. If you actually want to be leaked, then blackmail isn’t for you - it’s exposure that you are looking for. I’m aware that several on Getdare and Kinktalk appear to get those two fetishes horribly mixed up. The idea that someone doesn’t want to be leaked, if they then get leaked for not following the dominants orders, as they should in this type of relationship, then is it still actually consensual?

Opinion 2
The Kinktalk Forums Are In An Awful State

While I’m not sure of the official terminology employed by server administrator, Depp, I see Kinktalk as our sister site. When I look at the Kinktalk site, all I see is an actual dumping ground for Getdare’s banned and more hornier users, a place that people use merely for the ‘Album’ feature, and not a site that people take pride in with good moderation. Whether it’s the poor written threads, or the constant spam and flood. Part of this is in fault to the Getdare nudity rules, which I’m sure will be a topic of discussion for another day, as part of this Debate Corner. As Getdare does not allow for nudity, Kinktalk is seen as the place people “have” to go for it, as opposed to want to go for it.

I think if I’m right in thinking Kinktalk is a related site to Getdare, then Kinktalk needs to develop its own Unique Selling Point. What can I do on the Kinktalk site, that I can not do on the Getdare site? There already is some things on there. For example, publish nude photos without having to wait for inactive moderators to moderate them. For example, make and join social groups for all manner of things; an idea that I wish was brought to Getdare. An entire subsection of the forum devoted to being able to show off and be exposed live on the threads for everybody to see.

The one thing that is for sure is Kinktalk is a site that people have stopped caring about. It doesn’t have to be this way though. In the last 24 hours, as of this writing, a total of 6597 different IP Addresses visited the site. Why is it that a site with that many people visiting, 500+ have registered accounts is treated and looks like a dumping site? It’s because, in part - it is very similar to Getdare. Kinktalk doesn’t exactly have it’s own identity, it’s just the place where we can post nudes because Getdare won’t let us. This has created a huge state on the forums.

Opinion 3
Pineapple does not ever go on Pizza

Mental Health is ripe in the world, with third-world countries now starting to take a much bigger, much more increased look. Illnesses such as Bipolar, Depression and Anxiety are being treated a lot more serious now and the platforms for debate and discussion in regards to them has now grown. However, some Mental Illnesses are being ignored and simply just glossed over, including Pineagrossness. For those who don’t know, these sick freaks contaminate Pizza, a lovely, delectable and delightful meal from the Gods, with slices of Pineapple.

I must confess to being a rather simple man, usually favouring the Margarita Pizza, but I can also be extremely adventurous. I’ve played around with a few meats on my Pizza’s from Sausage to Bacon to Ham to Chicken to Chicken Tikka to Turkey and so on. One thing I’ve never experimented with is the abomination that is putting Pineapple on Pizza. Firstly, Pineapple is gross as it is.

I want to ask you something - what do Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, Jack the Ripper, Jeffrey Dahmer, OJ Simpson, Barack Obama’s Government and Sam Panopoulos have in common? All were guilty of horrible crimes against humanity. Whether it was the Holocaust or equipping the Islamic State with the weapons needed for a rampage, they were horrible crimes that we still feel the effect of today. Some of you may not know who Sam Panopoulos is, so allow me to explain. This sick freak, in 1962 came up with the idea of the “Hawaiian Pizza” - a lovely Pizza, with delicious ham… ruined, soiled by Pineapple.

I have created many mean and challenging dares, but I’ve never made anyone eat this type of abomination of God’s will. Would you put slices of Orange on Pizza? Would you place Banana on your cheesy, tomatoey base? The answer is no, so why would you put any other type of fruit on Pizza? People like Sam are Monsters, Monsters that do not deserve to live, and I know that’s a strong opinion to have - but God Dammit, those Pizza’s are gross.

<><><><><>

What do YOU think? Can you have a real consensual Blackmail relationship? Is Kinktalk a dying platform? Who was worse - Hitler or Panopoulos? Comment and let me know your thoughts!

Theodares

Opinion 1: I have to agree. Consensuality negates Blackmail, and vice versa. However, I also understand how the theory may have come about. The submissive wants the RISK of exposure, without the actual exposure, so they buy into a "consensual blackmail" scenario, and try to play out the fantasy of being blackmailed.
As a dominant, I don't typically enjoy this kind of activity myself. I have participated in some of the blackmail threads, with mixed results. I would rather keep things fully consensual, and more casual, and earn those pics/info through mutual trust instead of blackmail. I find it more satisfying, and more maintainable long-term.

Opinion 2: I have to disclose here, that I am one of those users that 99.9% of my Kinktalk activity is browsing and posting in the albums feature. I almost never look at the actual forums anymore, as I typically find them boring and irrelevant to my needs/wants. I'm honestly not sure how to fix that.

Opinion 3: Being a simple man myself, my pizza choices are limited (usually plain cheese, or Italian sausage and/or bacon for meats), so I personally would never add pineapple. Not that I mind pineapple itself, I find the juice from it quite tasty and healthy, I just don't want it on pizza. I can see the concept of "Hawaiian style", but that would be the only situation I could see the idea of adding pineapple. That being said, while it's not my personal taste, I try not to judge others for their choices, so eat pineapple pizza if you want, just don't ask if I want any.

[subScoot]

Opinion 1 - Agree, you can do things consensual-ly that lead to blackmail, and you can agree to undesirable consequences if you do not deliver your end of the bargain, but the nature of blackmail is that it cannot be consensual. Although that may be a legalistic hair splitting of the term blackmail. I don't really want to judge other people's kinks (unless it is kinktalk which I will judge in a sec) but blackmail just isn't one of mine. I would like to think that for periods of time a good sub can get addicted to what a good dom brings out of them, and that can be leverage. You have a safe word but if you use it everything stops permanently. That is probably close to blackmail, but it demands more of both parties than I think most are willing to or able to deliver.

Opinion 2 - You (or at least I) know it's bad when I start a measure of how bad it is, and kinktalk broke right through that. It is frothing petri dish of spam and scams. Case in point: the number of doms that have posted application forms for slaves within seconds of joining the site. In business you need to stick to your knitting. If it is a photo storage site ... just make it that. I think that a variant on Temporarily Exposed (watermarking content with the viewer's IP) and say unsee (invitation only option) is usefull, kinktalk is convenient.

Option 3 - Without going into US politics - but you started it - O'Bama is to pineapples as Trump is to oranges, except to my eye there is little to no physical resemblance between O'Bama and a pineapple. On the other had round shape, general colo(u)r and complexion ... Agent Orange.

Pizza variants are fraught with risk ... I can still remember a goat cheeze crusted, oregano covered, grilled chicken pizza that I had a sordid affair with, but Hawian Pizza is like kink talk galleries - sure it's a folder with pictures but I know porn when I see it and Pizza when I taste it.

And furthermore ever seen what Pinapple does to baked ham ... you pull the pineapple off and it's like a festering sore under there. Just saying

[subGanymede]

What do YOU think? Can you have a real consensual Blackmail relationship?
Is Kinktalk a dying platform?
Who was worse - Hitler or Panopoulos?

Kinda depends. Legally, blackmailing makes you a criminal, regardless of context. So the blackmailee still holds power over the blackmailer.
Realistically, giving someone power over you and consent to use it means, that you have entered into consensual blackmail.

No. Kinktalk as a picture dump for getDare will continue existing.

Hitler, clearly. Why does anyone care about what others put on their pizzas? I put Mozzarella above all the other topings, sue me.

Am i doing good?

[sir sam]

Fun initiative!

My thougts on blackmail are in >>this<< blog.
In short: i don’t believe in it.
I don’t care about the moral aspect but just about safety.
I may start “ok”, but the biggest downside is that the “safety mechanisms” are compromised.
Threshold for a sub to use the safeword gets higher. In fact a sub may get concerned about the power of the safeword.
A dom comes in an awkward position. I would say it’s quite normal for a dom to want to push far and use the subs reaction to judge whether it’s enough. With blackmail the reaction of the sub becomes unreliable.
IF things go wrong,... the disaster is complete.

And just for the record, although I play very carefully, in some isolated occasions a scene is harder than in hindsight would have been good. In those cases I can be very happy it was not a blackmail thing I was pushing.

——
Best pizza’s have ansjovis and pepperoni.
No pineapple

[RiskyFlame]

Opinion 2
The Kinktalk Forums Are In An Awful State

Kink Talk was created as the getDare 18+ counterpart when getDare was aiming for a PG-13 rating. I don't know what kind of content Kink Talk hosted before 2012 but I can imagine that when getDare became for 18+ users only, Kink Talk had lost its function. Luckily, there are still a few users on Kink Talk that try to open up new discussions and post new interesting content. I am not one of them.

Opinion 3
Pineapple does not ever go on Pizza

Nonsense!

[TheoDares]

Originally Posted by RiskyFlame

Nonsense!

You disgust me.

As for the Kinktalk/Getdare mention there, I think Getdare needs to make its mind up about what age rating it wants lmao. 18+ and still no nudity - youwot

[Dashie]

Originally Posted by TheoDares

18+ and still no nudity - youwot

About that,
Honestly I prefer not seeing dicks and nuts as every second avatar.
And dont tell me there wont be any because there are already enough 'unmature' members here that find it hot to expose their small sausages.

Edit: I should add expose them via PM to random strangers is also not to uncommon.

[TheoDares]

Originally Posted by Dashie

About that,
Honestly I prefer not seeing dicks and nuts as every second avatar.
And dont tell me there wont be any because there are already enough 'unmature' members here that find it hot to expose their small sausages.

Edit: I should add expose them via PM to random strangers is also not to uncommon.

Oooh someone who's got a differing opinion to me - love it! Exactly what the thread is for. And very nice, small sausages - there is too many of these, I admit - but end of the day, I don't see why there shouldn't be pictures of that nature when lets face it, that's all any thread is about these days on here.

[semper_virilis]

If pineapple on pizza is one of your limits, that's fine. Just don't expect everyone to take you seriously.

[TheoDares]

Originally Posted by semper_virilis

If pineapple on pizza is one of your limits, that's fine. Just don't expect everyone to take you seriously.

...You list "Gross" as one of your limits so I'm assuming it's your limit too.

[semper_virilis]

Originally Posted by TheoDares

...You list "Gross" as one of your limits so I'm assuming it's your limit too.

Your assumption betrays a rather narrow view of the world.

[tofu]

Pineapple on pizza for life

[TheoDares]

Originally Posted by tofu

Pineapple on pizza for life

You actually are a disgusting human being! How can you do this to your own body?

[Hammarling]

Originally Posted by TheoDares

Oooh someone who's got a differing opinion to me - love it! Exactly what the thread is for. And very nice, small sausages - there is too many of these, I admit - but end of the day, I don't see why there shouldn't be pictures of that nature when lets face it, that's all any thread is about these days on here.

How about consent? I don't want to see that sort of thing all over the site without a choice. At least if a thread is based around sending images via a service like kik, i have the choice to not take part and not have to see those images. Then what about the threads not about dick pics, there's plenty of those that go very nicely without being spoiled.
Allowing them everywhere, and not giving me a choice to avoid them... no thanks.

An 18+ album section, sure why not. That has the barrier of choice, if i have to click to enter a section i'm ok with what i will see. I'm opting in, not having it forced upon me.

Do you see the difference?