Just use an apple. normally it wouldn't fit unless you're very experienced but you can shape it. Just bite around it like you normally would, leaving a u shaped channel running horizontally around the apple. the bottom will be narrow enough that you can slip it in, but you'll want to round off the edge you've just left (use a spoon or a carrot peeler) so it's smooth. The channel you've made will make a nice spot for your anus to hang on to, and the very wide top of the apple will create an excellent stopper so that it doesn't go in all the way. And all it took was a trip to the grocery store.
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