[JacobsField]

Adam's back. Enjoy the new story. Merry Christmas.

Let me know how you like it!

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Adam was proud to be a soldier. He wore the blue and gray Slickville Soldiers jersey with his number embroidered on the back. Adam wore number 47. Something about that number always spoke to him. It was the right combination of even and odd and it was prime. Though he never played organized sports, anytime he was asked to pick a number, it was always 47. People had always asked why the Soldiers didn’t wear colors like green, brown, or tan, but nobody seemed to have an answer. Adam didn’t care. He was in his jersey and he was on the team.

He thought to himself as he walked into locker room 2 for his third game as a Soldier that he was actually really happy that he had joined the team. Despite crawling through the mud in just a jock strap, wearing frozen boxer briefs lined with Icy Hot while having his shoe tied to his balls with everything but the kitchen sink thrown at him in the shower, and being forced to go home in his muddy football kit, he really liked being on the team.

When he got into the locker room, he was greeted by his best friend on the team, Mack. Mack was just pulling up his cup which, much like Adam’s now, wasn’t white. After a little bit of readjusting, Mack mentioned to Adam that Cody was looking for him and wanted to see him right away when he arrived. Adam wondered what this could be all about, but went in search for Cody.

He finally found him in the bathroom, filling up water bottles for the game. Turns out that even though the season had changed to fall, nobody had told Mother Nature. The guy on TV said that the temperature was going to be in the upper 80s with a dew point in the 70s. Even though Adam didn’t know what the dew point meant, the guy on TV basically said that anyone doing strenuous activity outside would need to stay hydrated. In addition to the hot and humid weather, there was a chance for some thunderstorms. Adam didn’t put much stock in that, however, because the TV guy in his shirt and tie and teeth that glistened when he smiled only said that there’s a ten percent chance of that.

As Cody screwed on the lid of the last water bottle, he motioned to Adam to follow him down the hallway. Adam had never been down this hallway before. It was a bit dark with several team posters on the wall from the last decade. There was a poster of the 2004 Slickville Soldiers along with a schedule showing their wins and losses. The year, the team was pretty good. They had won 20 of their 22 games. The team was shown holding some sort of cup, most likely from winning a championship of some sort. Everyone on that poster looked happy. There was another one from 2011 and even though everyone had a smile on their face, you could tell that it was different than 2004.

Adam paused to look at the poster for just a moment and realized that one of the smiling, not happy, faces belonged to Cody McIntyre. Pictured in the third row, fifth from the left, Cody must have been a freshman that year. He looked a bit different than now, however. It almost looked like his face was painted in Slickville blue and silver and his hair, what was left of it, was blonde.

They continued walking down the hall and Adam opened the door to a small room. It looked like a closet even though it did contain a small desk and a dry erase board. It had a window to the locker room, as well. Adam had seen that window before, but it was always dark. He had no idea where it led and didn’t put much thought into it. Adam looked out the window and he could see more of the team getting ready for today’s match against the Restin Buffalo.

“You see, this?” Cody said, directing his words to Adam, who was just gazing out the window. Adam, turning his attention back to the desk where Cody was pointing, nodded. “This is the book of rules.” Cody says, while at the same time almost rolling his eyes. “They could have come up with a better name, but didn’t.” Cody continued to explain that the book of rules has been passed down since the 1977 season from the very first Slickville Soldiers team to win the CCSL, or Central Coast Soccer League, Cup.

That year, they decided that they were going to start a new tradition. On the outside of the book was a soccer ball. That was it. As Cody opened the book, you could smell the musty scent of the 1970s. It was creeping back from through the pages. On the first page was a passage that read “This is the Slickville Soldiers Book of Rules. This book will bring spoils to the victors but hell to all others. As a member of the Slickville Soldiers, you must adhere to all rules within these pages.”

Adam didn’t like the sound of “hell to all others” but he was interested. Cody continued to explain that the main purpose of the book is to ensure winning seasons. He mentioned that each team with a winning record would be able to record a new rule for the book. That rule would have to be followed from that point forward.

“So, this is kind of like a motivating tool?” Adam said. Cody, with a small grin, nodded and continued past the first page. Adam saw the first page that said “Rule #1: The rookie will wear their jock strap for a week following each loss.” He didn’t like the look of this. There was also a note at the end of the page. “Nobody may see the remaining pages except for the team captain.”

Cody mentioned that there were 32 rules in the book. That means that in the years since the book was introduced, 32 out of the 37 teams have had winning records. One of the years that they didn’t have a winning record was 2011. Adam thought back to his trip down the hallway and the smiling, yet unhappy team and the picture of Cody with his face painted and his bleached hair. He began to get nervous.

Luckily, since he’s been on the team, Adam had yet to see a loss. The team was two and oh with him on the field and he hoped to keep it that way. He really… and I mean really… didn’t want to wear his jock for an entire week. Cody let Adam know that as new rules were broken, he’d inform the team. So why did Cody bring Adam down to show him the book if these were team rules? He was a little perplexed, but let it go.

They were about fifteen minutes from gametime so they hustled to the locker room and got changed. There were only a few stragglers in the room when they made it back. Adam asked Cody “so, why show me the book and not anyone else?” Cody just looked at him and shook his head “You’ll see. Let’s just win, okay?” Adam nodded.

Out on the field, the team gathered with the coach as he outlined the strategy of the game against the Buffalo. All Adam could think about was the book and what the rules were. He was really hoping not to have to wear his jock strap for the entire week. Adam was also a little nervous because even though the team had won both games so far, he had yet to score. His games were solid, but he didn’t put the ball past the keeper once.

Halfway through the game and after a brief rain delay, the score was tied at 1. Mack kicked the ball over to Miko who booted it high and over the net. The ball was tossed back into play by the Buffalo, but was quickly taken away by Cody. Cody saw Adam wide open about 30 feet from the goal and sent the ball flying through the air to his teammate. Almost like you would see in a video game, performed a near flip, striking the ball and sending it toward the net where the keeper made a fantastic save. Adam thought he had one but instead just ended up muddy from the ‘ten percent chance of rain.’

Two minutes left in the second half the score is still tied at 1. There had been a few good shots, but none as good as Adam’s. If it hadn’t been for that goaltender, they would be heading toward victory. Now it was the Buffalo who were stampeding down the field. With less than two minutes left, two quick passes and a shot led to a Buffalo goal. After their normal celebration, which, in this case, included a belly slide in the mud, the Soldiers had one more chance. Down two to one, they marched up the field and after a quick pass across the front of the net, took one last shot. The goaltender again came up big. Time expired and the Soldiers had lost their first game since Adam joined the team.

Adam knew that this was bad. He didn’t really realize how bad it was until he got into the locker room. Turns out one of the rules is that the captain must announce when the criteria for another rule is met in front of the entire team after a loss. This was meant to remind everyone that the book of rules was meant to be a motivator.

Cody got up in front of the room to address the team. “Guys, this was a tough one. We had a chance to take the W there. Adam, hell of a shot on net. That should have gone in. Sorry you’re a little muddy after that, but I hope it was worth it.” He continued “Now, you all know about the book of rules. Some of you have had the unpleasant fortune of being a victim. Lucky for you all, Adam is now here. He is now the sole rookie on the team. Being as most of the rules are for the newbies, he’ll be taking over for you other freshmen.” There was a cheer from a couple of the freshmen on the team.

“Now, onto the rules that must be followed,” Cody continued. “First, because we lost the game, our rookie must not change out of his game-worn jock for an entire week.” Adam thought to himself “first?” and again felt his heart pound a little bit.

“Second, any rookie that goes 3 games without scoring, must take the shoe of the person sitting next to him and lay on the floor with his nose and mouth in the shoe for 3 minutes. One minute for each game without a goal.” Unlucky for Adam, Miko was standing right next to him. Miko proclaimed “Here you go, buddy. Sorry for the smell.” as he gave an evil grin.

With Adam’s face buried in a Miko’s shoe, Cody continued with the third and final applicable rule. “Anytime a goal is scored within the last two minutes of the game, the entire team will wear their uniforms home without changing and without showering. The rookie will wear theirs for the next twenty-four hours without changing or showering.”

Adam, gasping for some fresh air after a gnarly 3 minutes, was not happy at this point. Not only did he just endure a stench that no man should endure, he also has to wear his game-worn jock strap for a week and his dirty, muddy, sweaty soccer kit for the next twenty-four hours. Adam knew the point of the book of rules, but didn’t like it one bit.

The season went on.

There were losses and weeks of jock strap wearing by Adam. Throughout the course of the season, he’d slept on the field in just his jock strap after missing a wide open net, played an entire game with Icy Hot inside his jock strap for missing a free kick, and rolled across the entire length of a muddy, post-game field after a teammate got a red card. When Adam got a red card, it was even worse. The team took turns wringing out their game-worn, sweat soaked clothes over his face. This was to teach him that it wasn’t okay to let the team down.

Adam was wondering why there was so much picking on the rookie inside the book. The only times he had seen the team punished was initially for losing within the last two minutes and two other times. Once was for being scored on more than 3 times. That resulted in a terrible fate for the entire team. Each member was forced to put their jock strap into a pile at the center of the room. They were then distributed randomly. Not only did they have to wear their teammate’s jock the next game, but they also had to sleep with it on their face. That rule came from the 1984 team. They were good and nobody ever scored 3 goals on them, let alone more than 3. They wanted to make sure there was sufficient motivation for that not to happen.

The other time was for being scored on within the first two minutes of the match. When that happened, the entire team was taken to the nearby pond. They were forced to strip to just their jock straps and wade into the slippery, slimy, mucky pond. It was about 3 feet deep, but the mud sucked you down another eighteen inches. Once there, Cody tossed about 30 large washers into the air. These washers were about the size of a half-dollar and sunk right to the bottom. Each of the 14 members of the team had to find one of the washers. The last one to find one was forced to stay unwashed until he walked home. Unluckily for Adam, that was him.

Rule #17 was one that Cody kept in the back of his mind the entire season. He didn’t like it, but did his best to make sure it didn’t happen. Rule #17 revolved around the final season stats. At this point, 21 games in, the team had won 9 and lost 9, with 3 games being ruled a tie. It all came down to this final game. If they won, Cody, as team captain would get to write his own rule in the book. If they lost, rule #17 would be in effect.

The team was geared up and nobody knew about this rule except for Cody. They all wanted to win, but Cody wanted it more than anything he had ever wanted before. He knew the stakes. With everyone on the field, the game started.

Things started out well. Cody scored off the opening draw and the Soldiers had a 1-0 lead. Firing at all cylinders, the team tallied two more goals before the end of the first half. Cody was a bit relieved. He would get the winning season he had wanted and would be able to make a new rule.

He could see it now. Rule #33 would read “Every time a rookie has a shot blocked by a goalkeeper, he will army crawl from one goal to the other. Upon arriving at the other goal, he’ll strip one article of clothing then crawl to the previous goal. Once there, he’ll strip again. He’ll continue this until he’s wearing only his jock strap and shoes.”

It was all looking good until the second half. That’s where things took a nosedive. It wasn’t two minutes into the half when their arch-rivals, the Marleigh Stallions, scored an easy goal on a goaltender who wasn’t paying attention. Another minute passed and they scored again. This time, the ball actually went off a Slicksville defender and in.

Things calmed down after that until the last minute of play. Slicksville was up 3 to 2 and it looked like the Soldiers were going to get their winning season after all. It was then that Adam bobbled the ball and a Stallion picked it up and headed up the field. With 18 seconds left, the Stallions tied up the game.

After a short overtime period, it all came down to free kicks. CCSL rules stated that each team was allowed 3 kickers and whoever had the most goals after each set would win. The coach chose Cody, Miko, and because of all of his effort and for having such a strong season, Adam.

Miko was first to kick. He fired the ball right into the chest of the goalkeeper. No good. The Stallions’ kicker had the same result. Cody was next up for the Soldiers. He picked a corner of the net, aimed, fired, and the ball went in. The Stallion kicker took his shot, but it went just over the goal.

It all came down to Adam. If he scored here, the game would be over, Cody would get his rule, the Soldiers would have a winning season, and he’d be the hero of the day. He took his time, lined up the ball, and let it rip…

…

…

MISS.

Adam had missed way right of the goal and now he’d have to rely on the goalkeeper to bail him out.

The final Stallion up to kick launched the ball as if it was being shot through a cannon. It was heading right for the top corner when Jake, the Soldiers’ top goaltender for a reason, got a single finger on the ball forcing it just wide, winning the game for the Soldiers!

Adam was relieved. The team celebrated their winning season and everyone proceeded into the locker room.

Cody jumped up in front of his winning team with his grin from ear to ear. He explained the new rule that he was going to be and how excited he was to be able to contribute to the book. As a senior, this would be his legacy.

He explained, however, that even though this game was a win, there are still some rules to be followed. Adam knew that he’d have to pay for his missed free kick. Turns out he’d seen his punishment before. In the hallway on the way to see the book of rules, he noticed the picture from the 2011 team with Cody with blonde hair and a painted face. What he didn’t see was what was underneath the uniform.

Turns out that a missed free kick at the end of a game means massive punishments thanks to rule #7. Rule #7 states the following “if a rookie is called upon for a game-ending free kick and he doesn’t hit the net, he will be painted by his teammates using washable paint. He will stay like that for the team picture. In addition, he will be given a Mohawk and his hair bleached.”

Cody passed out the paints. Each teammate got one color and as soon as Adam was forced to strip off his clothes, the team went crazy. There wasn’t an inch left on Adam that wasn’t covered in the sloppy paint. The team then grabbed the clippers and removed the sides of his hair, leaving just a strip right down the middle. Finally, they took bleach and slowly and methodically worked it through Adam’s hair until the dark-haired Italian looked like he spent way too much time in a swimming pool with way too much chlorine.

It was picture time. Adam stood there in his soccer kit with his face, and every other inch of his body, painted, his hair bleached, and sporting a brand new haircut. He was in the exact same position that Cody had been 3 years ago. It was at that moment that he realized that what he was doing would make him stronger and push him to eventually be the kind of captain he saw Cody as.

The team picture featured everybody smiling, including Adam. It was hung in the dark hallway leading to the room with the book of rules, which now featured rule #33.