[momo]

So since I was one years old, my mom has been on and off with this abusive, worthless, alcoholic/druggy who doesn't give a crap about anyone, but himself. He still lived with his mom is his 40's and even beat up his mom about a year ago on one of his drunk rampages because she was sick of him coming home drunk and not contributing to the household and attempted to kick him out. Well he beat her up and dragged her out of the house by the time the cops got there to arrest him. He went to jail and says he's "changed", but I don't believe or trust him. He's been in jail plenty of times before. He has abused my mom and gotten her on drugs and alcohol. She's been sober five years, but the only thing that even got her to change was when I moved out of her house and in with my dad because I was sick of her never being there for me. I try so hard to remember she's the adult, but she acts so childish when this guy comes around. He manipulates her in ways that scare the crap out of me. The whole time he was in jail she supplied him with cigarettes and whatever his black-hole of a heart desired. And now, after everything he's done to ruin her life... She's offering him a place to stay with her at her new place out here in California. I'm scared of him even being in the same state as her. He used to stalk her and accuse her of things, and beat the crap out of her and then say "Oh I'm sorry. It'll never happen again", and then bribe me with candy so I would ignore her screaming at him and him screaming back, when she'd drag me along with her to his house. I finally got sick of it and am ready to beat the crap out of him for even talking to her when he knows he's a bad influence and that she's finally doing good on her own, and that my family is just starting to allow her back in.

I'm taller than him now, and probably could beat the crap out of him, but I don't want to go to jail. There are things in the past that have come up recently as well with my grandparents, that apparently I said he did to me. Anything I have ever told my grandparents about him has been true. I have never lied about the terrible things this guy has done. But my family haven't been know for being the most truthful people, so I wonder if they're telling me the truth or not. They say he supposedly raped me, though I'm sure I'd have recollection of that. They say I even told them so, but I would never say that if it didn't happen. So I'm not sure where I am about that. I wouldn't doubt it of his personality, but I think I would remember that if it actually happened. I'm not sure. But either way, he's still the worst person I have ever known, and I don't feel ashamed to say I believe he will burn in the firey pits of hell.

Anywho, to get to the point of this thread... Have you ever been abused or known someone who has been abused by a boyfriend or someone of similar closeness? How did they end the abuse? Where was the attraction in it? Did you/they need counseling following the break of the abusive relationship?

I normally wouldn't ask about such personal things, but I've had enough and am desperately doing anything I can to get rid of this guy. He needs to be out of my mom's life, or I'm afraid one day she just won't answer my calls...

Edit: I promise I will not share anything you tell me. If you feel more comfortable telling me whatever you feel like in a PM rather than the public forums, I don't mind and promise the PM will not be seen by anyone, but myself.