This is supposed to be a thread where you post stories. Those usually consist of "chapter" installments. If you're using MS Word, usually 3 pages in Word translates to a good "chapter" posting in your story. These "updates" usually cover several hours of story "time".
The first two segments you posted only seem to have covered a few minutes of "time" in each one.
Make your "chapters" much longer! Use some of the extra space to develop your characters more -- physical descriptions, feelings, desires, how they interact with each of the other characters, etc.
If you haven't read any other stories on getdare, please look at some of the ones labeled 5-stars. This will give you a better understanding of writing a compelling story!
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