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Old 05-09-2010, 11:51 AM   #6
SubMissChievous
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,466
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Ah, I finally got anough time to reply to this

Quote:
Originally Posted by 444
So I'm gonna start up a series of discussion threads pinpointing sexual/BDSM fetishes. The point of these threads will be so that people who are not as involved in these sort of fetishes would have a better grasp of why some of us enjoy these actions, why some of us don't, and it'd probably also help you understand yourself better.
Let me start by saying that I like this idea a lot! I'm looking forward to more to come and and read what people posts in them

Quote:
Originally Posted by 444
I'm starting with PAIN. It is a common fetish amongst BDSM folk, whether it is the sadist administrating it, or the masochist who is receiving it.
Just one thing that I think needs to be said here: Not everyone involved involved in BDSM are necessarily sadists and masochists and not all Dominants are sadists and not every subs are masochists. Just pointing it out because I've seen this quite often where such terms are used to describe «submissive» and «masochist» interchangeably. There are even some Doms who are also masochists and will order their subs to top them as service. I, for one, am a masochist but not a «pain slut». How does that work? It's just that I am an emotional/mental masochist, not a «physical» one. Yup, there are indeed many different people and many different likings in BDSM .

Quote:
Originally Posted by 444
So, are you the type that find Pain as a major turn-on, and find it a must during sexual or BDSM exchanges? Or maybe you're fine with a little pain here and there, enjoy it, but not a major part of your 'Behind the Scene' life?
Like I mentioned above, I'm not really what is commonly called a «pain slut» so, no, pain is definitely not a must. It can, depending on what type of pain or on the situation, be a turn on but for me it's more the mental aspect of being controled or even better being forced, that I find appealing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 444
Is your tolerance for pain high or low?
My pain tolerance varies and changes just like my interests does. When I was younger and exploring I was much more into pain than I am now. Like many others, when I was newer to BDSM and starting dipping my toes into it I was seeking sensations. The stronger, the better. Of course, pain is a very effective way to produce such strong sensations so heavy spankings and the likes were a «yummy» for me. But the last couple of years I've been into a serious relationship and when you get to know someone and get closer you become more open to go to places you haven't before and explore other aspects that you may never had thought of. As my interests for some other things and activities got stronger, pain became less interesting and, by the same occasion, my tolerance diminished as well. It still has it's place just a less important one.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nixie
And the more I'm marked the prouder I am to wear the marks...
Thanks for mentioning it, Nixie! Yes, for me, bruises and marks are one of the main purposes of pain, especially spankings. For example, I don't really like using hairbrushes for spankings. For a bit, I'm fine but my tolerance is a lot lower and with other things like belts etc. However, I will get along fine with it because that's the way I have the most chances of having tangible and visible reminders the next day During play, I often imagine what it would look like the next day and if it's less or worse if I don't have bruises I'm really disappointed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nixie
My tolerance is high. In that aspect. Is other aspects it is not. ie... I hate cramps... But what woman doesn't. Being tied and at the mercy of a whip or paddle its just I don't know how to describe it... Ecstasy... I guess. When it all settles to a numbing pleasure. That tingles over your nerve endings. I just like it I guess.

Without the pain it isn't really arousing I guess. Unless Im really "In the Mood" I suppose. Or I'm not given the choice in the matter.

And cuz it is high is doesn't mean I'm less sensitive to it just means I can handle it. Endure it longer that I suppose most can. Maybe... I think... Don't quote me there. Not sure how others feel on that aspect though.
What you're saying here makes perfect sense and isn't uncommon at all When aroused, or in subspace, the body/ brain release endorphins, adrenaline and a bunch of other chemicals that does make pain more pleasurable and/or tolerable. Which is why a sub will sometimes find themselves being to take a lot more than they would under normal circumstances. Of course, this is even more true for masochists and why it doesn't work that way for those who find pain a turn off since they aren't excited or aroused by it.
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