Quote:
Originally Posted by RiskyFlame
My advise to you is to talk to her about these activities. If she gets upset when you initiate these activities (whatever they include), then don't initiate them. Don't force her to do the activities with you.
If she says that she likes spanking and bondage, I wonder if she ever said this explicitly. If so, then this is a good first step for talking to her. Why does she like these things and would she be willing to try more?
So put otherwise, don't continue these activities unless she wants to as well. Tell her that you'd like to try some kinky stuff with her and only with her consent you can continue and try things.
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This. Double This.
Quote:
Originally Posted by msesi
I know what you are saying. But.
I am talking about new things. Things she does not really know if she likes. And I am not talking about "extreme" kinks.
And every time I ask her for something, she is always like "No". And after a short while, we do try it and she loves it.
I feel it is a shame. She can have much stronger orgasms if we try more.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by msesi
What you did not understand from my posts above, is not that I want to do something to her that she does not like.
. . .
What I am looking for, is a way to make her have more orgasms. Stronger orgasms. More fun in general. And I feel that she somehow denies me that, by not being open to new things.
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Have you communicated this to her before? What you want: trying new things, more fun, and creating a better experience; but only continuing things that she's comfortable with? Do you guys have a safe word set up-- or is it otherwise clear that she can choose to stop if it becomes too much? What
has she said, asides from no?
I don't know you or your girlfriend, but it may be a good idea to talk with her about the new things she ended up liking, seeing if she's open to continuing trying more, and asking her how she'd like to proceed, regarding that. I wouldn't rush her regarding this-- probably explicitly giving her time to think it over. She's trying new things, just had her first orgasm, and may still be processing it and how if its in, mentally (and/or physically).