That's so funny, although I can imagine you might have wanted to slap him
My latest purchase was a chain and a code lock. Sir and I have an online relationship, so the code lock allows him to really lock me up. I can set a code myself without looking, take a picture without looking and send it to him. He checks if he can read the code and then I throw away the pic and email, leaving me completely at his mercy.
I had to ask for help, cutting a length of chain. The "helpful" assistant then went on to advise me about locks. Saying a padlock would be better, as the code lock is normally used for luggage. I swear he knew, my face was burning like crazy the whole time I was in that store
I should add that I have a pair of very strong pliers at hand, to cut the chain if nessecary. I trust my owner, but in case of emergency, I need to be able to free myself.