Nice start, but may I say that punctuation, capitalisation, and spelling to a long way on this forum especially when creating stories. I like the title -- something different and inviting.
As for specific introductions of characters, I think they are best worked into the story rather than specifically listing them as an aside. As the story unfolds, the reader then learns what traits each character has, often times making the inferences on their own; allowing the user to 'connect the dots' in places helps to bind them to the story better than does feeding them every last bit of information.
Have fun and keep writing!
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Lizard !
Likes: Humilliation, CD, marginally risky dares, outdoor/public, self bondage, pee/diapers
HARD Limits: dangerous, perminant, feces, directly involving people/family, long dares, cutting/blood, food play/messy, nudity, pics, animals
Boring, so don't bother: wedgies, edging
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