[Officelover]

As far as I’m concerned, I woke up one day without a clitoris. I don’t know how many days, or weeks, it was after my affair with Ozer. I don’t remember much that happened after Morigana came in.

I think it’s best that way.

Sure, I imagine it. I can imagine being tied down, hospital style, my legs spread apart. I know what had to have happened—I can picture Morigana as she did it. She wouldn’t smile, she wouldn’t cry… she would be utterly silent. I don’t know to this day if she gave me something to knock me unconscious or if I passed out from the pain. I don’t quite care to.

I will stick to the facts. One day, I had a clitoris; time passed, and then I didn’t. One day, I might have found love with Ozer—I’ll never know, and there’s no use conjecturing now as to whether or not I would have kept seeing him. But there was one inchoate moment of passion, just as there had been the first time I felt the Child before me. And it was stillborn.

I was marked from that day forward. Even the rapists knew something had changed in me. They couldn’t bring themselves to do it anymore—no one wants to fuck a mutilated cunt. I was ruined. At least before I was used… now I was ignored? No one bothered to rape me anymore.

The librarians were worried. They noticed the stream of suitors drying up, and they tried everything to get them to come in and use me. But the general public seemed to think there was nothing left to do. Finally, the head librarian had the bright idea of making me the library’s official toilet. At least I would have a use. I did that for a while, drinking piss and eating shit. I didn’t complain; I’d done it all before.

Then one fine day I realized something, and I’ll tell it to you: no one was keeping me there. There was nothing binding me to Omelas. There wasn’t anything left to say, or do, or cry about. So one night I packed three day’s worth of food I stole and set out. I didn’t steal clothes—I was naked as the day I was born, as I had been since the day they made me a Child

I didn’t know what lay before me, or what I could expect. I’d never ventured outside of Omelas before; no one had. No reason to. But the way I saw it, there was no reason to stay either.












A big thank you to all of you who read and supported me. The ending might seem abrupt, and it's meant to be so. I hope you enjoyed the story, and I hope you enjoyed these characters as much as I did. If anyone wants to talk about the themes of the story, I would be delighted to chat, either on the thread or through PM.