Sadism.
Posted 09-20-2017 at 02:37 AM by AbusiveMaster
The following represents my own thoughts and feelings only. Naturally I am 100% correct in everything I think, do and say, but differing opinions may exist.
I am not a masochist, not even slightly. In fact, I am an utter wimp when it comes to any sort of pain. But I sort of understand the why of masochism. I am aware of the neurochemical responses which can lead to a natural high. I am cognisant of the release of emotional tension through controlled and safe pain. I get that there is a challenge involved in seeing how far you can be pushed. It makes sense to me that these factors, combined with a submissive personality can lead to a very rewarding and satisfying experience.
What I don't understand is sadism, or at least not fully. Facets of it make sense to me. I love control - but there are other ways of exerting control. I enjoy pushing my sub to her limits - but again, there are more effective ways of doing this (especially when your sub is a little painslut.) I am aware that sadism and masochism are co-dependant, flip sides of the same coin and that one could not viably exist without the other.
What I don't get though is how whacking someone hard enough to make them scream and run away is enough to give me an instant erection. ( I realise not everyone wants to think of me with an erection. Those of you who want to get rid of the unwanted mental image may take a few moments contemplating politics. Donald Trump publically stated that he would be 'with' his daughter if she were not his daughter - feel better?)
I am not, in my everyday life, a particularly cruel person. Well, not massively cruel. Admittedly I have an overdeveloped appreciation of schadenfreude, and a dark sense of humour, but I am not cruel to animals, I help elderly people up stairs or onto busses. I am in essence a decent, if flawed person, much the same as everyone else.
And yet.
I take immense mental, and physical, pleasure in causing pain, discomfort and humiliation in others. The more I care for someone, the greater the pleasure I take in torturing them physically and mentally. Yes, it is in a very controlled way. Yes, I make very very sure that I do no lasting harm or emotional damage.
But I have been asked several times why I enjoy the things I do, and the bottom line answer to that is that I simply do not know. I know the psychology, I know the textbook answers, but they are all lacking, none of them actually explain sadism.
There was a famous case, a few years ago, not regarding sadism, but cannibalism. Two people met online, one of them a cannibal, the other someone who wanted to be eaten. They met up, and the victim was killed and eaten - quite consentually. The only real difference between this and a sadomasochistic relationship is, in essence, that I very rarely kill my victims. Hardly ever. Obviously this is a very extreme example, but stripped down to the essentials it is essentially the same thing. (I am not endorsing cannibalism, if you eat another human being, with or without their consent, I bear no responsibility or liability for the act.)
I have known myself to be sadistic and Dominant for approaching twenty years now, which is a frighteningly long period of time. I have considered this matter several times, followed hundreds of lines of thought. The answer boils down to this.
"Shut up, bend over, and pull down your pants."
I am not a masochist, not even slightly. In fact, I am an utter wimp when it comes to any sort of pain. But I sort of understand the why of masochism. I am aware of the neurochemical responses which can lead to a natural high. I am cognisant of the release of emotional tension through controlled and safe pain. I get that there is a challenge involved in seeing how far you can be pushed. It makes sense to me that these factors, combined with a submissive personality can lead to a very rewarding and satisfying experience.
What I don't understand is sadism, or at least not fully. Facets of it make sense to me. I love control - but there are other ways of exerting control. I enjoy pushing my sub to her limits - but again, there are more effective ways of doing this (especially when your sub is a little painslut.) I am aware that sadism and masochism are co-dependant, flip sides of the same coin and that one could not viably exist without the other.
What I don't get though is how whacking someone hard enough to make them scream and run away is enough to give me an instant erection. ( I realise not everyone wants to think of me with an erection. Those of you who want to get rid of the unwanted mental image may take a few moments contemplating politics. Donald Trump publically stated that he would be 'with' his daughter if she were not his daughter - feel better?)
I am not, in my everyday life, a particularly cruel person. Well, not massively cruel. Admittedly I have an overdeveloped appreciation of schadenfreude, and a dark sense of humour, but I am not cruel to animals, I help elderly people up stairs or onto busses. I am in essence a decent, if flawed person, much the same as everyone else.
And yet.
I take immense mental, and physical, pleasure in causing pain, discomfort and humiliation in others. The more I care for someone, the greater the pleasure I take in torturing them physically and mentally. Yes, it is in a very controlled way. Yes, I make very very sure that I do no lasting harm or emotional damage.
But I have been asked several times why I enjoy the things I do, and the bottom line answer to that is that I simply do not know. I know the psychology, I know the textbook answers, but they are all lacking, none of them actually explain sadism.
There was a famous case, a few years ago, not regarding sadism, but cannibalism. Two people met online, one of them a cannibal, the other someone who wanted to be eaten. They met up, and the victim was killed and eaten - quite consentually. The only real difference between this and a sadomasochistic relationship is, in essence, that I very rarely kill my victims. Hardly ever. Obviously this is a very extreme example, but stripped down to the essentials it is essentially the same thing. (I am not endorsing cannibalism, if you eat another human being, with or without their consent, I bear no responsibility or liability for the act.)
I have known myself to be sadistic and Dominant for approaching twenty years now, which is a frighteningly long period of time. I have considered this matter several times, followed hundreds of lines of thought. The answer boils down to this.
"Shut up, bend over, and pull down your pants."
Total Comments 5
Comments
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So I also wondered why watching someone get beat or humiliated made my pussy so wet. If you find the answer hit me up.Posted 09-20-2017 at 05:41 AM by Heart 
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I never wondered, I just knew that I enjoyed both seeing it (yay, porn!) and imagining that I was the girl getting the torture / punishment. (I'm weird.)Posted 09-20-2017 at 06:37 AM by Blue Fox
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I have recently come to the realization that I am a sadist. I guess I have probably always known I had that part in me. I used to love watching things like fear factor where people would have to do something so scary and gross and they would be an emotional wreck. I can't say it turned me on, but I loved the thrill of it! It has taken me a long time to accept it and embrace it, but I too cannot understand it.
I have to say that sometimes I struggle with the thought, but I have been trying to just do it and enjoy it rather than obsess over why I enjoy it. And I found that makes it easier to embrace.
But like Aimee said .. if you ever find the answer, please let me know!Posted 09-20-2017 at 09:33 AM by Butterfly
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Very good blog! I don't understand sadism either. But I don't understand masochism, which I enjoy, either. Maybe masochism IS a little easier to understand, but still. Why would someone willingly have oneself be tortured?
And why would you, if you care for someone, torture them?
It is really strange.
All of BDSM is really strange if you think of it.
But people are strange.
Life is strange.
But lets not get too philosophical now and just continue to beat each other up!Posted 09-20-2017 at 09:37 AM by Jaro
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Since my reply got a bit long, i decided to write a blog myself.
Thanks for the blog.
Thoughts on this have been floating through my mind for a long timePosted 09-20-2017 at 01:23 PM by sir sam
