Welcome to getDare
Join the latest fashion of Promises.
Ever tried one of my fap roulettes?
Did you know about PM dares? A nice and gentle way to start playing here.
You can get a lot of PM dares by sending them in the PM dare bashing game.
Join the latest fashion of Promises.
Ever tried one of my fap roulettes?
Did you know about PM dares? A nice and gentle way to start playing here.
You can get a lot of PM dares by sending them in the PM dare bashing game.
Mistress seeking male, submissive slave
Tags mistress, pattern, sand traps, seek, slave
Before getDare I had my time and experience in the German BDSM community of 'Sklavenzentrale,' which translates into "slave central". Everywhere there seems to be an old pattern: billions of willing, male slaves, desperately looking for a true mistress accepting their pleas to serve. Right behind them, there are millions of willing, female slaves desperately looking for a real master taking on their offers. I have no verified data at hand, but it seems to be the anxiousness of rejection puts a majority of us into submissive preferences rather than in the dominating once. Frequently, I recognize poor fellow humans who reduced to once or three of their supposed body parts and therefore spammed with countless requests ranging from silly to rude, often ignoring everything they carefully stated in their profile, signature, forum posts and blog entries. Shame! To a lesser degree, this effect even crosses gender barriers.
That's why I feel dared to help YOU to apply to a mistress or master like me successfully. If you suffer from annoying requests, I'd like to pad you on the back and inspire you to express your trouble, vocalize it for others to be heard, exchange, share the burden and possibly find solutions or at least educate some people to be less annoying at least. We are all in this together.
To be frankly, I get slave offers, mistress and master requests in probably much fewer numbers than others. Most often it starts with a simple 'Hi' in the Kik messenger, a medium I judge preferably used for quicker exchange in disregard of any texts older than five seconds. Most annoying for me is 'asl,' which means "age, sex, location," in more honest but rude words: "How fuckable are you?". Most often I reply with another 'Hi' and a smiley if my contact is polite enough to wait for an answer before dropping a brick. Some are smart enough to state how I got their attention or how they got my Kik contact, pretty much like in a phone call when you first state who you are and why you call. It's creepy if someone calls without saying anything after the greeting. So don't do that. If I am in a bad mood, I might already set you on ignore right here. Some day I don't waste my energy with such people. Then there they go, never trouble me anymore, having lost their chance on me once and for all.
Most make it to second base and start some small talk or push a kinky topic right off. Sometimes the contact is good and picks up something from me. Some compliment me on one of my pictures. Some tell me how they felt about a story I wrote or another blog entry. Some mention a game or another thread by me they have seen. Others point towards some information on my profile, my Likes, Dislikes, Limits, my PM dares, my rules as a Dom or sub. I revealed a lot of details to me as long as you dare to look and take the time and effort. In any case, this makes me aware that they have read, a serious difference to many others. But if they ask me simple questions answered on the very first look at my profile, they are up to getting ignored. Usually, I still point them towards my profile. If my contacts then refuse, it's a "Goodbye."
In general, I put up gates to protect me as well as others have. You find more details here. Anyone who tries to sneak around them gets thrown out of my universe. A relationship takes effort, even for a short kinky quickie. If you show me that you think it wasn't or if you are not willed to do what's needed, it doesn't work for me. Good luck finding another partner, but I doubt you will, at least not until you change your attitude. If I wouldn't care for you at all, you still had to be worth my time and effort, more so than other people, and more so than other activities. I don't have to bear with you at all costs. If you indicate you are not worthy, I will probably drop you very soon. As I have revealed there are several sand traps for you to do so. It's always if you try to do the next step before the previous step, like asking for a picture or physical details too early, skipping the small talk or the foreplay, refuse to read up and listen, which means change yourself. You haven't listened until something in you has changed. On the other hand, taking one step at a time, coming back the next day for the next steps, show up reliably, communicate, all these experiences build up trust, which always leads to something.
And just to be on the safe side with this entry, this is not a usual ad. Maybe I tricked you with the title, but then it needed to be.
My regards to Andreja Pejic. If you found it worth reading, here is how you find any Mistress, Master, sub, slave or play partner you want.
That's why I feel dared to help YOU to apply to a mistress or master like me successfully. If you suffer from annoying requests, I'd like to pad you on the back and inspire you to express your trouble, vocalize it for others to be heard, exchange, share the burden and possibly find solutions or at least educate some people to be less annoying at least. We are all in this together.
To be frankly, I get slave offers, mistress and master requests in probably much fewer numbers than others. Most often it starts with a simple 'Hi' in the Kik messenger, a medium I judge preferably used for quicker exchange in disregard of any texts older than five seconds. Most annoying for me is 'asl,' which means "age, sex, location," in more honest but rude words: "How fuckable are you?". Most often I reply with another 'Hi' and a smiley if my contact is polite enough to wait for an answer before dropping a brick. Some are smart enough to state how I got their attention or how they got my Kik contact, pretty much like in a phone call when you first state who you are and why you call. It's creepy if someone calls without saying anything after the greeting. So don't do that. If I am in a bad mood, I might already set you on ignore right here. Some day I don't waste my energy with such people. Then there they go, never trouble me anymore, having lost their chance on me once and for all.
Most make it to second base and start some small talk or push a kinky topic right off. Sometimes the contact is good and picks up something from me. Some compliment me on one of my pictures. Some tell me how they felt about a story I wrote or another blog entry. Some mention a game or another thread by me they have seen. Others point towards some information on my profile, my Likes, Dislikes, Limits, my PM dares, my rules as a Dom or sub. I revealed a lot of details to me as long as you dare to look and take the time and effort. In any case, this makes me aware that they have read, a serious difference to many others. But if they ask me simple questions answered on the very first look at my profile, they are up to getting ignored. Usually, I still point them towards my profile. If my contacts then refuse, it's a "Goodbye."
In general, I put up gates to protect me as well as others have. You find more details here. Anyone who tries to sneak around them gets thrown out of my universe. A relationship takes effort, even for a short kinky quickie. If you show me that you think it wasn't or if you are not willed to do what's needed, it doesn't work for me. Good luck finding another partner, but I doubt you will, at least not until you change your attitude. If I wouldn't care for you at all, you still had to be worth my time and effort, more so than other people, and more so than other activities. I don't have to bear with you at all costs. If you indicate you are not worthy, I will probably drop you very soon. As I have revealed there are several sand traps for you to do so. It's always if you try to do the next step before the previous step, like asking for a picture or physical details too early, skipping the small talk or the foreplay, refuse to read up and listen, which means change yourself. You haven't listened until something in you has changed. On the other hand, taking one step at a time, coming back the next day for the next steps, show up reliably, communicate, all these experiences build up trust, which always leads to something.
And just to be on the safe side with this entry, this is not a usual ad. Maybe I tricked you with the title, but then it needed to be.
My regards to Andreja Pejic. If you found it worth reading, here is how you find any Mistress, Master, sub, slave or play partner you want.Total Comments 11
Comments
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Wow, I have to say very well said. I agree with so much of that, it's crazy.
Firstly, I agree about the part people turning to submissive because they are scared of being rejected.
I concur about the way to approach but I have an issue that I would like to add. The things you described are the way I usually PM others. Research about them from posts and not ask anything that their posts haven't as a way to show seriousness but most of the time despite putting so much effort, I get nil response. I spend upto 30 mins writing a PM but can't get a response, not even a No thank you.
And I honestly do follow the respect & the details you talked about. What do you think?Posted 01-04-2017 at 08:23 AM by subjoe 
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Very well written. I hope alot of people will read this and think about it. It annoys me as well. But to defend some of them, I think they are just shy and dont know how to start a conversation like that. For me. Its kinda hard to start a conversation with a mistress, because I dont really know how to draw her attention or be interesting for her. After reading this I understood a lil bit more about the thinking of Master/mistresses. It helped me and I wanna say thank You for that.
I've been on this site for about 4 years and I learned alot here. First I've met a Switch-girl and we had alot of fun and swapped pics. Then I was just goofing around after she left the site. And now I grew up a bit more and know how to deal with this site and I hope I will get a lil more popular.
Thank You Cass, for sharing.
Greetings
PhilPosted 01-04-2017 at 08:32 AM by Controol
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Thank you. I am happy it found your appreciation and comments so quickly.
@subjoe: I think I am going to cover in a future blog post you inspired me to. Thanks for that.
@Phil: I appreciate you defending others. There are always two sides of the medal. I also don't want to offend or attack anyone. People are how they are for a reason. Besides putting people on my ignore list for selfish but valid reasons I generally prefer to educate others to change the world.Posted 01-04-2017 at 08:52 AM by CSasha
Updated 06-18-2017 at 03:55 PM by CSasha -
Posted 01-05-2017 at 01:06 PM by CSasha
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I finally took the time to read this. Thank you for your we'll thought out words. I certainly understand the shyness. I'm glad that I have found a way to push past it... Usually.Posted 01-10-2017 at 02:00 PM by Lola Bunny
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I am also glad you did. There are always too extremes of everything.
Posted 01-11-2017 at 03:47 PM by CSasha
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Is it odd that in the end I find this to be a fairly persuasive ad for "Mistress seeking male, submissive slave" because it makes the point of being a thoughtful and comprehensive person, not to be approached randomly or casually. Its not just a caricature behind this article/ad and not someone looking for one thing only, its a real person with depth. It warns that the writer is real and though online is very much like anyone would be that we meet in daily life. This advertises (and cautions) reality and relationship building. It wins me over!
I guess that shows how well the article (not the ad) also makes the points it wants to about being real, about finding out about the person, about having something to talk about, and about being real yourself. Well donePosted 01-11-2017 at 05:53 PM by MarvHarvey
Updated 01-12-2017 at 03:14 AM by MarvHarvey -
Thank you. I just come from a wonderful online session with another user which proved me how best this attitude serves my experiences. Such lovely beings. It's much more pleasurable if it's not only about some body parts for a brief moment until orgasm and relief, but about a connection between two or more characters.
Posted 01-11-2017 at 05:58 PM by CSasha
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I think in the end, that the human connections are more fun than it seems like the task giving and doing. I enjoy things more when the task is given to me by someone I know. When I report to them, it feels like I almost get to share a bit of what I felt, and then get to relive it through their reaction. It's the people that really make it special, not the actions. I think that a lot of users don't get that.Posted 01-11-2017 at 10:02 PM by ColdToes
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So true. Thanks for that contribution. Lots of people are missing out so much. I hope most of them get it sooner or later. Fortunately, I already know some cute belly buttons who do know.
Posted 01-12-2017 at 03:08 AM by CSasha
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what an intresting "story" to read. it makes so much sense if you base things about mutual respect and a true connection. Making it all so much more worth while. Well Written!
Posted 06-05-2017 at 09:17 AM by Sletje_Marco
