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sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 02:09 PM
This is my first story so please tell me how i am doing.

Characters...
-Charlie (16 years old, B cup breasts, 5'3, normally keeps to herself, Codi's twin sister)
- Codi (16 years old, B cup breasts, 5'3, Outgoing, Charlies twin sister)
- Luke (17 years old, Athletic body, 6'0, Charlies crush)
-Sam (17 years old, Athletic, 5'10, snobby)



Chapter 1
Charlie sat in the back of the classroom hardly paying attention to the teacher. All she wanted was for the bell to ring it would then be christmas break they would have atleast 3 weeks off this time. It was about a quater till 3:00. She sat dreaming about Luke who was on the football team and her major crush.
"Yo, Sis... you better pay attention..." Said Codi as she pointed to the board with her pencil. "I will not help you with your test nor will i let you cheat." Codi faced herself back toward the board. All Charlie could do or wanted to do was get out of school. Finally the bell rang and everyone ran out the door including Charlie and Codi. As Charlie got onto the bus to go home she went to the very back as she always did. She watched out the window waiting for Luke to come on. She watched her sister yammer on about what she was doing over christmas break. She then felt someone flop down beside her.
It was Luke.....

thefunman
04-26-2010, 02:14 PM
I like it so far pretty good. I want to read more!!!!;)

Star Shadows
04-26-2010, 02:15 PM
Good start should be interesting.

Matt Uk
04-26-2010, 02:39 PM
Good start, please do carry it on :)

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 03:03 PM
I like it so far pretty good. I want to read more!!!!;)

Good start should be interesting.

Good start, please do carry it on :)

I will do chapter 2 later tonite after i atleast get 2 more responses

sekai
04-26-2010, 03:04 PM
One respons for you :p Can't wait for more :)

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 03:32 PM
Chapter 1
Charlie sat in the back of the classroom hardly paying attention to the teacher. All she wanted was for the bell to ring it would then be christmas break they would have atleast 3 weeks off this time. It was about a quater till 3:00. She sat dreaming about Luke who was on the football team and her major crush.
"Yo, Sis... you better pay attention..." Said Codi as she pointed to the board with her pencil. "I will not help you with your test nor will i let you cheat." Codi faced herself back toward the board. All Charlie could do or wanted to do was get out of school. Finally the bell rang and everyone ran out the door including Charlie and Codi. As Charlie got onto the bus to go home she went to the very back as she always did. She watched out the window waiting for Luke to come on. She watched her sister yammer on about what she was doing over christmas break. She then felt someone flop down beside her.
It was Luke.....

Chapter 2
Charlie looked over at the guy she had a crush for years. She was stunned he had sat next to her as he has never sat with her before. "Hey Charlie, Cat got your tongue?" Luke said as he smiled at her. She smiled back and blushed a slight it not knowing exactly what to say. "Say, Me and Sam are having a party tonite.. Maybe you and your sister should come over. It will only be us four." Charlie looked out the window at her sister who was now walking onto the bus. "Sure, I guess if its alright with my parents." She got off the bus with her sister at her stop and looked back at the last seat to see Luke staring back at her. "So, Codi What you say we go over to Luke's for a party?" Said Charlie. "Well Ok I guess." Said Codie. Charlie then ran upstairs and laid on her bed dreaming of what she wanted to do tonite, trying to figure out why in the world Luke would ask her to go to his house. Finally it reached 5:00. Charlie and Codi headed down to Lukes house and knocked on the door waiting for an answer.

Matt Uk
04-26-2010, 03:50 PM
I'm still liking it, it's a nice pace. However maybe longer posts so there is a bit more to read? :)

molten man
04-26-2010, 03:58 PM
Nice start!! Keep it going!!

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 06:10 PM
I'm still liking it, it's a nice pace. However maybe longer posts so there is a bit more to read? :)

I am sorry i am new to writing stories

Matt Uk
04-26-2010, 06:11 PM
I am sorry i am new to writing stories

No problem :)
And your making a very good start to it :D

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 06:15 PM
No problem :)
And your making a very good start to it :D

Thank you i may continue it tonite... may get to chapter 5 idk...

Matt Uk
04-26-2010, 06:15 PM
Thank you i may continue it tonite... may get to chapter 5 idk...

Haha hope so :D

I'm very much looking forward to reading more

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 06:36 PM
Chapter 1
Charlie sat in the back of the classroom hardly paying attention to the teacher. All she wanted was for the bell to ring it would then be christmas break they would have atleast 3 weeks off this time. It was about a quater till 3:00. She sat dreaming about Luke who was on the football team and her major crush.
"Yo, Sis... you better pay attention..." Said Codi as she pointed to the board with her pencil. "I will not help you with your test nor will i let you cheat." Codi faced herself back toward the board. All Charlie could do or wanted to do was get out of school. Finally the bell rang and everyone ran out the door including Charlie and Codi. As Charlie got onto the bus to go home she went to the very back as she always did. She watched out the window waiting for Luke to come on. She watched her sister yammer on about what she was doing over christmas break. She then felt someone flop down beside her.
It was Luke.....

Chapter 2
Charlie looked over at the guy she had a crush for years. She was stunned he had sat next to her as he has never sat with her before. "Hey Charlie, Cat got your tongue?" Luke said as he smiled at her. She smiled back and blushed a slight it not knowing exactly what to say. "Say, Me and Sam are having a party tonite.. Maybe you and your sister should come over. It will only be us four." Charlie looked out the window at her sister who was now walking onto the bus. "Sure, I guess if its alright with my parents." She got off the bus with her sister at her stop and looked back at the last seat to see Luke staring back at her. "So, Codi What you say we go over to Luke's for a party?" Said Charlie. "Well Ok I guess." Said Codie. Charlie then ran upstairs and laid on her bed dreaming of what she wanted to do tonite, trying to figure out why in the world Luke would ask her to go to his house. Finally it reached 5:00. Charlie and Codi headed down to Lukes house and knocked on the door waiting for an answer.

Chapter 3
After about 5 minutes of waiting Luke came and answered the door. "Hey girls. Welcome." Luke said as he took the girls coats and laid them neatly on teh hooks. "We are just up in my room playing a game." Luke took the girls up to his room. "So girls would yall like to play truth or dare?" Said Sam as the 3 walked in. The girls sat down opposite each other. "Sure..." Said Codi. "I guess." Said Charlie. "There is only 1 rule. If you do not want to answer for truth or do the dare you must take a punishment that the other 3 decide on." Said Sam. They all agreed. "Then the game begins" Said Luke. Charlie spoke up softly. "Who goes first?" Codi raised her hand as if she was eager to answer a question. "Meeeee!" They laughed at her. "Ok it will be you, Sam, Charlie, then me." Said Luke. "Ok Truth or dare sam?" Codi said with a smile. "I pick truth." Sam replied. "How far have you gone with a girl??" Sam replied. "Only kissing." Codi looked over at look Luke. "My turn." Said Sam. "So Charlie truth or dare?" Charlies eyes widened a bit as she was not expecting to be asked nor invited. "Truth." She replied in a soft voice. "Hmmm, Who do you have a crush on at school?" Charlie looked up at him a bit frightened at the question. She studdered to answer. "U...u...uhhh L...l...luke." She blushed a bit. Everyone started to laugh but Charlie and Luke. Charlie had tears in her eyes. She got up and ran out. She went down stairs and out the back door and sat in teh middle of the yard crying her eyes out. A few minutes later Luke came out and sat infront of her. "You really have a crush on me?" He said wiping her eyes free of the tears. She nodded and looked at him. Luke slowly leaned in to kiss her. Her eyes widened and she leaned back as she has never really been kissed nor had a boyfriend ever. Luke looked at her then pulled her into his chest hugging her tight letting her know he was always there for her when she needed him.

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 06:38 PM
Haha hope so :D

I'm very much looking forward to reading more

I posted more check it out

Matt Uk
04-26-2010, 06:40 PM
Yet Another excellent chapter :D

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 06:45 PM
Yet Another excellent chapter :D

Thank you i figured id put a little twist into it and not make it just a truth or dare story like most on here and put something else into it

Matt Uk
04-26-2010, 07:02 PM
Thank you i figured id put a little twist into it and not make it just a truth or dare story like most on here and put something else into it

Personally I think the stories are better when they have twists in them, also when they don't turn out into Blackmail slave stories. Pretty much EVERY story on this site turns into blackmail :(
It just gets boring and predictable lol

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 07:16 PM
Personally I think the stories are better when they have twists in them, also when they don't turn out into Blackmail slave stories. Pretty much EVERY story on this site turns into blackmail :(
It just gets boring and predictable lol

I know......rite :O lol so

Matt Uk
04-26-2010, 07:22 PM
I know......rite :O lol so

Next chapter? :D lol :p

sydneyyy93
04-26-2010, 07:26 PM
Next chapter? :D lol :p

Ill do next chapter tomorrow I get out early and yea

Demon Thief
04-26-2010, 10:20 PM
Amazing story so far.

Personally I think the stories are better when they have twists in them, also when they don't turn out into Blackmail slave stories. Pretty much EVERY story on this site turns into blackmail :(
It just gets boring and predictable lol

I think I'm slightly guilty of that one... :(

Matt Uk
04-27-2010, 01:22 AM
Amazing story so far.



I think I'm slightly guilty of that one... :(

Lol your baby sitting one was interesting though. And it wasn;t the blackmail of, "I have this ONE picture of you - which could slightly humiliate you not ruin your life - and so your my bitch till you die basically" << Just so far fetched, if someone had a naked pic of me I wouldn't care who they showed tbh :p

sydneyyy93
04-27-2010, 04:25 AM
Amazing story so far.



I think I'm slightly guilty of that one... :(

Thats ok they are still good stories dont be sad Demon Thief

sydneyyy93
04-27-2010, 04:26 AM
Lol your baby sitting one was interesting though. And it wasn;t the blackmail of, "I have this ONE picture of you - which could slightly humiliate you not ruin your life - and so your my bitch till you die basically" << Just so far fetched, if someone had a naked pic of me I wouldn't care who they showed tbh :p

Matt dont be mean!!! If he wants to write his story like that then he can

sydneyyy93
04-27-2010, 04:27 AM
I will be trying to write the Next Chapter when i get home from school today

thefunman
04-27-2010, 07:45 AM
Good so far keep going please. You are doing good.

sydneyyy93
04-27-2010, 01:15 PM
Chapter 1
Charlie sat in the back of the classroom hardly paying attention to the teacher. All she wanted was for the bell to ring it would then be christmas break they would have atleast 3 weeks off this time. It was about a quater till 3:00. She sat dreaming about Luke who was on the football team and her major crush.
"Yo, Sis... you better pay attention..." Said Codi as she pointed to the board with her pencil. "I will not help you with your test nor will i let you cheat." Codi faced herself back toward the board. All Charlie could do or wanted to do was get out of school. Finally the bell rang and everyone ran out the door including Charlie and Codi. As Charlie got onto the bus to go home she went to the very back as she always did. She watched out the window waiting for Luke to come on. She watched her sister yammer on about what she was doing over christmas break. She then felt someone flop down beside her.
It was Luke.....

Chapter 2
Charlie looked over at the guy she had a crush for years. She was stunned he had sat next to her as he has never sat with her before. "Hey Charlie, Cat got your tongue?" Luke said as he smiled at her. She smiled back and blushed a slight it not knowing exactly what to say. "Say, Me and Sam are having a party tonite.. Maybe you and your sister should come over. It will only be us four." Charlie looked out the window at her sister who was now walking onto the bus. "Sure, I guess if its alright with my parents." She got off the bus with her sister at her stop and looked back at the last seat to see Luke staring back at her. "So, Codi What you say we go over to Luke's for a party?" Said Charlie. "Well Ok I guess." Said Codie. Charlie then ran upstairs and laid on her bed dreaming of what she wanted to do tonite, trying to figure out why in the world Luke would ask her to go to his house. Finally it reached 5:00. Charlie and Codi headed down to Lukes house and knocked on the door waiting for an answer.

Chapter 3
After about 5 minutes of waiting Luke came and answered the door. "Hey girls. Welcome." Luke said as he took the girls coats and laid them neatly on teh hooks. "We are just up in my room playing a game." Luke took the girls up to his room. "So girls would yall like to play truth or dare?" Said Sam as the 3 walked in. The girls sat down opposite each other. "Sure..." Said Codi. "I guess." Said Charlie. "There is only 1 rule. If you do not want to answer for truth or do the dare you must take a punishment that the other 3 decide on." Said Sam. They all agreed. "Then the game begins" Said Luke. Charlie spoke up softly. "Who goes first?" Codi raised her hand as if she was eager to answer a question. "Meeeee!" They laughed at her. "Ok it will be you, Sam, Charlie, then me." Said Luke. "Ok Truth or dare sam?" Codi said with a smile. "I pick truth." Sam replied. "How far have you gone with a girl??" Sam replied. "Only kissing." Codi looked over at look Luke. "My turn." Said Sam. "So Charlie truth or dare?" Charlies eyes widened a bit as she was not expecting to be asked nor invited. "Truth." She replied in a soft voice. "Hmmm, Who do you have a crush on at school?" Charlie looked up at him a bit frightened at the question. She studdered to answer. "U...u...uhhh L...l...luke." She blushed a bit. Everyone started to laugh but Charlie and Luke. Charlie had tears in her eyes. She got up and ran out. She went down stairs and out the back door and sat in teh middle of the yard crying her eyes out. A few minutes later Luke came out and sat infront of her. "You really have a crush on me?" He said wiping her eyes free of the tears. She nodded and looked at him. Luke slowly leaned in to kiss her. Her eyes widened and she leaned back as she has never really been kissed nor had a boyfriend ever. Luke looked at her then pulled her into his chest hugging her tight letting her know he was always there for her when she needed him.

Chapter 4
Charlie slowly got up and headed for the swing set. She sat on a swing and Luke came behind her and pushed her softly. "Sorry about Sam, hes a snobby one." Luke smiled at her. "But I have to say that I like you too." He said as he stopped the swings and looked into her eyes. Charlie looked back up into his. Luke leaned in about to kiss her when she suddenly jumped at the sound of thunder clapping.They both looked up at the sky as it started to rain. Charlie got up from the swing chair and stood infront of him. She was still looking up and Luke looked down at her. She looked at him as he leaned down and kissed her. They both closed their eyes. Their clothes were soaked from the rain. They looked at each other after He pulled away. She had a slight blush on her cheeks and he giggled and kissed her cheek. They both held hands as they walked back into the house. Charlie walked into Lukes bedroom her makeup was running down her cheeks. She sat back down next to Luke. "So shall we continue?" Said Sam as he and Codi looked at Luke and Charlie.

Matt Uk
04-27-2010, 01:55 PM
Awwwww :)
Passionate rain kiss, used often but can not be beaten :D
Still loving it :D
Keep it up

sydneyyy93
04-28-2010, 03:24 PM
Chapter 1
Charlie sat in the back of the classroom hardly paying attention to the teacher. All she wanted was for the bell to ring it would then be christmas break they would have atleast 3 weeks off this time. It was about a quater till 3:00. She sat dreaming about Luke who was on the football team and her major crush.
"Yo, Sis... you better pay attention..." Said Codi as she pointed to the board with her pencil. "I will not help you with your test nor will i let you cheat." Codi faced herself back toward the board. All Charlie could do or wanted to do was get out of school. Finally the bell rang and everyone ran out the door including Charlie and Codi. As Charlie got onto the bus to go home she went to the very back as she always did. She watched out the window waiting for Luke to come on. She watched her sister yammer on about what she was doing over christmas break. She then felt someone flop down beside her.
It was Luke.....

Chapter 2
Charlie looked over at the guy she had a crush for years. She was stunned he had sat next to her as he has never sat with her before. "Hey Charlie, Cat got your tongue?" Luke said as he smiled at her. She smiled back and blushed a slight it not knowing exactly what to say. "Say, Me and Sam are having a party tonite.. Maybe you and your sister should come over. It will only be us four." Charlie looked out the window at her sister who was now walking onto the bus. "Sure, I guess if its alright with my parents." She got off the bus with her sister at her stop and looked back at the last seat to see Luke staring back at her. "So, Codi What you say we go over to Luke's for a party?" Said Charlie. "Well Ok I guess." Said Codie. Charlie then ran upstairs and laid on her bed dreaming of what she wanted to do tonite, trying to figure out why in the world Luke would ask her to go to his house. Finally it reached 5:00. Charlie and Codi headed down to Lukes house and knocked on the door waiting for an answer.

Chapter 3
After about 5 minutes of waiting Luke came and answered the door. "Hey girls. Welcome." Luke said as he took the girls coats and laid them neatly on teh hooks. "We are just up in my room playing a game." Luke took the girls up to his room. "So girls would yall like to play truth or dare?" Said Sam as the 3 walked in. The girls sat down opposite each other. "Sure..." Said Codi. "I guess." Said Charlie. "There is only 1 rule. If you do not want to answer for truth or do the dare you must take a punishment that the other 3 decide on." Said Sam. They all agreed. "Then the game begins" Said Luke. Charlie spoke up softly. "Who goes first?" Codi raised her hand as if she was eager to answer a question. "Meeeee!" They laughed at her. "Ok it will be you, Sam, Charlie, then me." Said Luke. "Ok Truth or dare sam?" Codi said with a smile. "I pick truth." Sam replied. "How far have you gone with a girl??" Sam replied. "Only kissing." Codi looked over at look Luke. "My turn." Said Sam. "So Charlie truth or dare?" Charlies eyes widened a bit as she was not expecting to be asked nor invited. "Truth." She replied in a soft voice. "Hmmm, Who do you have a crush on at school?" Charlie looked up at him a bit frightened at the question. She studdered to answer. "U...u...uhhh L...l...luke." She blushed a bit. Everyone started to laugh but Charlie and Luke. Charlie had tears in her eyes. She got up and ran out. She went down stairs and out the back door and sat in teh middle of the yard crying her eyes out. A few minutes later Luke came out and sat infront of her. "You really have a crush on me?" He said wiping her eyes free of the tears. She nodded and looked at him. Luke slowly leaned in to kiss her. Her eyes widened and she leaned back as she has never really been kissed nor had a boyfriend ever. Luke looked at her then pulled her into his chest hugging her tight letting her know he was always there for her when she needed him.

Chapter 4
Charlie slowly got up and headed for the swing set. She sat on a swing and Luke came behind her and pushed her softly. "Sorry about Sam, hes a snobby one." Luke smiled at her. "But I have to say that I like you too." He said as he stopped the swings and looked into her eyes. Charlie looked back up into his. Luke leaned in about to kiss her when she suddenly jumped at the sound of thunder clapping.They both looked up at the sky as it started to rain. Charlie got up from the swing chair and stood infront of him. She was still looking up and Luke looked down at her. She looked at him as he leaned down and kissed her. They both closed their eyes. Their clothes were soaked from the rain. They looked at each other after He pulled away. She had a slight blush on her cheeks and he giggled and kissed her cheek. They both held hands as they walked back into the house. Charlie walked into Lukes bedroom her makeup was running down her cheeks. She sat back down next to Luke. "So shall we continue?" Said Sam as he and Codi looked at Luke and Charlie.

Chapter 5
Charlie and Luke looked at them as if they really didnt want to continue but just hang out. "Well.... I dont want to really." Said Charlie. "Ok me and Sam can go down stairs and hang out and leave you two alone." Codi smiled she then got up with Sam and went down stairs then sat down on the couch and watched a movie. Charlie got up and sat on Lukes bed. Luke got up and sat next to her and held her hand. "So... I know why you dont wanna play..." She looked away embarrassed. "Maybe I just wanna watch a scary movie." She smiled at him as he got up turning his t.v. on he put 'House Of Wax' on. She had never seen this movie but heard it was scary. She sat up near the pillow as Luke sat down he put his arm over her as the movie started. As soon as a scary part came on she screamed and hid her eyes into his shirt. Luke laughed and held her tight. "Its ok, its just a movie. Nothing to be scared of." She kept her head on his chest holding the covers up to her face getting ready to cover her eyes on a scary part. Charlie started to fall asleep on him aswell as him.

The next morning Luke slowly got out of bed letting Charlie sleep a bit before waking her. A few minutes later Luke came and woke her up. "Hey sleepyhead, its time to wake up." She turned over not wanting to get up she groaned at him. "1 more hour!" She closed her eyes. Luke giggled and took the covers from her to his surprise she wasnt wearing any pants only panties and a tanktop no bra. She covered herself a bit embarrassed. "Hey! Give me the covers!!!" She snatched for them to her luck Luke pulled them away. "No need to cover up." He giggled throwing the covers to the floor he climbed onto the bed, She laid down as he crawled ontop of her. She looked into his eyes as he looked into hers. Suddenly the door opened, they both looked over to see Codi and Sam standing there their mouths dropped open.

mrjd3000
04-28-2010, 04:24 PM
Brilliant story! Loving the new chapter. More please!

Hunterman36
04-29-2010, 01:23 AM
Its doing great so far keep it up

sydneyyy93
04-29-2010, 04:17 AM
Brilliant story! Loving the new chapter. More please!

Its doing great so far keep it up

Thank you guys.... I will try to post another chapter today..

Matt Uk
04-29-2010, 01:17 PM
Brilliant :)
Please do update another one today :)

Hunterman36
05-04-2010, 11:58 PM
good story please continue

stats2001
05-05-2010, 05:14 AM
Loving the story so far...


cant wait for the next chapter!!!



:):):):)

sydneyyy93
05-07-2010, 04:27 PM
Chapter 2
Charlie looked over at the guy she had a crush for years. She was stunned he had sat next to her as he has never sat with her before. "Hey Charlie, Cat got your tongue?" Luke said as he smiled at her. She smiled back and blushed a slight it not knowing exactly what to say. "Say, Me and Sam are having a party tonite.. Maybe you and your sister should come over. It will only be us four." Charlie looked out the window at her sister who was now walking onto the bus. "Sure, I guess if its alright with my parents." She got off the bus with her sister at her stop and looked back at the last seat to see Luke staring back at her. "So, Codi What you say we go over to Luke's for a party?" Said Charlie. "Well Ok I guess." Said Codie. Charlie then ran upstairs and laid on her bed dreaming of what she wanted to do tonite, trying to figure out why in the world Luke would ask her to go to his house. Finally it reached 5:00. Charlie and Codi headed down to Lukes house and knocked on the door waiting for an answer.

Chapter 3
After about 5 minutes of waiting Luke came and answered the door. "Hey girls. Welcome." Luke said as he took the girls coats and laid them neatly on teh hooks. "We are just up in my room playing a game." Luke took the girls up to his room. "So girls would yall like to play truth or dare?" Said Sam as the 3 walked in. The girls sat down opposite each other. "Sure..." Said Codi. "I guess." Said Charlie. "There is only 1 rule. If you do not want to answer for truth or do the dare you must take a punishment that the other 3 decide on." Said Sam. They all agreed. "Then the game begins" Said Luke. Charlie spoke up softly. "Who goes first?" Codi raised her hand as if she was eager to answer a question. "Meeeee!" They laughed at her. "Ok it will be you, Sam, Charlie, then me." Said Luke. "Ok Truth or dare sam?" Codi said with a smile. "I pick truth." Sam replied. "How far have you gone with a girl??" Sam replied. "Only kissing." Codi looked over at look Luke. "My turn." Said Sam. "So Charlie truth or dare?" Charlies eyes widened a bit as she was not expecting to be asked nor invited. "Truth." She replied in a soft voice. "Hmmm, Who do you have a crush on at school?" Charlie looked up at him a bit frightened at the question. She studdered to answer. "U...u...uhhh L...l...luke." She blushed a bit. Everyone started to laugh but Charlie and Luke. Charlie had tears in her eyes. She got up and ran out. She went down stairs and out the back door and sat in teh middle of the yard crying her eyes out. A few minutes later Luke came out and sat infront of her. "You really have a crush on me?" He said wiping her eyes free of the tears. She nodded and looked at him. Luke slowly leaned in to kiss her. Her eyes widened and she leaned back as she has never really been kissed nor had a boyfriend ever. Luke looked at her then pulled her into his chest hugging her tight letting her know he was always there for her when she needed him.

Chapter 4
Charlie slowly got up and headed for the swing set. She sat on a swing and Luke came behind her and pushed her softly. "Sorry about Sam, hes a snobby one." Luke smiled at her. "But I have to say that I like you too." He said as he stopped the swings and looked into her eyes. Charlie looked back up into his. Luke leaned in about to kiss her when she suddenly jumped at the sound of thunder clapping.They both looked up at the sky as it started to rain. Charlie got up from the swing chair and stood infront of him. She was still looking up and Luke looked down at her. She looked at him as he leaned down and kissed her. They both closed their eyes. Their clothes were soaked from the rain. They looked at each other after He pulled away. She had a slight blush on her cheeks and he giggled and kissed her cheek. They both held hands as they walked back into the house. Charlie walked into Lukes bedroom her makeup was running down her cheeks. She sat back down next to Luke. "So shall we continue?" Said Sam as he and Codi looked at Luke and Charlie.

Chapter 5
Charlie and Luke looked at them as if they really didnt want to continue but just hang out. "Well.... I dont want to really." Said Charlie. "Ok me and Sam can go down stairs and hang out and leave you two alone." Codi smiled she then got up with Sam and went down stairs then sat down on the couch and watched a movie. Charlie got up and sat on Lukes bed. Luke got up and sat next to her and held her hand. "So... I know why you dont wanna play..." She looked away embarrassed. "Maybe I just wanna watch a scary movie." She smiled at him as he got up turning his t.v. on he put 'House Of Wax' on. She had never seen this movie but heard it was scary. She sat up near the pillow as Luke sat down he put his arm over her as the movie started. As soon as a scary part came on she screamed and hid her eyes into his shirt. Luke laughed and held her tight. "Its ok, its just a movie. Nothing to be scared of." She kept her head on his chest holding the covers up to her face getting ready to cover her eyes on a scary part. Charlie started to fall asleep on him aswell as him.

The next morning Luke slowly got out of bed letting Charlie sleep a bit before waking her. A few minutes later Luke came and woke her up. "Hey sleepyhead, its time to wake up." She turned over not wanting to get up she groaned at him. "1 more hour!" She closed her eyes. Luke giggled and took the covers from her to his surprise she wasnt wearing any pants only panties and a tanktop no bra. She covered herself a bit embarrassed. "Hey! Give me the covers!!!" She snatched for them to her luck Luke pulled them away. "No need to cover up." He giggled throwing the covers to the floor he climbed onto the bed, She laid down as he crawled ontop of her. She looked into his eyes as he looked into hers. Suddenly the door opened, they both looked over to see Codi and Sam standing there their mouths dropped open.

Chapter 6
They both jumped up as soon as they seen Codi and Sam they rushed to put there clothes on blushing a bit as Codi and Sam walked off giggling. Charlie sat on the bed as she packed her things up getting ready to go back home. Luke sat next to her and kissed her on the side of the head. "Hey, I had fun with you while you were here." She smiled looking up at him. "Really? I did to." He grabbed her bag and walked down to the door with her. He hugged her and kissed her goodbye. Her and Codi walked back to their house talking the whole way back. "So what did you do with Luke Charlie?" Charlie blushed a bit. "Nothing just watch movies and fell asleep in his bed with him." As they kept talking it must have been hours of walking as soon as they got home Charlie ran up to her room and closed and locked her door. She sat on her bed thinking about everything that had happened today and the nite before.

The next day at school Charlie held her books close to her chest. Soon she felt someone behind her hold their hands over her eyes. She turned around to find Luke standing there smiling at her. She smiled back and hugged him. "Morning. How'd you sleep last nite?" She said as she looked up at him. Returning the hug "Fairly well." He took her books and walked with her to her first class. As the bell rung to go to class he kissed her and handed her books to her. He hugged her at the same time slipping a note into her jacket pocket. As she sat down taking her pen out of her jacket pocket she found the note and opened it and started to read what it said.

sydneyyy93
05-09-2010, 10:03 AM
Someone comment and ill update

dare_devil_girl
05-09-2010, 10:25 AM
I like the story so far ..

mrjd3000
05-09-2010, 10:51 AM
More please more!!!!!!

sydneyyy93
05-09-2010, 01:54 PM
Chapter 6
They both jumped up as soon as they seen Codi and Sam they rushed to put there clothes on blushing a bit as Codi and Sam walked off giggling. Charlie sat on the bed as she packed her things up getting ready to go back home. Luke sat next to her and kissed her on the side of the head. "Hey, I had fun with you while you were here." She smiled looking up at him. "Really? I did to." He grabbed her bag and walked down to the door with her. He hugged her and kissed her goodbye. Her and Codi walked back to their house talking the whole way back. "So what did you do with Luke Charlie?" Charlie blushed a bit. "Nothing just watch movies and fell asleep in his bed with him." As they kept talking it must have been hours of walking as soon as they got home Charlie ran up to her room and closed and locked her door. She sat on her bed thinking about everything that had happened today and the nite before.

The next day at school Charlie held her books close to her chest. Soon she felt someone behind her hold their hands over her eyes. She turned around to find Luke standing there smiling at her. She smiled back and hugged him. "Morning. How'd you sleep last nite?" She said as she looked up at him. Returning the hug "Fairly well." He took her books and walked with her to her first class. As the bell rung to go to class he kissed her and handed her books to her. He hugged her at the same time slipping a note into her jacket pocket. As she sat down taking her pen out of her jacket pocket she found the note and opened it and started to read what it said.

Chapter 7
After she opened the note she slowly read it. 'Hey Char, Meet me behind the gym today after school. The old gym in the far back behind the school. ♥ Luke'. After she read it she smiled up at the sky thinking about what he wanted and why behind the gym. The old gym was abandoned years ago before she even started school. Rumors said that there is a little girl who was raped and murdered in there and she haunts it. Charlie never step foot near it but she knew that Luke would most likely keep her safe. At about 2:15 the bell rang and school was over. She stood just a few feet from the gym she was so scared to go up to it. She held the note that Luke wrote her close to her as she slowly walked up shaking a bit. She went behind the gym and seen Luke waiting for her. "Luke can we go this place gives me the creeps." She said to him in a scared tone. He smiled at her and hugged her. "Its ok." She looked up at him. "No i wanna go its scary he..." She was inturupted by him kissing her. "Like I said before its ok youll be fine." He said holding her tightly to him. She smiled lightly feeling a bit better at knowing how much he cared about her. She looked at him. "So, why'd you want me to meet you back here?" He smiled as he went behind her and placed a necklace on her neck. "Will you be mine?" He said kissing her cheek. She blushed a bit and felt the necklace it was shapped in a heart with her and his initials in it. She looked at him....

Matt Uk
05-10-2010, 04:25 AM
Im loving it :D
Please keep it up
I want this story to never end :) ;)

walapalooo
05-10-2010, 06:17 AM
very good story. i think she has great potential.

eire
05-10-2010, 12:15 PM
I'm new here and this was the first story I read and omg its brilliant:) well done and please keep going:)

Star Shadows
05-10-2010, 12:45 PM
This is brilliant so far :D I am so glad i re-found it youre doing an excelent job of it. Though maybe keep an eye on tenses in places, not like I am one to talk on that mind. Keep it up.

I am actually enjoying the short posts too which suprises me.
in the words of mcDonalds "I'm lovin' it"

xx Shadow

sydneyyy93
05-10-2010, 01:16 PM
This is my first story so please tell me how i am doing.

Chapter 1
Charlie sat in the back of the classroom hardly paying attention to the teacher. All she wanted was for the bell to ring it would then be christmas break they would have atleast 3 weeks off this time. It was about a quater till 3:00. She sat dreaming about Luke who was on the football team and her major crush.
"Yo, Sis... you better pay attention..." Said Codi as she pointed to the board with her pencil. "I will not help you with your test nor will i let you cheat." Codi faced herself back toward the board. All Charlie could do or wanted to do was get out of school. Finally the bell rang and everyone ran out the door including Charlie and Codi. As Charlie got onto the bus to go home she went to the very back as she always did. She watched out the window waiting for Luke to come on. She watched her sister yammer on about what she was doing over christmas break. She then felt someone flop down beside her.
It was Luke.....

Chapter 2
Charlie looked over at the guy she had a crush for years. She was stunned he had sat next to her as he has never sat with her before. "Hey Charlie, Cat got your tongue?" Luke said as he smiled at her. She smiled back and blushed a slight it not knowing exactly what to say. "Say, Me and Sam are having a party tonite.. Maybe you and your sister should come over. It will only be us four." Charlie looked out the window at her sister who was now walking onto the bus. "Sure, I guess if its alright with my parents." She got off the bus with her sister at her stop and looked back at the last seat to see Luke staring back at her. "So, Codi What you say we go over to Luke's for a party?" Said Charlie. "Well Ok I guess." Said Codie. Charlie then ran upstairs and laid on her bed dreaming of what she wanted to do tonite, trying to figure out why in the world Luke would ask her to go to his house. Finally it reached 5:00. Charlie and Codi headed down to Lukes house and knocked on the door waiting for an answer.

Chapter 3
After about 5 minutes of waiting Luke came and answered the door. "Hey girls. Welcome." Luke said as he took the girls coats and laid them neatly on teh hooks. "We are just up in my room playing a game." Luke took the girls up to his room. "So girls would yall like to play truth or dare?" Said Sam as the 3 walked in. The girls sat down opposite each other. "Sure..." Said Codi. "I guess." Said Charlie. "There is only 1 rule. If you do not want to answer for truth or do the dare you must take a punishment that the other 3 decide on." Said Sam. They all agreed. "Then the game begins" Said Luke. Charlie spoke up softly. "Who goes first?" Codi raised her hand as if she was eager to answer a question. "Meeeee!" They laughed at her. "Ok it will be you, Sam, Charlie, then me." Said Luke. "Ok Truth or dare sam?" Codi said with a smile. "I pick truth." Sam replied. "How far have you gone with a girl??" Sam replied. "Only kissing." Codi looked over at look Luke. "My turn." Said Sam. "So Charlie truth or dare?" Charlies eyes widened a bit as she was not expecting to be asked nor invited. "Truth." She replied in a soft voice. "Hmmm, Who do you have a crush on at school?" Charlie looked up at him a bit frightened at the question. She studdered to answer. "U...u...uhhh L...l...luke." She blushed a bit. Everyone started to laugh but Charlie and Luke. Charlie had tears in her eyes. She got up and ran out. She went down stairs and out the back door and sat in teh middle of the yard crying her eyes out. A few minutes later Luke came out and sat infront of her. "You really have a crush on me?" He said wiping her eyes free of the tears. She nodded and looked at him. Luke slowly leaned in to kiss her. Her eyes widened and she leaned back as she has never really been kissed nor had a boyfriend ever. Luke looked at her then pulled her into his chest hugging her tight letting her know he was always there for her when she needed him.

Chapter 4
Charlie slowly got up and headed for the swing set. She sat on a swing and Luke came behind her and pushed her softly. "Sorry about Sam, hes a snobby one." Luke smiled at her. "But I have to say that I like you too." He said as he stopped the swings and looked into her eyes. Charlie looked back up into his. Luke leaned in about to kiss her when she suddenly jumped at the sound of thunder clapping.They both looked up at the sky as it started to rain. Charlie got up from the swing chair and stood infront of him. She was still looking up and Luke looked down at her. She looked at him as he leaned down and kissed her. They both closed their eyes. Their clothes were soaked from the rain. They looked at each other after He pulled away. She had a slight blush on her cheeks and he giggled and kissed her cheek. They both held hands as they walked back into the house. Charlie walked into Lukes bedroom her makeup was running down her cheeks. She sat back down next to Luke. "So shall we continue?" Said Sam as he and Codi looked at Luke and Charlie.

Chapter 5
Charlie and Luke looked at them as if they really didnt want to continue but just hang out. "Well.... I dont want to really." Said Charlie. "Ok me and Sam can go down stairs and hang out and leave you two alone." Codi smiled she then got up with Sam and went down stairs then sat down on the couch and watched a movie. Charlie got up and sat on Lukes bed. Luke got up and sat next to her and held her hand. "So... I know why you dont wanna play..." She looked away embarrassed. "Maybe I just wanna watch a scary movie." She smiled at him as he got up turning his t.v. on he put 'House Of Wax' on. She had never seen this movie but heard it was scary. She sat up near the pillow as Luke sat down he put his arm over her as the movie started. As soon as a scary part came on she screamed and hid her eyes into his shirt. Luke laughed and held her tight. "Its ok, its just a movie. Nothing to be scared of." She kept her head on his chest holding the covers up to her face getting ready to cover her eyes on a scary part. Charlie started to fall asleep on him aswell as him.

The next morning Luke slowly got out of bed letting Charlie sleep a bit before waking her. A few minutes later Luke came and woke her up. "Hey sleepyhead, its time to wake up." She turned over not wanting to get up she groaned at him. "1 more hour!" She closed her eyes. Luke giggled and took the covers from her to his surprise she wasnt wearing any pants only panties and a tanktop no bra. She covered herself a bit embarrassed. "Hey! Give me the covers!!!" She snatched for them to her luck Luke pulled them away. "No need to cover up." He giggled throwing the covers to the floor he climbed onto the bed, She laid down as he crawled ontop of her. She looked into his eyes as he looked into hers. Suddenly the door opened, they both looked over to see Codi and Sam standing there their mouths dropped open.

Chapter 6
They both jumped up as soon as they seen Codi and Sam they rushed to put there clothes on blushing a bit as Codi and Sam walked off giggling. Charlie sat on the bed as she packed her things up getting ready to go back home. Luke sat next to her and kissed her on the side of the head. "Hey, I had fun with you while you were here." She smiled looking up at him. "Really? I did to." He grabbed her bag and walked down to the door with her. He hugged her and kissed her goodbye. Her and Codi walked back to their house talking the whole way back. "So what did you do with Luke Charlie?" Charlie blushed a bit. "Nothing just watch movies and fell asleep in his bed with him." As they kept talking it must have been hours of walking as soon as they got home Charlie ran up to her room and closed and locked her door. She sat on her bed thinking about everything that had happened today and the nite before.

The next day at school Charlie held her books close to her chest. Soon she felt someone behind her hold their hands over her eyes. She turned around to find Luke standing there smiling at her. She smiled back and hugged him. "Morning. How'd you sleep last nite?" She said as she looked up at him. Returning the hug "Fairly well." He took her books and walked with her to her first class. As the bell rung to go to class he kissed her and handed her books to her. He hugged her at the same time slipping a note into her jacket pocket. As she sat down taking her pen out of her jacket pocket she found the note and opened it and started to read what it said.

Chapter 7
After she opened the note she slowly read it. 'Hey Char, Meet me behind the gym today after school. The old gym in the far back behind the school. ♥ Luke'. After she read it she smiled up at the sky thinking about what he wanted and why behind the gym. The old gym was abandoned years ago before she even started school. Rumors said that there is a little girl who was raped and murdered in there and she haunts it. Charlie never step foot near it but she knew that Luke would most likely keep her safe. At about 2:15 the bell rang and school was over. She stood just a few feet from the gym she was so scared to go up to it. She held the note that Luke wrote her close to her as she slowly walked up shaking a bit. She went behind the gym and seen Luke waiting for her. "Luke can we go this place gives me the creeps." She said to him in a scared tone. He smiled at her and hugged her. "Its ok." She looked up at him. "No i wanna go its scary he..." She was inturupted by him kissing her. "Like I said before its ok youll be fine." He said holding her tightly to him. She smiled lightly feeling a bit better at knowing how much he cared about her. She looked at him. "So, why'd you want me to meet you back here?" He smiled as he went behind her and placed a necklace on her neck. "Will you be mine?" He said kissing her cheek. She blushed a bit and felt the necklace it was shapped in a heart with her and his initials in it. She looked at him....
Chapter 8
"It.....It's beautiful." She smiled hugging him. "You like it Char?" He said as he kissed her neck. "Yes I do and Yes I will be yours." She smiled and giggled abit as he kissed her neck. "Luke that tickles....." He giggled and nibbled on her neck. "I know." She smiled and looked into his eyes. "Luke did you know this whole time before you invited me and Codi to your party that i had a crush on you?" She asked. "Well I have noticed you staring at me a couple times in the hallway and at assemblies." He hugged her tight. "But thats ok I have always liked you aswell." She closed her eyes as she laid her head on his chest. "Why didnt you tell me Luke?".....

(Sorry Its short I have a big headache.)

Matt Uk
05-10-2010, 01:23 PM
Better and better with every post :D
I love the romance of it it's sweet, cute and gives it a happy, positive vibe :D

Get better soon :)

Star Shadows
05-10-2010, 01:44 PM
Better and better with every post :D
I love the romance of it it's sweet, cute and gives it a happy, positive vibe :D

Get better soon :)

I do second this opinion

Mackay-
05-10-2010, 02:54 PM
First comment on the forums for me and this story is worth the comment, Love it !!:)

hookedondares
05-10-2010, 03:44 PM
i love it :D best bit is that its not just another story it has romance instead. though, not wanting to be negative:p, i think you should stop quoting everything you have already posted and spell and tense check. other than that good job :D

sydneyyy93
05-10-2010, 04:04 PM
i love it :D best bit is that its not just another story it has romance instead. though, not wanting to be negative:p, i think you should stop quoting everything you have already posted and spell and tense check. other than that good job :D

I quote it for people who havent read it so they dont have to read and read and read just to get to the next post

Matt Uk
05-10-2010, 04:24 PM
I quote it for people who havent read it so they dont have to read and read and read just to get to the next post

That's actually a good idea :)
cos then when you read it and it's like 25 pages (hopefully ;) ), you dont have to go from 1 and work your way forward

sydneyyy93
05-10-2010, 07:42 PM
Chapter 9
He held her hand and started to walk away from the gym on the sidewalk. "Well I wasnt sure on how you liked me as a friend or more... But when you said it at the party it surprised me.... I didnt mean for Sam to hurt you hes a snob though."He said as he wrapped her arm around her shoulder. "Its ok... I just get emotional sometimes..." She sat on a swing as they entered the park. "No need to cry though... I know you havent had a boyfriend and thats ok..." He pushed her on the swing. "Well I am glad you found out about me liking you." She looked at him as she came back to him. He stopped her with his arm around her stomach. He kissed her deeply. "You wanna go to my place it will just be us and it is friday....." She smiled. "Well I guess I have no plans for the weekend...." She got off the swing and held his hand as they both walked to his place. As soon as they got there he unlocked the door and went inside with her. "My parents wont be home all weekend as its there anniversary and want to get away." "what do you want to do then?" She said turning to him. "Well...."

Matt Uk
05-11-2010, 07:06 AM
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH ;)
I wonder what they'll do :p

Brilliant still :D
please do keep it up for like.. ermm..... EVER :D hehe

Star Shadows
05-11-2010, 09:27 AM
this story is brill, so much better than many of the stories on here, its good you take time to develop what is going on.

sydneyyy93
05-11-2010, 01:24 PM
Chapter 9
He held her hand and started to walk away from the gym on the sidewalk. "Well I wasnt sure on how you liked me as a friend or more... But when you said it at the party it surprised me.... I didnt mean for Sam to hurt you hes a snob though."He said as he wrapped her arm around her shoulder. "Its ok... I just get emotional sometimes..." She sat on a swing as they entered the park. "No need to cry though... I know you havent had a boyfriend and thats ok..." He pushed her on the swing. "Well I am glad you found out about me liking you." She looked at him as she came back to him. He stopped her with his arm around her stomach. He kissed her deeply. "You wanna go to my place it will just be us and it is friday....." She smiled. "Well I guess I have no plans for the weekend...." She got off the swing and held his hand as they both walked to his place. As soon as they got there he unlocked the door and went inside with her. "My parents wont be home all weekend as its there anniversary and want to get away." "what do you want to do then?" She said turning to him. "Well...."

Chapter 10

Charlie looked at him a bit confused. "Well what?" Luke wrapped his arms around her pulling her into him. "Well.. I dunno what do you want to do your the guest." She felt a bulge in his pants. She stepped back and ran for the door. He stopped her by grabbing her by her wrist. He pulled her to him. "Why you leaving?" "Because your dick is hard and I know what your gonna try to do......." She pulled away from him and stood facing away from him. "You think I'm gonna force you into sex????" He stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her hugging her. "I wouldnt do that.... I love you Char." She looked at him. "I sure hope not I'm only sixteen I dont wanna risk getting pregnant..." She turned around and hugged him tightly. "Do you mind if I spend the nite?" She pulled her cell phone out. "No not at all.." She dialed her moms number. "Hey mom do you mind if I spend the weekend at a friends? Ill be home sunday...." She hung the cell phone up and placed it in her bag. "She said I could.... So what do you wanna do tonite through Sunday?" He smiled at her and sat on the couch patting the side next to him as he grabbed the remote and turned on 'Saw' She sat next to him. "Luke this movie terrifies me....." She grabbed the blanket next to her and held it up close to her eyes to hide when a scary part came up. Luke wrapped his arm around her and laughed. "Char.... Its just a movie nothing to be scared of."[/FONT]

chubbsman7
05-11-2010, 06:37 PM
I'm going to have to congratulate you on creating not only an interesting piece of literature, but something which is always about sex.

Amazing. Keep it up.

I'm a grammar freak (of course), so of course I could criticize you on improper grammar, but I'm not going to do that!

Great story! Keep it up!

Matt Uk
05-12-2010, 03:16 AM
I'm going to have to congratulate you on creating not only an interesting piece of literature, but something which is always about sex.

Amazing. Keep it up.

I'm a grammar freak (of course), so of course I could criticize you on improper grammar, but I'm not going to do that!

Great story! Keep it up!

For somebody who is a grammar freak, you should have noticed you put
"But something which is always about sex" when you should have put "but something which ISN'T always about sex"

lol just saying :p

But yeah very good story :D
Keep it up lol

eire
05-12-2010, 03:06 PM
Love it, more please:)

Devilstar
05-12-2010, 07:38 PM
Lol I agree this story is amazing because it's not just sex and blackmail... I know people have already said that, but Its an awesome story:D:D

seth18
05-12-2010, 08:48 PM
As stated above, there are quite a few grammar errors, which are kinda bugging me, but the story is worth it. ;)

However, I am a little confused here... In the first chapter its the Friday, before a three week vaction, but after Saturday, it skips and on 'Monday' they're back in school, but after a few more chapters, its Friday, when no actually days have passed.

Also, I do like the quoting posts, I have actually done this with my first story, except it failed- I'm guessing that's because I wasn't smart enough to quote it. Also, I have a suggesstion. If you do keep making it chapters 1-'X' by quotes, maybe after a while, put the next installment on top for your 'fans'?

Seth18

sydneyyy93
05-13-2010, 12:42 PM
As stated above, there are quite a few grammar errors, which are kinda bugging me, but the story is worth it. ;)

However, I am a little confused here... In the first chapter its the Friday, before a three week vaction, but after Saturday, it skips and on 'Monday' they're back in school, but after a few more chapters, its Friday, when no actually days have passed.

Also, I do like the quoting posts, I have actually done this with my first story, except it failed- I'm guessing that's because I wasn't smart enough to quote it. Also, I have a suggesstion. If you do keep making it chapters 1-'X' by quotes, maybe after a while, put the next installment on top for your 'fans'?

Seth18

I noticed that.... and i am sorry. sometime I dont realize because I type fast and I type 'Night.' like 'Nite.' because its easier.

sydneyyy93
05-16-2010, 11:25 AM
Chapter 10

Charlie looked at him a bit confused. "Well what?" Luke wrapped his arms around her pulling her into him. "Well.. I dunno what do you want to do your the guest." She felt a bulge in his pants. She stepped back and ran for the door. He stopped her by grabbing her by her wrist. He pulled her to him. "Why you leaving?" "Because your dick is hard and I know what your gonna try to do......." She pulled away from him and stood facing away from him. "You think I'm gonna force you into sex????" He stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her hugging her. "I wouldnt do that.... I love you Char." She looked at him. "I sure hope not I'm only sixteen I dont wanna risk getting pregnant..." She turned around and hugged him tightly. "Do you mind if I spend the nite?" She pulled her cell phone out. "No not at all.." She dialed her moms number. "Hey mom do you mind if I spend the weekend at a friends? Ill be home sunday...." She hung the cell phone up and placed it in her bag. "She said I could.... So what do you wanna do tonite through Sunday?" He smiled at her and sat on the couch patting the side next to him as he grabbed the remote and turned on 'Saw' She sat next to him. "Luke this movie terrifies me....." She grabbed the blanket next to her and held it up close to her eyes to hide when a scary part came up. Luke wrapped his arm around her and laughed. "Char.... Its just a movie nothing to be scared of."[/FONT]

Chapter 11
She looked at him. "Oh yea just a movie??? Its a scary movie with blood and evil things in it!" She leaned on him. He wrapped his arm around her letting her know she was ok. "Luke..." She smiled. "I love you!" He looked at her and kissed her on the head not responding. It was close to the end if the movie . Charlie was already asleep and laying on him. Luke looked at her and smiled. "Shes so adorable...." Luke got up and laid her down and covered her up. She woke up about an hour later. She walked up the stairs to Lukes room. She scooted him over and laid next to him. The next morning Luke woke up and found Charlie laying next to him. Charlie looked at him. "Hey Beautiful." Said Luke as he kissed her cheek. "Howd you sleep?" She smiled. "Very well." Charlie got out of bed only wearing a tank top and her hipster panties. She walked out and went to the bathroom. She yawned on the way and scratched her head. She came back and put her pants on. "What do you wanna do today?"

LittleRayRay
05-16-2010, 11:41 AM
It's cool! :) I like it

doggy_slave
05-17-2010, 01:42 AM
very good stor but when s anyhing going 2 happen ... and y dont u make ur paragraphs longer ... but good job all th same

the doc
05-17-2010, 08:58 AM
haha you are really mean wiht ur need of comments lol
but u r a good writer

sydneyyy93
05-21-2010, 07:37 PM
Chapter 11
She looked at him. "Oh yea just a movie??? Its a scary movie with blood and evil things in it!" She leaned on him. He wrapped his arm around her letting her know she was ok. "Luke..." She smiled. "I love you!" He looked at her and kissed her on the head not responding. It was close to the end if the movie . Charlie was already asleep and laying on him. Luke looked at her and smiled. "Shes so adorable...." Luke got up and laid her down and covered her up. She woke up about an hour later. She walked up the stairs to Lukes room. She scooted him over and laid next to him. The next morning Luke woke up and found Charlie laying next to him. Charlie looked at him. "Hey Beautiful." Said Luke as he kissed her cheek. "Howd you sleep?" She smiled. "Very well." Charlie got out of bed only wearing a tank top and her hipster panties. She walked out and went to the bathroom. She yawned on the way and scratched her head. She came back and put her pants on. "What do you wanna do today?"

Chapter 12
Luke looked at her watching her fit her slim tight body into her pants. She grabbed one of her shirts from her bag she had and slipped it on. It fit perfectly on her skinny body. "I thought we would just stay here and maybe swim in the pool." He smiled at her. "Its freezing though Luke..." Luke looked out the window. "Its not that cold maybe like 50s or low 50s but not that cold." He put on his swimming trunks and a tanktop.. "Or would you rather go to the beach?" She thought for a minute. "Ummm How about the beach?" She smiled and grabbed her bag. "Can you stop by my place so I can get my swim suit?" She walked down the stairs and to his jeep. She placed her things in the back seat and climbed in on the passanger seat waiting for Luke. He came out about 5 minutes later shirtless. Charlie blushed a deep red. Luke had a 6 pack and was muscular. He got into the drivers side. "So your place?" He said as he pulled out of the driveway and headed down the street to Charlies house. "Yea... but park a little ways off my mom thinks im staying over at a girls house if she sees you shell rip my ear off my head." He chuckled and stopped the car. "Alright." Luke kissed Charlies cheek as she got out of the car and started to sneak around her house and up to her room. She swung her leg over the balcony and climbed over. She went to her top drawer and searched for her zebra print bikini. It was white blue and pink. She grabbed it and climbed back down off the balcony and climbed back into the car.

Hallow
05-21-2010, 08:57 PM
Great Story looking forward to more

Matt Uk
05-23-2010, 03:25 PM
I'm Back!!!! :D

And what a welcome back, a brilliant 2 chapters to my favourite gD story ;)

Please do keep up the good work :D

molten man
05-23-2010, 04:17 PM
Nice story, only if the posts could be longer and there was more happening in the story, it would be great!!

sydneyyy93
05-23-2010, 04:45 PM
I am about to stop this story...

Suzee
05-23-2010, 05:28 PM
I am about to stop this story...

Why??? i love it, i know this is my first time commenting but its really good...

sydneyyy93
05-23-2010, 05:36 PM
I might if people would stop posting comments like make longer posts its my story and ill write it how i want to...

boxerbriefs11
05-23-2010, 05:59 PM
make shorter posts......lol

Suzee
05-23-2010, 06:20 PM
write how you want, posts can be as long or as short as you want them to be, personally i love the shorter posts because it leaves you guessing more

Devilstar
05-23-2010, 08:21 PM
Noooooo!! Plees continue the story it's really good plus I like the shorter posts because you post faster! Keep writing I'm sure everyone loves the story just the way your doing it.

eire
05-26-2010, 12:32 PM
dont stop:( its brilliant and has great potential, please continue

Mr Very Daring
06-05-2010, 02:26 PM
this is one of the best stories here as it does have any clichés which are very very common to stories' here so please do not stop- it would be an injustice to the getdare world. Also it's a very simple,straight forward, pure and innocent love story which the short posts help add to this simple effect.

sydneyyy93
06-06-2010, 08:44 AM
Chapter 12
Luke looked at her watching her fit her slim tight body into her pants. She grabbed one of her shirts from her bag she had and slipped it on. It fit perfectly on her skinny body. "I thought we would just stay here and maybe swim in the pool." He smiled at her. "Its freezing though Luke..." Luke looked out the window. "Its not that cold maybe like 50s or low 50s but not that cold." He put on his swimming trunks and a tanktop.. "Or would you rather go to the beach?" She thought for a minute. "Ummm How about the beach?" She smiled and grabbed her bag. "Can you stop by my place so I can get my swim suit?" She walked down the stairs and to his jeep. She placed her things in the back seat and climbed in on the passanger seat waiting for Luke. He came out about 5 minutes later shirtless. Charlie blushed a deep red. Luke had a 6 pack and was muscular. He got into the drivers side. "So your place?" He said as he pulled out of the driveway and headed down the street to Charlies house. "Yea... but park a little ways off my mom thinks im staying over at a girls house if she sees you shell rip my ear off my head." He chuckled and stopped the car. "Alright." Luke kissed Charlies cheek as she got out of the car and started to sneak around her house and up to her room. She swung her leg over the balcony and climbed over. She went to her top drawer and searched for her zebra print bikini. It was white blue and pink. She grabbed it and climbed back down off the balcony and climbed back into the car.

Chapter 13
Luke greeted her with a smile as she climbed into the jeep. She pulled her bikini out of her bag and laid in on her lap as if she was going to put it on right then. Luke began to drive to teh beach stopping at a restaurant to eat first. Before arriving at the restaurant Charlie put on her bikini leaving the top without a short and the bottoms with short shorts over them. She got out of the car and walked with Luke grabbing his hand as they walked in to taco bell. It was Charlies favorite place to eat. Charlie stood in line holding Charlies hand looking at the menu. "Say I gotta go to the little girls room can you order me a chicken Quesadilla?" She smiled as she hurried off to the restroom. She came back about 2 minutes later and sat down at a table. She smiled at him as he came with the food. Luke sat teh tray down and sat infront of her. Charlie grabbed her food and began to eat as she was starving. Luke giggled as he began to eat his taco. Charlie was done about 10 minutes later and sat waiting for luke to finish his second taco. She sipped on her drink and then threw it out. "So was it good?" She smiled a bit then stood up stretching. Luke put the tray up and walked with Charlie to the car. They both got in and headed to the beach. Once they got there Luke helped bring the blankets to the spot they chose. Charlie sat the blanket out on the sand and sat down next to Luke.

The Judge
06-07-2010, 06:19 PM
this case seems a lot differnt from the others and it has proven to be a great case. i would suggest that you use "the" instead of "teh" before the dare grammarians grade you on it.

LAXmodel123
06-07-2010, 09:53 PM
Dont stop i love this story!!

Archon
06-08-2010, 02:41 AM
Good Story I like it