PDA

View Full Version : Fiction: Just for fun


dman4life
07-10-2009, 04:43 PM
First story: Please give feedback
-------------------------------

Just For Fun: CHAPTER ONE
--------------------------

So here I am at home alone again tonight. My names Dan. I'm 26, and an average guy. Job, lots of friends, and a pretty good guy to hang out with. I don't get into much trouble, and don't hang with the wrong crowd. Problem is, I'm getting bored of this life. I need a change.

I take a hot shower, it's 7:30pm right now, still light out. I'm still stressing about my day. Typical job, typical stress, and typical thoughts about changing my attitude towards everything. Tonight is the night. I always say this, but not this time, I need to ACT on my thoughts. YES! Tonight, I can do this.

I turn the shower off and grab the towel. Drying off my body I notice I'm a bit hard. I haven't had sex with anyone in months, and I haven't masturbated in weeks due to this mood I'm in. Tonight is gonna be the night.

Walking to the mirror I take a look at myself. Typical male I think. I look at my hair and notice how plain it is. A change... I pick up the hair clippers and on the lowest blade I send my hair into the drain with each pass. There we go, much better. Not bald, but just short enough to look a bit tougher.

I walk naked down the hall to my room and grab some jeans, a tee shirt, socks, and a pair of boxers. Racing thoughts are still going through my head, my now shaved short head.

The phone rings
"BRRRIIINNGGGG"

"Hello?"

"What up kid!? You wanna hang out tonight? I got you tonight if you wanna have some drinks... I know this place that is hopping with women tonight, so you down?"

It was John, my best friend since school. He's been trying to get me hooked up for over 2 months now, knowing about my dry spell.

I speak into the phone "Yeah, alright, let's go... pick me up in 15 minutes."

I hang up the phone, tossing the receiver on the bed. I look down at my body, still unclothed and freshly showered and semi hard, I consider tugging one out before heading out. Not yet, it can wait. I toss the clothes on, and toss on some cologne.

I step outside on my porch and after fishing for the pack in my pocket, I slap a cig out of my menthol pack and light it up. Inhaling slowly, enjoying it as I contemplate my actions tonight, I exhale slowly and put a grin on my face as John pulls up.


----------------------

I'm not sure of all the rules on this site, what's the rules with violent stories? Nothing over the top like snuff stuff, but what about some violent actions and language?

interesting
07-10-2009, 05:10 PM
Since you're posting this in the 'mature stories', it should be fine, whatever you put in.

You can, however, see the rules in the sticky at the top of the section.

Komodo Jones
07-10-2009, 06:15 PM
Um...I don't really know what to say about this story. It seems very rushed, there's enough detail to actually know what's going on but other than that it doesn't seem to be going anywhere. I'm sorry to be a tough critic but the story is going too fast and it seems like the main plot point right now is a guy wants to have sex. I don't see any real hook here to keep me wanting to see what happens next. But on the other hand, I don't know if there are going to be any twists or turns in the following chapters. Advice I have for you right now is don't go too fast into it, slow down a little and add some details into it.