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slave_boi
09-17-2008, 02:56 PM
this is my first time writting a story so let me know what you all think


PART 1
I was there in my science classroom sitting in my back corner with my best friend, nicole. It was like any other science class. We were doing a lab with some chemicals. As usual we weren't paying any attention. We just put random stuff in the beaker. I put some green liquid and mixed it with the blue powder because i thought it would look pretty cool. It did, untill it started to foam up and splash all over me.
My teacher (who is female, blonde and about 28 with some really nice boobs) told everyone to get out of the classroom while I take an emergency shower. I was scared that i would die, so i stripped down bare naked and then all of a sudden my teacher pulls out her cell phone and starts taking pictures of me. She said after i was to take the shower to go to the girls bathroom to meet her.

When i finsihed taking the shower i decided to listen to her and go to the girls restroom. Now first let me point out that i am a guy so if someone see's me going there i'm going to be screwed. So I look around to see if anyone is watching me and i dont see anyone. I enter the bathroom only to see my teeacher, Ms. D. She pulls out her phone and tells me that i will be her slave for the rest of the month (it was only nov 8). I asked her what would happen if i dont and she showed me by sending a picture of me naked to her best girl friend. In the picture it said to come here and see him. So after what seemed like 30 min, she comes in. She tells me her name is Pamela. She is about my age (15 or so) blonde hair and has c cups.

what do u think so far?
this is just the intro so now i will start the main body with all the action
and if u have any suggestions then just message me

tilly07
09-17-2008, 03:46 PM
Good good. keep going.

anonimousbob
09-19-2008, 01:46 AM
It's a nice start and has a lot of potential

Curly_Kleg
09-21-2008, 01:27 PM
Great potential in this one, carry on.

slave_boi
09-21-2008, 06:56 PM
sorry for the delay people but do to the hurricane ike my internet hasnt been working :(
i will surely write 2morro

slave_boi
09-22-2008, 01:27 PM
PART 2
After the brief introductions we hear the bell ring which lets us know school is out for the day. So i start to walk out the bathroom and they stop me and tell me to meet up at her house in an hour. One hour in my world is not a lot of time. So I start running home which is 4 blocks away and usually takes 30 min to get to. I reach my house in 15 min and, since i'll be staying the next month with my teacher, start packing random clothes. I look at my clock and realize that i have only 10 min. to get to my teachers house. I quickly hop in the shower then go on my way. When i knocked on the door my teacher answered in her see through night gown. IT was like she wasn't wearing anything. Then i walk into see pam (the girl i meet in the bathroom) naked! I thought this was going to be a good night. right when i saw pam i got an instant boner. Mr teacher then told me this is where i will be sleeping. It was a pile of newspaper next to her big ass bed. I told her that i will never sleep on newspaper. Then then took out a whip and whipped me untill i agreed to sleep there. I then went to sleep only to wake up 2 hours later. She told me i was to make her breakfast. I thought that'd be easy enough, but when i got to her pantry there was nothing. I decided i would make her toast and jam. She ate that and then told me to strip to nothing. Now being naked with your teacher is awkward so i said no.
got to go but will put more up 2night

SpikyToad
10-02-2008, 08:42 PM
It has potential 7/10 nice teacher/student M/s thing :)

Officelover
11-07-2008, 01:47 PM
I'm sorry. Excellent writing, but this just doean't sit well with me.

Sorrow Becomes Her
11-08-2008, 01:51 AM
yeah, the main charactor and the other girl are15-16. The teacher would be sent to jail in a heartbeat for that. It's just highly unrealistic. Keep working on it. Keep improving your writing skills. =) :o

Justamale
11-08-2008, 11:19 AM
So far so good, keep going

Playstation
11-09-2008, 06:43 PM
Carry on please...

Lil C
06-06-2009, 02:00 PM
really good please continue
though kinda creepy givin that it's like pedophilia

molten man
06-08-2009, 02:28 PM
Nice potential to develop into a vary nice story!!

It is a little rushed though!!

the doc
05-16-2010, 02:28 PM
this isnt 18+ for nothing its alright the plot is good
just put a bit more detail in it and take it easy its not really getting to me like this

BettyBoop
06-10-2010, 10:18 AM
this isnt 18+ for nothing its alright the plot is good
just put a bit more detail in it and take it easy its not really getting to me like this
There's no point asking the OP to put more detail in seeing and this thread was last active in 2008 and I'm going to take a guess that he's not writing any more.

molten man
06-14-2010, 09:33 PM
There's no point asking the OP to put more detail in seeing and this thread was last active in 2008 and I'm going to take a guess that he's not writing any more.

lets hope he comes back.. The story had potential!!